Owning Your Power in Midlife: No More Playing Small

Have you ever caught yourself saying...

“Maybe I’m too old to try that now.”

“Who do I think I am… to want more?”

“This dream is probably too big, too late, too much.”

Let me stop you right there.

You were not put on this earth to shrink. Not in your 40s. Not in your 50s. Not ever.

Midlife is not the season for fading out—it’s the one where you TURN UP the volume of your life.

So let’s talk about what it really means to own your power in midlife—and why it’s time to retire your membership to the Playing Small Club (they don’t even serve wine, anyway 😉).

The Subtle Seduction of Playing Small

Let’s be honest—most of us didn’t set out to live small lives.

But over time, we learned to make ourselves... manageable.

We got really good at:

• Dimming our ideas in meetings so we didn’t come across as “too ambitious.”
• Downplaying our desires so we didn’t rock the boat at home.
• Shrinking our dreams to fit the space we were told we should occupy.

And if you’re like most of the brilliant midlife women I work with, here’s what I know about you:

You’ve ticked the boxes. 

You’ve done ALL the things.

 Career? Check.

 Family? Check.

 Stable-ish life? Check.

But there’s a quiet voice inside whispering...

“Is this really it?”

That voice? That stirring? It’s your POWER waking up.

Signs You’ve Been Playing Small (Even If You Didn’t Mean To)

Let’s just call it out—because awareness is power.

You might be playing small if:

• You’re always waiting for the “perfect” time to start something.
• You don’t speak your mind unless you’re 100% sure you’re right.
• You hold back in rooms where your voice should be leading.
• You say yes when you want to scream NO.
• You’ve forgotten what you even want anymore.

Here’s the truth: Playing small isn’t humility. It’s self-abandonment.

And you? You’ve outgrown that version of yourself.

What Owning Your Power Actually Means

Owning your power isn’t about being louder. It’s about being real.

• It’s walking into a room and not needing to perform.
• It’s choosing your voice over someone else’s comfort.
• It’s remembering who the heck you are—and acting like it.

Let’s break it down. Owning your power means:

• Saying what you actually mean (not the watered-down version)
• Deciding without apologizing
• Wanting what you want—without guilt
• Taking up space in your own damn life

It’s not about becoming someone new. It’s about returning to the you that was buried under decades of expectations.

 “But What If I’m Scared?”

Oh, honey. Of course you’re scared.

• You’ve been taught to be liked, not powerful.
• To be accommodating, not assertive.
• To keep the peace, even if it costs your joy.

But I want to offer you a reframe:

What if your fear isn’t a stop sign—it’s an invitation? What if fear is just the edge of the life you actually want?

Feel the fear. Then move anyway!

Because boldness isn’t the absence of fear—it’s the decision that you matter more than your doubt.

4 Ways to Reclaim Your Power (Starting Today)

Let’s make this real. Here are four small-but-mighty ways to stop playing small:

1️⃣ Speak the truth you’ve been holding in.

Even if your voice shakes. Say the thing. Even if it’s just to yourself in your journal.

2️⃣ Make a decision without crowd-sourcing it.

You don’t need six opinions. You need one: yours.

3️⃣ Interrupt your own autopilot.

Ask yourself: Is this what I really want? If the answer is “no,” start getting curious.

4️⃣ Spend time with women who make you feel expansive.

The ones who remind you of who you are. The ones who don’t shrink in your light.

You don’t need to burn it all down. But you do need to stop waiting to feel ready.

🎁 FREE Midlife Audit: Your First Step to More

If you’re ready to rise, but you're not sure where to start—I've got you.

I created a FREE No-More-Excuses Midlife Audit to help you get crystal clear on: 

✅ What’s holding you back ✅ What you truly want ✅ What needs to shift for you to start living bigger, louder, bolder

🎯 Download it here →https://sallyarkellboles.com/ (It’s only FREE during the first 6 podcast episodes—so grab it while it’s up!)

🎧 Listen to my Podcast Episode: Limitless in Midlife – Episode 5

This blog was inspired by this week’s Limitless in Midlife podcast episode: “Owning Your Power in Midlife—No More Playing Small”

Inside the episode, I go deeper into:

• The quiet ways we sabotage our power
• The internal narratives that keep women shrinking
• What it really takes to step into your power (without apology)

🎧 Tune in now + subscribe for weekly soul-fueled episodes made for midlife women who want MORE. YouTube

Spotify

💬 Final Word

You don’t need to be fearless. You just need to be done settling.

This is your season to rise. To stop editing yourself. To stop apologizing for wanting more.

Because you weren’t meant to fit into someone else’s mold. You were meant to take up space in your own limitless life.

So tell me in the comments—or message me privately—👇  

What’s one way you’re choosing to own your power this week?

Let’s make this chapter the most unapologetic one yet. 💜 You’ve got this. And I’ve got you.

See you in the next edition!

Stay limitless,

Sally