The Laughing Dead

The Laughing Dead is an incredibly cheesy low budget film without any value. It handles about a bus-load of social misfits (guided by a priest who lost his faith and impregnated a foxy nun) on a sightseeing tour around Aztec ruins in Mexico. There, they're awaited by a bunch of demons, zombies and mad-raving creatures in order to kill them during the 'Death Festival'. The first 45 minutes of 'The Laughing Dead' is very tedious viewing since they're presenting us a character drawing nobody really cares about. The priest and the nun are re-united and he learns he's the father of a bratty kid. There's no intrigue and the acting is very lame so the first half is very tough to sit through. After that, The Laughing Dead turns into a joyful splatter movie with cheesy make-up effects and a repulsive amount of blood. People's heads are chopped off (and used as a basketball), buses drive over torsos and one poor bastards even has his own arm shoved down his throat!! The film is bad and extremely amateurish, but there's a market for this kind of crap. So, if you're in to gory nonsense you can check this one out.

Mayan horror movies don't exactly come in spades, so it's always interesting to dive into one. Even if it's such a ridiculous affair like "The Laughing Dead". Some priest - currently in conflict with his own faith because he impregnated a luscious nun once - organizes an excursion towards the Mexican boarder to introduce a varied bunch of travellers to some ancient Mayan festivities. The first half of the film mainly consists out of dull character drawings and some inexplicable nightmare sequences. Then, once arrived at the small Mexican village, things start to get amusing as the group encounters some evil Mayan doctor who loves to sacrifice kids to some ancient Death God in order to inherit the powers of The Bloodstar. Or something, 'cause it's all a heap of nonsense anyway. Now, the main reason to watch The Laughing Dead is for the special effects by Magical Media Industries (featuring one John Carl Buechler in their ranks). They manage to concoct several awesome effects & gory killings... There's a bit of demonic possession. A woman rips open her naked chest and tears her own heart out. A guy gets crushed by a bus. Another dude's head gets decapitated & used as a basket ball. The best kill is probably that of one guy who's arm gets ripped off and shoved down his own throat. During the movie's climax the undead come stumbling around and two people even magically transform into two giant, dinosaur-like monsters & proceed to duel each other. You won't hear me labeling this a 'good movie', by far not, but it sure is a fun, demented ride.

After the initial mean-spirited sacrifice of a little girl by Mayan cultists, The Laughing Dead spends an excruciatingly dull forty minutes on build-up: a bunch of obnoxious characters (including a loud man who tells bad jokes, his irritable friend, a troubled teen stowaway, and a new-age hippie couple) join Father O'Sullivan (Tim Sullivan) on his annual archaeological expedition to a Mexican town celebrating the 'festival of the laughing dead'.

On the way, they coach stops to pick up a woman, Tess (Wendy Webb ), and her potty-mouthed son Ivan (Patrick Roskowick). Father O'Sullivan recognises Tess - an ex-nun with whom he had a love affair - and realises that Ivan is his son. Nothing of any real interest happens until the halfway point, when the group finally arrives at the town and settles in at a hotel, at which point it's as though someone has slipped some peyote into the drinks of everyone involved - the film suddenly goes completely bonkers, with lots of gory, surreal deaths, the bloody action culminating in a game of basketball with zombies and a battle between two Mexican kaiju! It doesn't make much sense, but at least it's entertaining.

The splattery fun starts with a woman ripping open her bare chest, pulling out her still beating heart, and swopping blood pumps with Father O'Sullivan, who becomes possessed by the 'death god'. The next fun effect is the (none-too-soon) decapitation of one of brash joker Dozois (Raymond Ridenour), his severed bonce flying out of a window to land in a basketball hoop; meanwhile his headless torso spurts claret from the neck wound. And there's a juicy moment when the group's coach - driven by supernatural forces - rolls over a man's head. Meanwhile, the cult's leader, Dr. Um-tzec (played by director Somtow) is busy ripping the hearts out of numerous blue-faced kiddies, with his eye on Ivan as the ultimate sacrifice. Perhaps the most memorable scene of all involves the possessed priest going crazy in the hotel lobby: he punches his fist through a woman's skull, squelching her brains in his hand, and then pulls off a man's arm and pushes it down the guy's throat, the fingers visibly twitching in his neck!

