Good News
“No, I can’t throw out that piece of paper that’s been on the floor for a week. That’s the cats’ piece of paper, idiot.”
“My dog knows more English words than I know dog words”
Yes, there's a high likelihood that your parents and grandparents are still having sex.
"When I flip my dogs ears inside out those are his party hats. He is ready for a party."
WHAT'S HAPPENING
"Our main goal is to help people feel the confidence to enjoy their vacations and their lives to the fullest at any size."
Consider yourself lucky if you have a friendship like this.
“just collabed with my dog on a walk”
“Getting stoned when you have a cat is awesome. It will just walk in and I’m immediately cracking up. Like look a this dude, f**king love this guy”
Would you rather send a long, wordy text than short, rapid-fire ones? There could be a psychological reason, according to experts.
“[Leaving the party at 7:30pm] Sorry I have to go home and give Prozac to my cat”