Across Cultures and Screens: The Many Faces of Charisma

You're sitting in a packed room; eyes fixed on the keynote speaker standing confidently on stage. There's a palpable silence; nothing moves, no murmurs, just their voice cutting through the quiet. You're gripped, completely hooked not even fully aware of why. Their hand gestures seem to speak a language of their own, perfectly matching the rhythm and meaning of their words. Your eyes and ears are locked. It's something intangible, invisible even, yet deeply powerful.

Days later, during casual conversations over drinks with friends, you find yourself effortlessly recounting the speaker's key points. In mentoring sessions, you naturally share their insightful advice, seamlessly weaving their wisdom into your own narrative. Their message, their fluid delivery and authenticity has been imprinted indelibly in your mind.

And then there are moments when you're not even in the room when this unspoken connection reaches you through a screen.

You recall the most captivating TED Talk you’ve ever seen. It left such a deep impression that you acted on the advice immediately. You didn’t just hear it you felt it. The speaker wasn’t physically there, but the connection was real.

But charisma doesn’t always need a stage or a screen. Sometimes, it unfolds over coffee or lunch, during a business catch-up or a casual meeting. The conversation flows effortlessly, the ideas spark, and the energy becomes contagious. So contagious, in fact, that it lingers even after the person has left. You return to your office feeling elevated, inspired, and just a little more energised.

So, what is this invisible force, this compelling presence that makes certain individuals unforgettable both in person and online?

To me, that’s charisma.

The Roots of Charisma and Cultural Nuance

We often first encounter charisma in the simplest of moments: a greeting. Whether it’s a firm handshake, a warm “Good morning” before a team meeting, or the way someone welcomes you at the start of a conversation, this moment matters. It holds weight. You’re either engaged or disengaged, often within seconds. And that first impression can leave a lasting imprint.

The name charisma finds its origins in ancient Greece, from the word kharis, meaning personal power or favour. It embodies the innate ability to captivate and attract others through an irresistible charm and magnetism. But charisma is not fixed, it’s expressed and interpreted differently across the world.

I’ve lived in Kenya, the UK, Canada, and now Australia. I’m Indian by origin. Across these countries, I’ve seen how greetings and expressions of warmth shift depending on cultural context. In India, for example, a traditional greeting with hands pressed together and a slight bow, Namaste, signifies deep respect and recognition of the divine in another. It’s profoundly different from the firm, assertive handshake that’s standard in many Western settings.

In Australia, charisma often wears the easy-going face of a “Hey mate,” while in parts of Europe, it might be the customary kiss on each cheek. These aren’t just etiquette they shape how connection is built. Understanding and adapting to these nuances isn’t just polite it’s charismatic.

The Balance of Warmth and Competence

Charisma often gets misrepresented as a mysterious trait reserved for those naturally gifted in captivating a room. But charisma is something more tangible, learnable, and deeply human. It’s the magic formula for making people feel valued and understood.

In essence, charisma involves two fundamental qualities: warmth and competence.

Warmth is about genuine connection, how you smile, hold eye contact, use open gestures, and choose empathetic words. Competence is equally crucial, communicated through the language you use, words like productivity, effectiveness, outcomes, and strategy as well as body language, posture, and gaze.

Striking the right balance between warmth and competence is critical. Lean too heavily into warmth, and you risk being seen as overly casual or not taken seriously. Overemphasize competence, and you may come across as aloof, intimidating, or difficult to connect with.

This is where flexibility and self-awareness come into play.

Charisma isn’t about picking one style and sticking to it it’s about reading the room and adjusting your presence accordingly. Whether you’re networking over drinks after a conference, meeting middle managers and executives for the first time, or presenting to a boardroom full of decision-makers, each moment calls for a slightly different emphasis.

Sometimes, a relaxed tone and shared humour break the ice. Other times, it’s clear structure and confident delivery that earn trust. Charismatic individuals use emotional intelligence to sense the moment and shift their style with intention, knowing when to lean into warmth and when to lead with gravitas. It’s this adaptability that gives charisma its polished effectiveness.

A Dance Between Followership and Leadership

Charisma isn’t just about presence it’s about resonance. The kind of energy that doesn’t just fill a room but ripples through it. Neuroscience gives us a fascinating clue here: mirror neurons in our brains allow us to reflect the emotions and actions of those we observe. When we’re around someone charismatic, we unconsciously begin to mirror their tone, expressions, and even posture. It’s not just imitation it’s connection.

This mirroring is closely tied to what psychologists call emotional contagion our tendency to 'catch' the emotions of others. A charismatic leader doesn't just speak well; they make you feel something. Their calm can ground a team during chaos. Their excitement can spark motivation. These emotional exchanges trigger the release of dopamine, the brain’s reward chemical making it quite literally feel good to be around them.

