The Myth of Loyalty at Work

It’s time we called out one of the most persistent fictions in professional life: loyalty at work.

It feels like it exists, especially when you’re showing up early, staying late, quietly shouldering the extra weight. You do it because you care. Because it feels right. Because you believed you were part of something worth protecting.

But the moment your care takes the shape of courage, everything changes.

You become inconvenient. Your questions are recast as complaints. The narrative shifts. Your standards are no longer admired. Your honesty is reframed as risk.

That’s when the slow machinery begins:

• “Concerns” raised with no record
• Deadlines quietly moved
• Whispered meetings, where the minutes vanish
• Feedback delivered like a script
• A version of you, written by others, without your voice

You’re not imagining it. You’re not too sensitive. And you’re certainly not alone.

"Enter the dodgy management style: Managed upwards. Then managed out. It’s not support - it’s strategy.- Mark O'Hare

So, why does this corrosive dynamic persist?

Because in many workplaces, loyalty has been misdefined. What’s rewarded isn’t integrity, but obedience. And obedience, in turn, gets mistaken for safety.

In systems that prioritise image over truth, someone showing up with integrity can feel dangerous. Their honesty, their challenge, even their silence – it threatens the illusion. And in protecting that illusion, organisations stifle innovation, erode trust, and haemorrhage their most valuable asset: genuine human capital.

It’s even more stark when governance becomes theatre. When boards are filled not with challengers, but with allies. Blood relatives. Trusted former colleagues. Carefully chosen silence – the active suppression of dissent – in place of scrutiny.

I saw it up close. And the rot was undeniable.

I watched a failing leader protected at all costs. Watched as values dissolved. Decisions bent to serve appearances. Accountability vanished. Ethics were sidelined. Harm was rebranded as "necessary pressure."

And when the consequences became impossible to ignore, they didn’t correct course. They hired an expensive HR professional – not to rectify the harm, but to ensure legal compliance, rather than true integrity. To contain the damage.

They knew. They just hoped I’d stay quiet.

Instead of reckoning, they rewrote the plot. I wasn’t safe because I had failed them. I wasn’t safe because I no longer played along.

So what can you do?

First, remember: it’s not personal. It feels personal, because the tactics are. But this isn’t about your value. It’s about their system.

Second, stay loyal – on your terms. Be loyal to your principles. Your wellbeing. Your work, not just the workplace. That might mean loyalty to your craft, your impact, or the pursuit of excellence.

Third, stay grounded. Document everything. Ask for clarity in writing. Trust your gut, but anchor it in evidence.

And don’t do it alone. You only need one person who sees you clearly. That’s enough.

It might be time to step away when:

• You’re praised in public, punished in private
• You’re carrying someone else’s chaos, daily
• You’re no longer seen, only managed
• The culture grows foggy, even as your values stay clear
• You feel dread in your chest by Sunday night

And if you lead a team, ask yourself:

• Do we reward honesty, or only agreement?
• Are people safe to challenge, or just to comply?
• What truths might be going unsaid – and what is that silence costing us?

Because real loyalty isn’t extracted. It isn’t assumed.

It’s earned – in small, human moments. Built when people are allowed to show up fully, question openly, and still belong.

Not because they conform. But because they care enough to stay honest.

Reflection prompts / CTA:

• Have you ever felt the cost of staying loyal to the wrong thing?
• What would change if your workplace earned loyalty instead of expecting it?
• What do you owe to your work, even when your workplace falls short?

#WorkplaceCulture #QuietLeadership #IntegrityAtWork #BoardAccountability #HumanFirst