Personal Ethics = Professional Integrity? A Deeper Look into the Signals We Overlook
Virginia Fuentes-Itarte (She/Her)
Former Global Head of People & Culture | HR & Leadership Advisor/Fractional to Startups & Scale-ups | Driving Growth & Transformation in VUCA & Multicultural Environments| Coach & Mentor| Connector
Lately, I came across a video of a CEO who was talking about her approach to business ethics. One comment stuck with me: she said she doesn’t want “cheaters” sitting on her board. Not just business cheaters—but people who’ve been unfaithful in their personal lives. Around the same time, I heard a similar conversation on the financial podcast Dimes y Billetes, and it got me thinking.
This is a topic that has always fascinated me. As someone who tries to operate with strong ethics in both business and life, I’ve seen a lot over the years—subtle behaviors, questionable decisions, and patterns that repeat. It’s made me wonder: can personal choices, like infidelity, be a reflection of how someone might behave professionally?
It’s not just an old-fashioned idea. There's growing psychological evidence suggesting that patterns of deception in one’s personal life—like infidelity—can be a red flag for moral flexibility in other areas, including business.
A 2016 study by Lynn M. Reynolds and colleagues, published in the Journal of Business Ethics, found that individuals who scored high in "moral disengagement" were more likely to justify dishonest actions both at home and in the workplace. In other words, the rationalizations people use to cheat on a partner can mirror those used to justify fraud or misconduct.
In fact, a large-scale 2019 paper titled “Cheaters in the Boardroom?” used leaked data from Ashley Madison (a site for extramarital affairs) and found a statistically significant overlap between executives on that list and future corporate misconduct. While correlation isn’t causation, the data raises real questions: when someone breaks a vow in their personal life, does it suggest they may cross lines in professional contexts too?
Even the Mafia had a code: “We don’t trust men who cheat on their wives.” In their brutal world, that was a litmus test for loyalty. If you can lie to the person closest to you, they reasoned, what stops you from lying to your crew?
Of course, not every unfaithful person is a fraudster, and not every faithful CEO is a saint. But as stakeholders, board members, and even employees, it’s worth paying attention to the pattern behind the persona. Ethics isn’t compartmentalized. It leaks from bedroom to boardroom.
So next time we talk about “due diligence,” maybe we should look a little deeper.
🗂 Sources for Further Reading:
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3moThought-provoking. I love the Mafia code of honor thrown in there. Is the mafia not the perfect example of no work-life separation- or rather the complete overflowing of "work" into "home" life?
Bilingual Writer & Editor (English/Spanish) | Helping brands connect with UK & LATAM audiences through authentic content & co-creation strategies | London
4moThis post is fun! Philosophical, deep fun! I don’t have a good argument, just a personal preference. I also have an observation: so far, only women’s comments. Going back to your post - and my personal preference - I could say that we’ve seen how bad for all of us have been politicians who are cheaters. Boris Johnson being the epitome of dishonesty. And another observation: I’m glad we’ve entered a polyamory period, lying is no longer needed.
Leadership development & Well-being Coach | Team Facilitator | ICF & EMCC accredited | ex-Adland Creative | MSc Behaviour Change in Coaching | Compassionate Mind Training | Keen alpine climber
4moThe work domain, intimate life domain, social domain... they are different domains of life with nuanced social differences and values underpinning how we show up. Perhaps there is some overlap in some values in certain domains, but who is honestly the same person at home, at work or with friends? I like to think we are multidimensional, have boundaries and can prioritise our attention. To be honest, the CEO intrigues me as her statement sounds like a black and white thinking trap or a sign of someone who doesn't have boundaries between work and personal life.
Consultant, trainer, facilitator, coach
4moWhat a great provocative question to consider. In my experience strong and effective leaders are consistent in their behaviour, values and actions. I struggle with the idea that a leader might apply one set of values to business life and another to personal life. If honesty and integrity is important in one’s business dealings wouldn’t it also shape the way one operates personally?
Aligera tu sobrecarga laboral desarrollando otros patrones emocionales y de trabajo | Conecto con estrategia la gestión emocional y la productividad | Coaching para managers con equipos estancados sin objetivos claros
4moI share your perspective, and although, as Gabriela says, there are nuances, the truth is that if you are unfaithful, to continue with the example, you will betray your team in one way or another in the professional sphere or family and friends in the personal sphere. The point is that these are the types of people who don't see anything inappropriate in it, and that's the problem. If you justify any behavior to clear your conscience or your lack of respect, you will do it in any sphere of your life.