Eye eye tee zee

The Indian Institute of Technology (IIT) is opening its first campus outside India, in Zanzibar. This ‘unique partnership’ will bring the expertise of IIT Madras to Africa, with IITM looking after curriculum and pedagogy. While capital and operating expenditure will be met by the Government of Tanzania.

Most Indians are only dimly aware of Zanzibar; a few have visited the island as Indian tourists expand their horizons beyond London, Payris and Sizzerland. I am one of those Indians, though my reason for visiting was to attend a destination wedding. Where global Gujaratis mingled their kem-chhos with kimchis, nodding to each other, ‘Baddho fine chhe’.

After 3 days of excessive drinking and dance-till-you-faint festivity I ventured out of the resort to see the island. It was appallingly underdeveloped. I mean, sure, there are beautiful beaches with white sands and blue waters. For outsiders. Magar wahan ke rehne waalon ko dekh kar laga, apna Bihar bahut aagey hai.   

This backwardness , however, can only be an asset to future students. Way back in 1951, they set up the first-ever IIT in Kharagpur, several hours from civilisation. Similarly, BITS Pilani. Even IIT Bombay and IIM Bangalore were originally ‘outside the city’, until pools and gyms with housing bubbled up to their doorstep.

The newly set up IITs and IIMs have followed in the same hawaii-clad footsteps. Rumour has it that a high-powered committee blindfolded its chairman and asked him to ‘pin the pin’ on a map. Jahaan nishana laga, wahan IIT/ IIM. Hence, IIM Kashipur and Sambalpur, IIT Ropar and Mandi.

Long weekend par ghar jaane ka chance nahin. Zanzibar has an additional advantage. It can be reached only by sea-plane. You wonder if that tiny thing can take so many passengers. And luggage. But now you are in the air. The propellers are making noise. Too much noise.

Ab thermodynamics aur quantum physics ka kya fayda. Mummy ne kaha tha ‘Hanuman chalisa yaad kar lena’ but nahin, hum to JEE prepare kar rahe the… Waise itna zyada bhi nahin padhe the. Kam rank aaya isi liye Janjibaar mein admission liya hoon. Bhool-chook maaf, chhoton ko pyaar, padosan ko geeliwali pappi…

 Hanumanji being more dayavaan than the humans who set entrance exams, aap bach gaye. Now you must survive the course. Trapped on an island with Resnick and Halliday, very bad food and very little entertainment. A reality show with low TRPs but high MRP (maximum retail package) for its graduates.

Once upon a time, Zanzibar was a hub for the slave trade. We have evolved since then. Today, we willingly submit ourselves to giant corporations which pay us handsomely but chain us nevertheless. In mind, in body, in spirit. If lucky, Big Boss will grant you those two precious weeks of annual leave.

So that you can lie on white sand

With mobile phone close at hand

Posting pictures of relaxation

Taking calls while on vacation.

Jawaani ho gayi barbaad...

IIT admission Zindabad!