Impact of the boss in anyone’s life

“If this is the way you write, I don’t think you deserve to compete at an All India level”, my boss scowled. I still remember that day when he said this to me in front of the whole staff.

Before joining my current government department, I was a public servant in another organization. In a government set-up, there is a rule to intimate or take permission from the current employer before appearing in the competitive examination for any other government job. Abiding this, I had given my application intimating my intentions to apply for another position and to appear in the examination. Unfortunately, I perpetrated a minor mistake while drafting my application and somehow my boss did not like that.

It is not a normal sight in government offices, boss coming personally to his subordinate for a talk. But that day, right in the morning, even before anybody could settle themselves on their desks, my boss rushed up to me and slammed a file on my table. The file was containing my application. He frowned at me for a good 10 minutes highlighting a few minor mistakes that might have despised him. He even advised me in a taunting way to write in a local language if I was not capable to write 4 lines in the English language properly.

“Remember, feedback is meant to address the problem, not the person.” ― Travis Bradberry, author of Emotional Intelligence 2.0

My face contracted, heart felt a tremor and my self-confidence dipped southwards. I felt so bad and it affected me in such a way that I could not manage to forget his lines for a very long time. Two months later, I appeared in the same examination for which I had written an application. Again, by luck or coincidence, the exam was tough and I could not get it through. Those lines were still hovering on my mind and I began to doubt myself. Was he right? Didn't I really deserve to clear any examination? Was I not good enough to compete at this level?

Whatever, a boss says something that too in a cursing way, actually affects his subordinate. We are often told to ignore such things but it is easier said than done. The truth is, it is not an easy task to overlook such a humiliation when the boss starts hitting below the belt, just to vent his own frustration. In my case, I might have written something that he, as a boss, took as contempt and he could not cease himself from quivering my confidence. He, in a way, might have wanted to prove, who was the boss there.

Of course, it should also be acknowledged that the boss is, after all, a human too and also has sentiments. It is not possible for anyone to constantly drive his emotions at a steady pace on a path that has several ups and downs. But the same thing must be learned by the bosses as well. Their subordinates are not just resources, which a boss can squeeze like anything and make him work all the time without expecting much of emotions in return. The constant pressure of undesirable reprimands affects an employee in many ways.

“We treat our people like royalty. If you honor and serve the people who work for you, they will honor and serve you.”—Mary Kay Ash, Founder of Mary Kay Cosmetics

The efficiency of a worker very much depends upon the conduct of the boss with him. The equation of an employee with his boss determines the productivity that can be extracted from him. The problem is, some bosses forget to consider their subordinates as a human. For them, an employee is merely a tool to get the work done. It may work for a boss but it can never be a sign of a good administrator. An ideal administrator is who earns the respect of his subordinates, not fear. A manager must be approachable and a good listener. Afterall what an employee expects from his organization and his boss at the end of the day? What matters most for an employee, in the first place? - Respect. No monetary benefits, incentive, pay hike, position up-gradation, certification, can replace this.

People work for money but go the extra mile for recognition, praise, and rewards." - Dale Carnegie

How many times we get to see a peeved boss yelling at his subordinates for no reason. How often we enquire about the mood of a boss from one of the personal staff before entering into his cabin. When did the last time you let your boss vent his frustration, his own dejections, failures or personal problem through you?

When I look at a person, I see a person - not a rank, not a class, not a title - Criss Jami

Yes, it is very imperative for a boss to push his subordinates to get the work done in the set deadlines and there are times when situations are adverse when things are not going as expected, and then in the heat of emotions, boss pours in his disappointment onto his subordinates. But before demeaning a junior, I have only one thing to say to every boss - think that he too has a family where he must have respect and importance. He may be the sole breadwinner of the family, he may be the chieftain of his family or even more, his family may look at him only, whenever there is a problem - respect that as well and keep that in mind, your one harsh word can how badly affect his whole day - it is not just his bad day - it may turn into the worst day of the whole family.

There is already so much of a race going in the world, so much of stress in which most of us are already trapped - the leastways we can give anyone is, happiness, Treat everyone as a human first, show respect and try to bring tranquility in someone’s life. We ain't here to just play the role of boss and worker; before this, let's learn to play the role of humanity.

“The challenge of leadership is to be strong, but not rude; be kind, but not weak; be bold, but not bully; be thoughtful, but not lazy; be humble, but not timid; be proud, but not arrogant; have humor, but without folly.”— Jim Rohn, entrepreneur and motivational speaker

Thank you for reading :)