From Stress to Strength: Rewiring Reactions Through Emotional Intelligence
Barney Feinberg, PCC, CPCC, CPA
TRANSFORMATIONAL LEADERSHIP COACH & RECRUITER | ICF CERTIFIED COACH | EXPERT IN EXECUTIVE EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE | ELEVATE PURPOSE, IMPACT, PERFORMANCE & STRATEGIC GROWTH FOR COMPANY LEADERS
Stress disconnects us from our values, our clarity, and the people around us. The harder we push against it, the more it tends to push back. So, how do we interrupt stress when it strikes?
When I was young, my father told me to count to ten to calm down before reacting. I’d speed through to two and start plotting how fast I could get to ten. It never worked. Because stress isn’t logic, it’s emotion. And negative emotions, left unchecked, spread like wildfire.
That’s where The Chemistry Factor comes in. It’s your ability to consciously recognize, understand, and empower your values, shifting perspective to take intentional action, quickly and easily, no matter what the pressure.
Take John, an accounting director, scrambling to close the books by the deadline. It was late, the team was drained, and the spreadsheet errors were multiplying. Stress was high.
Here is how Emotional Intelligence and The Chemistry Factor played out:
🧠 Self-Awareness kicked in. John recognized he wasn’t just tired; he was frustrated by how long it was taking.
🧊 Self-Regulation followed. Instead of spiraling, he took a breath, looked at his team, and said sarcastically: “Well, at least if we miss sleep, we’ll close the books and enjoy a big breakfast together.”
🔥 The team laughed. The tension cracked. The mood shifted.
💡 By empowering his value of humor, John realigned everyone’s energy. The focus returned. The job got done.
The truth is that stress will come. But how we meet it defines us. When we shift from reacting to reconnecting, we lead with clarity instead of chaos.
💡 Moral: Stress disconnects. Values reconnect. The leader who empowers their values inspires resilience in others.
📌 What value could you empower the next time stress hits?
🔹 Ready to tackle your toughest leadership challenges? Let's explore solutions that empower your growth and balance. Book a free consultation with me today at my LinkedIn photo
Trauma-Informed Therapist | Author of 'Finding My Way Home' | Mental Health Educator | Mental Wellness Therapist at Marta Jackson, PLLC. Advocate for forming healthy connections with self and the world.
3moThis is such an important reminder, so many of us are navigating emotions in ways we were never taught to understand. Your post made me think of something I shared recently about emotional intelligence and the IFS model, especially the idea of leading from our “8 C’s, like calm, compassion, and courage. I also included some reflection prompts from my journal. If it resonates, here’s the link: https://www.linkedin.com/posts/martajackson_emotionalhealing-selfleadership-innerwork-activity-7202058587530027008-0Cjx/
Speaker, Business Owner, Ownership Lifecycle Expert, CEO of Life
3moStress is inevitable. The choice is how you manage your stress. You are sharing an important message that people need to recognize and understand. Acknowledge that you have stress, understand why and decide how you want to manage it. Take a walk, laugh about it, breath - deeply… whatever allows you to slow down before you move forward. I also think it is imperative to be clear on what you want for your emotional life. What do you want to feel and why and what are the emotions you don’t want in your life and how can you address them.
Keynote Speaker | Author | Multi-Million Dollar Business Founder | Corporate Board Member |
3mo“Stress will come”. I can’t tell you how many people over the years have asked “how did you manage to deal with XXX” and my answer is always “you can’t always avoid the challenges, so it’s how you move past them that defines you”. Thanks Barney.
Author | Speaker | Founder of the MicroStep Method® | Parent Coach | Because Raising Four Daughters Taught Me More About Leadership Than Any Boardroom Ever Could.
3moGreat reminder. Can't let our brains run us--we have to help them use the incredible capacity they have. so hard.
Helping dedicated professionals become unstoppable! Keynote Speaker | Business Performance and Mindset Expert | Leadership Development Trainer | Author | Certified Virtual Presenter
3moBarney Feinberg, PCC, CPCC, CPA, Thank you for sharing this important insight. You provide terrific tips here. I especially like, "Stress disconnects. Values reconnect." This reminds me that when the "What" gets difficult, connecting to your "Why" helps immencely.