Hope Deferred, Heart Sick

Hey Mama,

You know what it’s like to wait, don’t you? To pray day after day and still not see change? To hope with everything in you—and feel that hope slip just a little farther away every time a door closes or a prayer seems to go unanswered?

“Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but desire fulfilled is a tree of life.” — Proverbs 13:12, NASB

That verse is painfully real. The word “deferred” here means to draw out or drag along. And when something we’ve prayed for is delayed or postponed—especially something good, something noble, something we feel lines up perfectly with God's will—it can make the heart sick. Deeply weary. Quietly crushed. We feel like our soul is fainting, like David did in Psalm 119:81: “My soul languishes for Your salvation; I wait for Your word.” But this is where the Lord meets us.

As an adult Christian, walking with the Lord for nearly forty years now, I have had my share of these moments—times when hope was drawn out so painfully that it almost felt like it disappeared. But I also know this: the Lord is on the throne. He hears my deepest heart cries—and He hears yours as well, Mama.

The beautiful part of Proverbs 13:12 is the second half: “…but desire fulfilled is a tree of life.” When God answers, when He moves, when He finally lifts the veil of delay—it is life-giving. It is fruitful. It restores our joy. And yet... even while we wait, we are not left without direction or promise.

That’s why I keep turning to this powerful passage in 1 Peter:

“Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, so that He may exalt you at the proper time, having cast all your anxiety on Him, because He cares about you. Be of sober spirit, be on the alert. Your adversary, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. So resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same experiences of suffering are being accomplished by your brothers and sisters throughout the world. After you have suffered for a little while, the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, will Himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you. To Him be dominion forever and ever. Amen.” — 1 Peter 5:6–11, NASB

Those four words—restore, confirm, strengthen, establish—they anchor me. And they can anchor you, too.

• Restore – He brings back what was lost. Your joy, your strength, your peace.
• Confirm – He places you firmly, securely, validating your steps as His own.
• Strengthen – He infuses you with divine might, not your own.
• Establish – He builds you on solid ground, no longer shaken by every delay.

But notice when He does this. After you have suffered a little while. After the trial. After the testing. After the waiting and the hoping and the crying out. After the humbling.

Humble yourselves. That’s the charge. And that, Mama, is the game changer. Because God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble (James 4:6).

That verse hits hard. If I’m walking in pride, in arrogance, in self-will—even if I think my cause is noble—then I am setting myself up to be opposed by the very God I claim to follow. And what’s the point of my cause if I’m on the wrong side of God? I might as well pack it up right then and there. That changes everything.

But for the humble? For the ones who tremble at His Word? For the ones who quietly trust and keep obeying, even when it hurts, even when hope is deferred?

He helps them.

The humble are the ones He lifts. The ones He sees. The ones He restores, confirms, strengthens, and establishes. That’s who I want to be. That’s who I must be.

So Mama, walk that direction. Don’t give up. Don’t let the waiting steal your hope or harden your heart. Be faithful. Faithful to what? To the Word. To the truth. To Christ Himself, the Author and Perfecter of your faith (Hebrews 12:2).

And while you walk? Stay humble. Stay yielded. Stay close to Him.

He hears you. He sees you. And at the proper time, He will move.

And when He does? It will be a tree of life.

Love, Gena