How Fear Quietly Hijacks Your Day—And How to Take the Wheel Back
Mark Danaher, PCC
Helping Career Coaches & Professionals Thrive | Delivering Globally Recognized Career Certifications | Follow for Holistic Career Growth, Meaningful Balance & Lasting Impact
Fear doesn’t always shout. Sometimes, it whispers you into self-doubt, overthinking, and stuckness. But you don’t have to stay there.
Have you ever noticed how subtle fear can be? It doesn’t always show up as panic. Sometimes it shows up as… – Overplanning. – Avoiding a conversation. – Getting stuck in research instead of action.
Recently, I caught myself re-reading the same email draft three times before sending it. Why? Because fear had snuck in through the back door of perfectionism.
Fear at Work and Home Looks Like This:
Hesitating on decisions because “what if it’s wrong?”
Playing small in meetings (or with your own goals).
Snapping at home—not because you're angry, but because you’re overwhelmed.
Putting off self-care because there’s “just too much to do.”
Fear doesn’t just delay our actions.
It distorts our thinking.
It derails our momentum.
Left unchecked, it takes the wheel—and we don’t even realize we’re no longer driving.
The Reframe:
You don’t need to eliminate fear. (That’s not realistic.) You just need to recognize it, regulate it, and redirect it.
6 Grounded Tools to Deal with Fear—Without Letting It Lead:
1. Name It Out Loud
“What exactly am I afraid of right now?”
Why it works: Fear thrives in vagueness. Naming the fear helps shrink it.
Example: Instead of, “I’m overwhelmed by this project,” say: “I’m afraid this presentation won’t be good enough and I’ll look unprepared.”
That gives you something to work with—not just something to run from.
2. Shrink the Decision
“What’s the next right step for the next 10 days?”
Why it works: Fear often turns every decision into a life-or-death scenario.
Example: Instead of “Should I leave my job?” try “Can I schedule three informational interviews this month to explore new paths?”
Clarity builds from action, not overthinking.
3. Anchor in the Present
Try the 3-3-3 grounding practice:
Name 3 things you can see.
Name 3 things you can hear.
Move 3 parts of your body (wiggle toes, rotate wrists, roll shoulders).
Why it works: This brings you out of fear’s imagined future and back into the now.
Example: Use it before giving feedback, starting a tough conversation, or making a big decision.
4. Track the Pattern
Keep a “Fear Log” for 7 days.
Why it works: Patterns reveal the story fear keeps repeating.
Example: You might notice you freeze every time you have to speak up in meetings. That awareness gives you a clear place to practice courage, not just react.
5. Let Your Body Lead
Move your fear physically. Take a brisk walk. Shake your hands. Do 10 jumping jacks.
Why it works: Fear lives in the nervous system. Moving your body sends a signal: I’m not trapped.
Example: Next time you’re spiraling, set a 3-minute timer and move. You’ll return with more calm—and probably more clarity.
6. Ask a Better Question
Shift from “What if I fail?” to “What if this works?”
Why it works: Fear tends to ask questions that keep you stuck. You can flip the script.
Example: Before you send the proposal, apply for the role, or have the hard talk, ask: “What will I gain just by showing up with courage?”
Final Thought:
Fear isn’t the enemy. It’s a signal.
Sometimes it’s trying to protect you. Other times, it’s just running old scripts that don’t serve you anymore.
The moment you stop avoiding fear—and start working with it—you take your power back.
🧭 You don’t need to be fearless. You just need to be willing. And that willingness? It’s how your life changes.
💬 Which tool will you try this week? Hit reply—I’d love to hear.
🔁 Share this with someone who needs a reminder: fear is loud, but your clarity is louder.
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Mark
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