The crazy finalé involves the survivors fighting the forces of evil by trying to throw a basketball through a stone hoop, their opponents being a team of mouldy reanimated corpses. As the game plays out, Dr. Um-tzec and mulleted research assistant Cal (Ryan Effner) transform into giant rubbery creatures and duke it out. In the end, Ivan takes responsibility and throws the winning shot, and Father O'Sullivan is returned to normal when Tess declares her love for him, at which point I imagine the effects of the peyote wore off and everyone wondered what the hell they had been doing for the past few days.

5.5/10, rounded up to 6 for IMDb. It's totally nonsensical, but packs in lots of impressive practical special effects. If anything, the film answers that burning question 'What should I do if I find Mayan graffiti scrawled on a wall in what looks like fresh blood?'. Why, dip your finger in it and taste it, of course!

Truly one of the worst movies I've ever seen but that doesn't mean it has no redeeming value. I love how Patrick Roskowick's character is a totally over the top out of control ADHD brat who swears like a drunken sailor all the time. In other words, a typical American teenage boy. The kid is feisty, obnoxious and self absorbed but you know that deep down he has a heart of gold. (Just kidding!) When "Ivan" (the terrible) dons his special Aztec (or is it Mayan?) ceremonial sacrifice costume he changes his attitude.

The gore and blood spatter are ridiculously over the top and the "special effects" are as good as in any 1960s 8mm home movie shot with Dad's Kodak by a nerdy teenage boy in the AudioVisual club at school. In other words: Bad! But who cares?

I read an online review that said: "The child actor in this movie gave the all time worst performance by any child actor in history." Clearly the person who wrote that knows nothing about really bad child acting! Patrick's "Ivan" was the Sir Laurence Olivier of child acting compared to some bad child actors I've seen (yes, I'm looking at you, Jake Lloyd!) All in all, The Laughing Dead is a movie I would have never even remotely considered watching but gave it a chance. This movie actually has a few laughs in it. It really does try to be a horror/comedy. Sometimes it's funny when it didn't mean to be but that's beside the point. So, it's bad, but not all bad. As predicted, this was Patrick Roskowick's one and only movie. Too bad. I wanted to see him in The Laughing Dead 2 - Ivan's Revenge.

The delights of this movie lie in the fact that so many of the characters are played by writers of science fiction, fantasy, and horror rather than by professional actors. Somtow's talents as a popular writer are hardly in evidence here, though he is clearly a gifted musician and composer; that really is him playing the piano. The scene in which he rips out the hearts of children one after another is hilarious rather than grotesque. Tim Sullivan brings as much soul-tortured emotion and dramatic range as he can to a silly script; his flailings and roars while being possessed are delightful. Gregory Frost, whose fiction is noted for comedic rage (much like the work of John Cleese and Carl Hiaasen), exudes a haughty if inexplicable fury at everyone around him, while real-life jokester Raymond Ridenour has a great time being himself (while named for science fiction editor Gardner Dozois). Larry Kagen, at the time a bookstore owner,is fervent and rather sweet as a doting husband who rises above his wife's attempts to henpeck him. Krista Keim, as his wife, is totally believable as a crystal-worshipper; according to Frost, she really did believe in the powers of crystals at the time the movie was shot. Premika Eaton delivers every line poorly and was cast because she is Somtow's sister, not for any innate talent; she is, however, pretty. Ed Bryant, a great favorite among horror fans, steals every scene he appears in; Sullivan reports that they had to shoot the 'great big armadillo' scene several times because the two of them couldn't stop laughing (and adds that Bryant was squicked by the scene of his own death). Tim Powers is barely visible as a zombie; look for his red flannel shirt in the zombie scene near the end.