Become a ‘Superconnector’!

Nowadays, people often call me a ‘superconnector’ – a person who always seems to be connecting people to other people, to resources, and to ideas and useful information. That wasn't true 5 years ago; back then, I wasn’t comfortable with networking at all. Like many people, I was reticent to get out of my comfort zone and speak with strangers.

Over time, I have come to understand that networking really is essential for continued career success, and that networking is all about developing mutually beneficial relationships. I also learned that networking doesn’t have to be something to dread; it’s a skill that can be learned, and—with practice—anyone can get comfortable doing it. (For specific guidance on how to get better at networking, see my related article “How to Introduce Yourself Effectively When Networking”.)

Becoming a superconnector takes networking to the next level: it strengthens the connections between you and your contacts, and positions you to maximize the value you can get from your network. I’ll discuss that more in a moment, but first let’s make sure we’re clear on some basic concepts about superconnecting.

Dispelling Some Myths about Superconnectors

If you’re feeling hesitant about becoming a superconnector, perhaps you might have an inaccurate impression about what one is. Let’s dispel some myths:

Myth 1: Superconnectors are all extroverts

While it’s true that many superconnectors are extroverts, plenty are introverts. I consistently come out on the Introvert side of the scale on Myers-Briggs assessments, which simply means that I tend to derive energy more from solo and small-group activities than from large-group activities. I’m quite comfortable with public speaking and have learned to be comfortable in larger groups, but my natural tendency is still to favor solo activities and one-on-one or small-group interactions. Introversion is not in conflict with superconnecting activities, which usually involve very few people at a time.

Myth 2: Superconnectors have huge networks

You might reasonably assume that a superconnector needs to know a lot of people in order to make connections, but that isn’t true. Superconnecting is all about noticing opportunities and facilitating connections, and this can be done even with relatively small networks if the relationships are of high quality. Clearly, a larger network is likely to create more opportunities, but a large network is not a prerequisite.

Myth 3: Superconnectors connect with everyone and have superficial relationships

A follow-on to Myth 2 is that people assume that superconnectors must be in the habit of adding everyone to their network. I don’t recommend connecting to people indiscriminately (which I call ‘promiscuous networking’); that merely clutters the network without adding value. (For more on this, see my article Networking for Quality, not Just Quantity.)

Superconnecting is all about being discriminate and deliberate. It’s about getting to know your networking contacts, paying attention to their expressed and potential needs, thinking about who or what you know that might help them, and facilitating connections. The connections you facilitate are more likely to be successful if you have a good, solid relationship with each of the people you’re connecting.

Myth 4: Superconnectors are self-centered power brokers

Because superconnectors are so effective at making things happen, it’s easy to imagine that they must be like the Godfather, considering whether to grant pleas to supplicants, and looking for a quid pro quo. Some well-connected people have that attitude, but true superconnectors have a different philosophy:

• They aren’t concerned about how they’ll benefit by helping others; they focus on what other people need, and facilitate connections generously.
• They enjoy seeing how a significant proportion of the connections they facilitate lead to a high-value outcome.
• They’re secure in the knowledge that when they need something, the gifts that they’ve given to their contacts will generate a desire to reciprocate, and that their network will happily step in to help.

Characteristics of a True Superconnector

Now that we’ve dispelled any misconceptions, let’s focus on what a superconnector really is. True superconnectors, as I define the term, are:

• Appreciative of the uniqueness of others
• Genuinely interested in their interests and needs
• Generous with offers of help (but not to the point of being annoying)
• Constantly looking for opportunities to make connections
• Unconcerned about reciprocation

Upon meeting someone, a superconnector listens attentively, asks questions that uncover needs, and considers what can be brought to bear to help satisfy those needs. Some possibilities include:

• a link or reference to a relevant article
• a lead to a potential customer, job opening, or other opportunity
• an introduction to a potentially valuable contact
• relevant industry news
• questions that lead to deeper consideration
• feedback and suggestions

Of course, each encounter is unique, so a superconnector must be adept at going with the flow and adapting to the current situation.

The most important characteristic of a superconnector is the mindset of helping, without concern about reciprocation. For more about this topic, see my article “Moving Your Thinking Beyond What’s In It For Me”.

Benefits of Becoming a Superconnector

True superconnectors focus first on the needs of others, but do reap clear benefits for themselves as well:

1. Satisfaction From Doing Good

Helping people just feels good. Knowing that you were the catalyst that made something good happen can be immensely satisfying. Of course, not every connection you facilitate will create value; some of the seeds you sow will fall on barren ground and die, and others some will sprout promisingly only to wither later, but some will take root and grow into beautiful and productive gardens.

2. A Stronger Network

Every time you make an introduction between people in your network, you refresh their memory of you. Introductions provide a great reason to reach out to connections you haven’t contacted in a while.

3. Greater likelihood of getting help when you need it

When you make a habit of being a giver—of serving the contacts in your network by giving generously without concern about what’s in it for you—most people will happily respond when you make a request that gives them an opportunity to reciprocate.

For example, I used to write up notes from meetups I attended and send those out to anyone who wanted them. When my tax advisor suddenly became unavailable one February, my network responded to my request for help with more than a dozen referrals to tax advisors they trusted.

Many times each month, I ask someone in my network if they’d be willing to speak with someone else, and I have yet to encounter a case in which someone declined. Of course, the introduction often leads to a productive networking connection between the two people I introduce, but nevertheless, the openness and graciousness my contacts have shown in response to my requests has been truly inspiring.

Start Helping Your Contacts Today!

You can become a superconnector quickly by developing new habits. Just start making an effort to consider the interests and needs of the people you encounter, and think about how your contacts and resources might be helpful. Soon, you’ll find yourself catalyzing connections, and your contacts will thank you. And over time, you’ll enjoy great benefits in return—appreciation, satisfaction, goodwill…and help when you really need it.

Jim Schibler leads product management teams that deliver software experiences customers love, and writes on a broad range of topics. See more of his articles at his website.

Copyright © 2017 Jim Schibler — All rights reserved

Image credits: Showman, Godfather - public domain, Introduction - US Embassy Pakistan.