That’s why charisma in leadership isn’t about being the loudest voice in the room. It’s about creating space where others feel seen, heard, and valued. Where confidence and humility exist side by side.

Over the years, I’ve come to see charisma as a dance between leadership and followership. A great leader invites others in, not through control, but through emotional presence. And followers lean in not because they’re told to, but because they feel drawn to.

Sometimes it can be as simple as a thoughtful gesture:

• The leader who ends a meeting and goes round the room by asking, “Do you have anything you’d like to share?”

• The one who holds the door for you not for show, but out of respect.

• The person who pauses mid-conversation to ask, “Am I pronouncing your name correctly?” a moment that says, you matter.

These aren’t grand acts, but they create a kind of psychological safety a quiet signal that says this is a space where you feel like you belong, be seen and heard. They build trust and loyalty. And they form the backbone of true charisma in leadership: not command, but connection.

When Charisma Misses the Mark

But what happens when charisma goes wrong?

Sometimes, all the elements are present, the expressive gestures, confident tone, and enthusiastic delivery. And yet, something doesn’t sit right. The words sound right, but they don’t land. The connection feels forced. This is over-authenticity when charisma becomes more about performance than presence.

Instead of building trust, it begins to erode it.

You might notice the subtle shift in language: “I” instead of “we”, a focus on personal success over collective purpose. Attempts to connect feel rehearsed rather than real. And when that happens, it becomes a self-fulfilling dynamic the harder someone tries to appear relatable, the more distant they seem.

Charisma, when overused or misaligned, can alienate rather than inspire. Because true charisma isn’t about being impressive it’s about being real, attuned, and anchored in sincerity.

Or it can be when the kind of leader whose presence feels like a dark cloud entering the room. Their communication is one-way, lacking warmth or curiosity. Conversations feel like a monologue, not a dialogue. You can sense the tension build, the unspoken discomfort humming beneath the surface like a low drumbeat. The brain registers this environment as unsafe, activating a fight-or-flight response. Cortisol levels rise, and instead of engaging, people either shut down emotionally or operate in silent fear. Productivity suffers, creativity disappears, and psychological safety is nowhere to be found. This is not a dance between followership and leadership it’s an ongoing battle that no one truly wins.

Charisma in Different Roles

My career has taken me across four countries, through different industries and environments. Sometimes I left jobs by choice; other times, I stayed because of financial or visa constraints. But in every context, one thing remained constant: charisma mattered. Whether I was engaging with senior executives or chatting with operators on the ground, how I showed up, my presence, tone, and energy shaped the connection.

What I’ve come to realise is that charisma isn’t a one-size-fits-all trait. It adapts to the hat you’re wearing.

As a professional, charisma often looks like competence grounded in clarity, listening well, delivering with confidence, and building credibility through presence. As a thought leader and personal brander, it’s about voice and visibility, sharing ideas that are resonant, authentic, and compelling. In committee work, charisma leans into collaboration: holding space for others, asking the right questions, and helping drive consensus with empathy and respect.

Each role calls for its own nuance. Charisma becomes a toolset, one you draw from and adjust depending on the people in front of you, the platform you're using, and the impact you're hoping to make.

At its best, it’s not about impressing others, it’s about engaging them. Because when charisma aligns with purpose, role, and intention, it becomes a catalyst for trust, momentum, and influence.

Digital Influence and Online Charisma

And today, charisma is no longer confined to physical presence.

In a world that increasingly operates online, the new way of influencing is digital charisma. It’s how you write, the words you choose, the tone you strike. It’s the photos you post, the way you smile in them, the setting behind you. A photo in a boardroom with the logo of a top university in the background? That might signal competence. A candid shot in nature? That could suggest warmth and openness.

Even the smallest details whether you appear alone or with others, whether your posts invite dialogue or deliver direction shape how others perceive you. In many ways, your online presence speaks long before you do. And in this space too, charisma matters.

Final Reflections

In any role where you're representing yourself before a service or product, charisma becomes your edge. It’s not just about being liked it’s about influencing others, earning trust, and inspiring action.

On screen and through online messaging, charisma is conveyed through a powerful mix of verbal and non-verbal cues. TED speakers, for example, use clear, engaging language, confident body language, and genuine enthusiasm to draw you in. They create intimacy and a sense of shared purpose through storytelling, vulnerability, and a compelling vision.

The same is true on platforms like LinkedIn. Influential voices build charisma by fostering real connections, sharing authentic experiences, and actively listening. They balance confidence with humility, communicate with clarity and conviction, and lead with empathy. By making others feel seen and valued, they don’t just share ideas they inspire movement.

Through all these experiences, I’ve learned that charisma isn’t about becoming someone you’re not. It’s about amplifying the best parts of yourself in the moment. It’s about making people feel heard, included, and inspired. And when done well, it leaves a lasting impression long after the meeting, the presentation, or the Zoom call has ended.