Despairing over Peace? There Is an Answer

By Deepak Chopra, MD, FACP, FRCP

A lesson from bitter experience in the past has returned. Once the war mentality gets into the saddle, the course of conflict must run itself out. For the duration, one is tempted to despair over the possibility of peace on earth. In fact, the phrase has religious connotations, removing it even further from practical life and the hard realities of war.

It is natural to feel despair, but that leads to more futility and helplessness. None of us can control the course of a war, whether it is occurring here or in a foreign country. But there is an antidote to despair that at the same time contributes to the real possibility of peace.

This answer relies not on political parties but solely on people waking up, which isn’t an ephemeral, trivial, or imaginary phenomenon. Right now, the American public is bombarded with war news every day. You can turn your back or grow numb, but from another perspective, you can treat the situation as an opening.

Consider a new tactic, aligning your awareness with peace a little more each day. You might begin in the following way: If you have been dragged emotionally into fixating on war anywhere in the world, pause for a moment and ask yourself a fundamental question:

“Do I want to be part of the problem or part of the solution?”

In my experience, someone who is part of the problem exhibits the following qualities:

1. They identify with tribalism either in religion or politics or both.

2. They demonize the enemy.

3. They divide the issue into “us versus them.”

4. They countenance violence, which they justify as what the enemy, whoever it may be, deserves.

5. They accept anger as a positive force when backed by their own self-righteousness, but condemn it on the other side.

6. They believe that victory is more important than peace.

7. They place a higher value on political loyalty than on compromise, forgiveness, and mutual understanding.

8. When they look in the mirror, they approve of who they see — a realist rather than a war supporter.

9. They follow the dictates of fear.

10. They show inflexible support for authority.

It is part of waking up to be aware of whether these qualities exist in you. Everyone has a trace of them, but it sometimes takes only a trace to prevent you from seeing that completely waking up is necessary if the world is going to solve war. People who are part of the solution exhibit the opposite characteristics.

1. They see tribalism as a primitive holdover from the past and a major force for ignorance and prejudice.

2. They refuse to demonize their opponents, keeping in mind that to do so is to invite demonizing from them.

3. They realize that “us versus them” thinking is political propaganda.

4. They support and work toward ending violence on both sides of the conflict.

5. They feel anger and outrage at atrocities but do not overstep, which is to listen to anger as a replacement for reason.

6. They realize that no one wins in non-peaceful stalemates. Both sides are losers in that the cycle of violence will still move forward in the future.

7. They take the hard road toward forgiveness and understanding, realizing that these are human qualities worth any effort.

8. They look inside to see if the seeds of conflict begin with themselves.

9. They consider fear an emotional reaction, not a reliable guide to reality.

10. They refuse to justify authoritarianism, treating it as absolutely unacceptable.

To begin with, this list applies to your own awareness, not to military policy or diplomacy, areas that we ordinary citizens have no power over. What we have power over is ourselves. No matter how right you think you are, how justified in your anger, how righteous your side is in any conflict, you will never escape the vicious net of war until you see, here and now, that your every impulse is felt collectively. That is your responsibility to society and the world, no longer adding even a grain of sand to collective anger and violence.

I fully expect the most negative responses to come from people who exhibit qualities that contribute to the problem of war, but who would be aghast or enraged by being told that this is the case. War-making is a deep, at times hidden, personal issue that gets amplified to a national issue. It is too convenient as well as irresponsible to overlook the fact that, since the late 19th century, the United States has played a significant role in many major international conflicts, either through direct military involvement, political influence, or support for allies and proxy forces.

This implies generations of citizens utterly conditioned to accept war as a national habit. To break the habit of war, it seems reasonable that we first try to get at why we cling to it. There have been unavoidable wars, often called good wars, where unimaginable crimes against humanity cannot be stopped any other way. It is only realistic to accept this.

Yet conflicts of the kind that fester around the world without breaking out into war should be manageable on the international level, without thinking that the only solution is to kill everyone who looks bad in our eyes. International policing has worked in Serbia, Bosnia, and Kosovo. Terrorism is best handled by internal policing in each country

Finally, if you’ve ever felt peace is an utterly impossible goal, you’re not alone. However, the first step toward peace isn’t grand or global. It’s personal. It’s quiet. It begins with a single question:

“Do I want to be part of the problem or part of the solution?”

Peace isn’t a distant ideal — it’s a daily practice. And every time you choose compassion over division, understanding over judgment, and awareness over reaction, you’re helping to shift the collective consciousness toward something better. The world doesn’t change all at once. But it does change — one person, one moment, one choice at a time. That person can be you.

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