The "Good Enough" Leader

In Psychology there is a concept known as the "good enough mother/parent." The idea is that none of us can be or will have a perfect parent. But, if we have one that is just good enough – who provides just enough care and attention when we are children, we will be okay and develop reasonably well as adults.

I’ve been thinking about this as it relates to leaders. There is a lot of attention paid to how to be a great leader.  Be strategic – innovative – compassionate – emotionally intelligent – empathetic – foster independence - provide stretch goals – the list is so long!  But really….can anyone ever be all these things to everyone? And how does it feel to constantly strive to do this?

Maybe, like parents, we just need to be “good enough.”  Perhaps if we provide just enough challenge – just enough compassion – just enough support, people will develop just fine. I know I learned from every leader I ever had. And as time goes on, even the ones I didn’t always think were so great I have a different feeling about now.  They were doing the best they could at the time, and I was still okay! 

The “Good Enough” Leadership Assessment tool. The “Good Enough” Leadership Development program.  Can you imagine the reaction?? 

However, maybe there is something here for all of us to ponder. The next time we feel critical about someone’s leadership in any sector - politics, policing, medicine, business - we can remind ourselves of this bar.  The next time we look inward and feel we’ve fallen short, we can reflect on this. And the next time you are coaching someone on your team about leadership, try out the phrase. “You don’t need to be a perfect leader. You just need to be good enough.”  See what happens!