Beyond Care: The Transformative Power of Compassionate Support

Today, I had the most inspiring experience. I had an online meeting with John and Tamara, and it brought back all the memories of a journey that began in September 2021. It was then that Rob, John’s younger brother, reached out to Grandmama, looking for a caregiver for his parents, who live in Greece. Rob and his brother were both living in the States, so it was challenging for them to find a solution they could trust. He mentioned that he had come across Grandmama through someone else’s experience and decided to reach out. Little did I know then, this would become one of the most memorable cases of my career.

Rob's father had dementia and Parkinson’s and didn’t speak Greek. His mother, of Greek origin, was in the early stages of dementia. Despite these challenges, both were still relatively independent at the time, and Rob was primarily looking for someone to check on them three times a week, making sure they were taking their medication, eating properly, and generally doing well. COVID had added another layer of concern, so we found a nurse, Helen, who began visiting them regularly. Since Rob was in the US, I took on the responsibility of handling all communication, becoming the bridge between the family and the caregiver.

Then, two months later, Helen, the nurse,  called me one afternoon, sounding anxious. Rob’s father had a high fever and had fallen recently, leaving him unable to move. She had already called a doctor, who tested him for COVID. The test came back positive, and as if that wasn’t enough, an X-ray showed he had fractured his hip in the fall. So there we were: dementia, Parkinson’s, COVID, and a broken hip all at once. I immediately contacted Rob to let him know what was happening, and it was clear we needed to act fast. Rob knew very little about the Greek healthcare system but mentioned that his father had a strong insurance plan through Blue Cross. He asked if I could help, and I knew I had to step up. This family needed someone to go above and beyond for them, and I was all in!

The first step was to get in touch with their family doctor, who, unfortunately, was less than cooperative. Despite living only two blocks away, he refused to visit the house, simply instructing us to move Rob’s father to the hospital. With public ambulances overwhelmed due to COVID, I arranged for a private one and asked Helen to stay with him until they arrived. I made countless calls, coordinating between the hospital, the ambulance, and the family, doing everything possible to ensure he would be admitted. But when the ambulance arrived at the public hospital, they refused to accept him due to his age, citing new restrictions for COVID patients. I pleaded with them, but there was nothing they could do. Exhausted and frustrated, I had him brought back home, and the next day, I reached out to the doctor again. His response was the same: he couldn’t do anything and insisted on sending him to a public hospital, as private facilities weren’t accepting COVID cases.

In the days that followed, I refused to give up. I called hospitals, arranged for another caregiver to help, and finally found a doctor who understood the urgency of the situation. She went out of her way to assist, and we managed to get him admitted to a COVID unit. For 17 days, I was in constant communication with the hospital, updating Rob and his brother, helping them understand what was happening so they could make informed decisions. The doctors recommended surgery for his hip but suggested waiting until he was COVID-negative due to the high risks involved. Rob and his brother agreed, and we waited patiently for the virus to clear.

Throughout this period, it was a constant struggle. The COVID unit was overwhelmed, and getting any updates felt nearly impossible. Every day was a battle just to get a response. But after 17 days, he finally tested negative and was stable enough to be transferred. Rob’s father insurance allowed for a private hospital, so I coordinated the move, making sure he had all the necessary paperwork and a negative PCR test. We thought we were in the clear, but when he arrived at the private hospital, a new PCR test still showed him as positive. Defeated but not giving up, we arranged for him to go back home, where we set up a schedule with two nurses covering shifts to care for him around the clock.

I reached out to yet another private hospital to discuss their procedures and was told we could do a PCR test at home and move him directly once it came back negative. We arranged the test, and when the results finally showed negative, we moved him to the hospital for surgery. He stayed there for another week with a private nurse, and despite the stress of constant coordination with doctors, surgeons, and caregivers, the surgery was successful. After the hospital stay, he returned home, but with a new wound on his back that required care from yet another homecare team.

In the meantime, Rob flew to Greece to help organize things. With his father’s condition worsening, they decided to find a live-in caregiver for both parents. However, finding someone with the right experience, who spoke English, was willing to take on this challenging role, and could care for both dementia and Parkinson’s was no easy task. We conducted multiple interviews, with Helen also assessing each candidate, but after 10 interviews, none accepted. It was beginning to feel impossible.

Then came Tamara. She agreed to take on the role, despite the demands, and it was a tremendous relief for everyone. Tamara didn’t speak English, but we managed with translations, helping her communicate with the family. Over time, she formed a bond with them, treating them as her own family, and became an integral part of their lives.

Today, three years later, Tamara is still with John’s and Rob’s parents, caring for them with the same dedication she started with. During our meeting, Rob’s older brother, John, expressed his gratitude, saying to Tamara, “I feel like you’re my sister.” When I translated this to her, she replied with equal warmth, “I feel the same, you are my brother, and these are our parents.” They hugged, and in that moment, I felt a profound sense of purpose. This is why I do what I do. It’s for moments like these, where people through the most difficult circumstances come together, not just as caregiver and client, but as family. Not every case turns out this way, but when it does, it’s pure magic.

PS: I have changed the names for obvious reasons but I kept Tamara's real name. Thank you Tamara!