The Myth of Consistency & The Superpower of Perseverance

A while back, a friend of mine looked miserable.

“I feel so average,” he sighed. “I want to be a high performer, but I don’t know how.”

I nodded. “Okay, what does ‘high performer’ mean to you?”

He thought for a second. “It means having discipline, sticking to a routine, and achieving goals through consistent actions.”

“Nice definition,” I said. “But what do you mean by ‘consistent’?”

He gave me a weird look. “I asked for help, and you’re questioning me?”

I grinned. “Maybe. But I need to understand what you mean by it.”

After a deep breath, he said, “Consistency means if I decide to do something, I should do it every single day without missing a beat. For example, if I decide to go for a walk, I must never skip a day. That’s consistency.”

“Wow, strong definition,” I said. Then I leaned in and whispered, “But do you really think it’s possible to go for a walk every single day, without ever missing?”

He hesitated. “Practically… no. But that’s the ideal, right?”

I smiled. “Let’s put that aside for a second. You said you’re sad because you’re ‘average.’”

He nodded.

“Do you know what being ‘average’ actually means?” I asked. “If you commit to daily walking, you should at least do it 3.5 times a week on average. That’s ‘average consistency’ over a year. Are you even doing that?”

His eyes widened. “Uh… maybe I’m below average.”

I laughed. **“Exactly! That’s the real reason most people feel bad about themselves. They think they’re ‘ average.’ But here’s the truth — we’re ALL below average in the long run.”

He blinked. “Wait… what?”

I continued, “Even top performers aren’t perfectly consistent. The difference? They understand this fact. No one is 100% consistent forever, and trying to be only leads to frustration and burnout. Instead of chasing consistency, focus on perseverance.”

He tilted his head. “Perseverance?”

I nodded. “Yep! Consistency depends on willpower, and willpower is like your phone battery — it drains fast. Perseverance, on the other hand, is like your phone’s charging cable — you can keep plugging back in no matter how many times you run out of battery.”

“So, you’re saying perseverance is more important than consistency?”

“Exactly! If you miss a day, a week, or even a month, perseverance means coming back without guilt, without stress, and with the same energy. High performers don’t beat themselves up over missed days — they just get back on track.”

“How do I build that mindset?” he asked.

“Start small. Use willpower for a few days. Then tell yourself, ‘I will never give up.’ Keep practising for 66 days (not 21 — that’s a myth). Slowly, your actions turn into habits. This lasts much longer than forced consistency.”

He stared at me, then smirked. “Where do you study this out-of-syllabus stuff?”

I grinned. “That is a secret,” I said, and we both laughed.

Here’s the Science Behind It:

✅ Willpower is limited — Studies show that willpower isn’t infinite. But believing you have more willpower actually helps (Job et al., 2010).

✅ Habit formation takes time — A study by Lally et al. (2009) found that it takes 66 days on average (not 21!) to form a habit.

✅ Perseverance rewires the brain — Neuroplasticity research proves that habits strengthen over time, even if you miss a few days (but don’t ghost your habits for months).

✅ Consistency can backfire — The “what-the-hell effect” (Polivy & Herman, 2002) explains why missing one day often makes people quit entirely. Perseverance prevents this guilt trap.

Key Takeaways:

1️⃣ Forget perfection — focus on persistence. 2️⃣ High performers aren’t always consistent, but they always come back. 3️⃣ Missing a day (or week) doesn’t ruin progress — quitting does. 4️⃣ Habits take an average of 66 days to form, not 21. 5️⃣ If you are ‘average’ in your habits, you are already doing great!

So, would you rather chase impossible consistency or embrace perseverance and succeed? 😉