Combat worry & uncertainty with this one, simple practice.

Have you ever worried about something so much it was hard to think of anything else, or go about your daily routine? 

Me too. 

Worry can turn your mind into a hamster on a wheel, running in circles and unable to get off. Your ability to think clearly, make decisions, focus, stay present…all hijacked by an unending loop of thought and worry. When left unchecked, worry can disrupt our energy, mood, focus sleep, performance at work, decision-making, relationships, happiness, and even our physical health and immunity.

Worry is a complex experience worth breaking down: worry and anxiety go together like peas and carrots. Anxiety can take many forms, and worry is one of them...and one of the most common experiences of stress. Worry can feel like uncertainty, unease, or fear (fixation on the future) or rumination (fixation on the past). But it can also feel like: being unsure, feeling tense, regretful, hesitation, or overwhelmed, feeling indecisive, unsettled, scared, confused, anxious anticipation of the unknown, a feeling of foreboding, or even shame or embarrassment (if your go-to is reflecting back on past failures, mistakes, or painful memories) (Brene Brown, one of the leading experts on emotion doesn't consider worry an emotion as much as “the thinking part of anxiety," which, given how varied we can experience worry, makes a lot of sense).

How we manage worry tells us a lot about ourselves and informs our mental wellbeing. So what if you could free yourself from your worries? Not by magically making them disappear, but by taking better control of them. Would you want in on this?

There's a name for this skill: worry scheduling. Worry scheduling is a cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) technique typically used to treat clinical anxiety. and involves intentionally scheduled time in your day dedicated to your worries and uncertainties. Rather than trying to stop worrying, you do just the opposite: lean in.

Here's how it works (and why)

Research has long shown that people who regularly schedule worry time reduced their overall worry, anxiety, stress and depressive symptoms significantly more than people using standard anxiety treatments. Scheduling just 5-15 minutes of worry time a day, for many subjects in these tests, helped them remain more focused on the present moment, sleep better, and reduce the amount of worry in their lives. 

And this is not new science, either - as far back as the early 1980s, researchers were able to see significant improvement with this technique. In fact, some researchers like Tom Borkovec, a professor emeritus of psychology at Penn State University, believe that embracing the natural and productive experience of worrying is key to reducing worry and anxiety in our lives in general (in other words, worrying about worrying and avoiding worrying are actually counterproductive).

 So, how can you get off the rumination train using worry time? 

Worry scheduling in action

The process could be broken down into 3 steps:

1. Awareness and Acknowledgement. 

2. Delay the Worry

3. Honor Your Worry Time

Here's how it plays out:

Think about something you're worried about right now: a deadline you're up against, the state of the economy and world, your to-do list, or maybe something personal (or, if you're anything like me, just wait 5 minutes and the next worrisome thought pops up…).

You can even add worry time to a habit you already have in place: brushing your teeth, walking the dog, or even blocking a few minutes in your work calendar to take a walk and mull things over (though I might avoid scheduling worry time right before bed, when it can disrupt your sleep).  

Don't set any expectations about solving your worries, or generating solutions (though you might find that solutions come about naturally, once you start reflecting). Just allow yourself to think about this worrisome thing and feel all the feelings.

If you feel yourself starting to worry during unscheduled times, which is bound to happen, try redirecting your attention: breathing, a quick walk outside in nature (which has been shown to reduce worry anyway), reframing or maybe a mantra or positive affirmation, to bring yourself back to the present moment. 

Want to make it a really sticky habit? Set your worry time as a regular, standing appointment. Make it 5 minutes, or 15 minutes - whatever you need. Any amount of time you can commit to it is worthwhile. And if you really want to build your muscle in this space, set aside a few separate minutes at the end of the week or month to reflect on your worry time notes. Look for repeat offenders: patterns of worry that appear again and again. Once you identify these, you can prioritize working towards solutions or any changes you want to make.

When first researching this skill for a client a few years ago, I had to test it out of course. I scheduled worry time once a week for around 2 months, and I learned a lot. What I noticed was that I had worry triggers: certain situations, people, even times of the day, were triggers for me. I can confidently say that after about 2 months, I worried less, and I also learned how to “shrug off" certain worrisome thoughts more easily because I recognized the triggers (e.g. “Oh, I just spoke to so-and-so…I always worry more when speaking to her.”).

Final thoughts

The act of intentionally scheduling time for worry, and writing down what worries you, can be a healing experience. It can provide a deeper perspective on your worries than the uncontrolled worrying and negative thoughts often interrupting your day. Scheduling worry time allows you to better control what worries you, and not the other way around.

- Lauren

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