One year on, and off.. the mat

In December 2015 I finished a masters degree which I took while working in a full-time marketing consultancy job. My body and mind needed a break from the world of digital and data which had consumed my life for the previous two years. Although a rejuvenating fortnight in a lush hotel in the Bahamas certainly was appealing, I suppose looking back I was searching for something deeper - without diving too far! So I decided to stay on the learning path a little longer and signed up to an intensive 200-hour yoga teaching diploma.

My intention, when putting myself through the twenty-one days of rigorous physical and mental training was never actually to become a yoga teacher. That probably sounds pretty bizarre but apparently, it's more common than one would think. The course was held over 21 consecutive days and it thoroughly put me to the test! To my surprise, after my yoga exam, I was offered a full-time teaching job by the college.

I wasn't expecting that.

Because I wasn't physically the bendiest or aesthetically in any way close to the mind-blowingly talented yogis of Instagram, I had never even considered that I would be asked to teach. Nor did I really want to! My niche was in client services – creating and closing potential sales, generating revenue – that sort of thing.

Out of mear curiosity, I met with Jo from the training college for a green-tea the following day. She explained to me that it was 'my way' which they felt was special, not my ability to be a contortionist. With Jo's unexpected belief in me, and my own intuition giving me a gentle nudge, I accepted the offer! On Valentine's Day last year, I taught my very first yoga class. The moment I put on my (metaphorical) teachers hat, my whole world changed! Yoga quite literally turned everything I knew on its head. You see, for more than a decade I had worked hard, refining the sales process, listening to clients’ needs and providing meaningful solutions, in turn, the exciting world of closing sales, coupled with the luxury of earning a healthy wage became my way of life.

That said, it didn't take me very long to adapt to my new routine. Being a yoga teacher as you can probably guess was immense fun! I began to meditate every single day, I created playlists to suit the style of my classes. During yoga nidra, I read poems or created guided meditations based solely on my mood. Almost immediately I built up a steady pace of teaching twenty or more classes a week. From the get-go, many people came to me after class and wanted to talk to me or simply thank me. I had many messages asking to find out more about the ideas discussed during class, people from all walks of life were intrigued about the spiritual side of yoga. Perhaps known or unknown to ourselves many of us are seeking some sort of spiritual guidance in our lives. The solace that can be felt in a room full of people offering their intention to the greater good really is a special feeling. Going to church is not something many if any of my peers do on a regular basis and I believe some sort of ‘divine guidance’ or spirituality is something our society is craving without even knowing.

I had a childlike excitement to be teaching and learning every day, for the first few months it was wonderfully fulfilling. Unfortunately, after four months at this pace and on that wage, I started to burn out - mostly financial. As synchronicity would have just as the bills were mounting I was contacted about a well-paying corporate job. LinkedIn can be a wonderful thing!

But was the universe helping - or perhaps testing me?

I questioned my motives deeply - was I thinking of going back for money? Dirty filthy money. We all know that it really does help the world go round, and pay my voracious rent at the time living in Dublin 4! I debated it with myself for a couple of days, was I really so quickly wandering away from a path which I was only beginning to forge? I loved teaching, however, unless you're very smart about it being a yoga teacher doesn't pay particularly well. I also loved sales, which fortunately or perhaps, unfortunately, does pay pretty well! I was confused and anxious as hell, however, this question brought me to a place from where I realised that each of our day to day problems can become portals for awakening. I took a deep breath, meditated a ton, and - I accepted the job offer. I continued to teach part-time and as sort of payoff to my higher self I booked a three week trip to Dharamsala, India departing six months after my start date with Audi Ireland.

To summarise my journey during the past twelve months wasn't so much about learning how to balance in headstand or lift up into a perfect wheel. For this yogi - the truth was that I needed to learn more things about yogic life 'off the mat' than on it. I stood and faced my fears. Fears, some of which I never previously even acknowledged. One year ago I thought that I was supposed to have it all figured out by thirty. I assume that many clever millennials already have it all figured out! But for me, currently, less than a week away from my thirty-first birthday, I am excited and aware that my journey is only just beginning. Each day little by little I try to work on myself in a loving a gentle way. I believe if you can strive to feel good, do good and on a day when you feel brave enough try to fully accept whatever shows up for you - on and off your mat.