Reflection: The Real Teacher

Paddy Upton

George Clooney once said you learn everything from failure and nothing from success. It’s a bold claim, and like many bold claims, it sounds convincing in the moment. But it misses something crucial.

My experience is that both success and failure are silent. They don’t speak, they don’t automatically reveal lessons. The real teacher is what we choose to do afterwards. Reflection is the practice that transforms an outcome into a lesson. Without it, both success and failure are neutral experiences.

Success, Failure, and Ego

After success, what do most people do? They celebrate, move on, often nurturing their way through a literal hangover and skipping the review. After failure, most are more inclined to stop and interrogate what went wrong. Yet the opportunity for learning exists in both. It’s not the scoreboard that matters, but the willingness to pause, ask questions, and extract meaning from what just happened.

This is where ego enters the story. What many people fear isn’t failure itself, but the potential repercussions of failure — judgment, criticism, shame. That fear often stops people from trying in the first place. And when the ego takes over, reflection is avoided. We either cling to success as proof of worth or hide from failure to protect reputation. In both cases, the chance to learn is lost.

One of the most common regrets people carry later in life is not the failure itself, but the things they never tried. The opportunities they passed on because of how it might look if they didn’t succeed.

Harbhajan’s Example 

Harbhajan Singh’s story illustrates this powerfully. Early in his career, he experienced both extremes: being picked, winning man of the match awards, and then being dropped. Just as he was finding his place, a bigger blow arrived — his bowling action was called illegal. In his words, it felt like the end of his career.

He could have stopped there, letting failure and judgment define him. Instead, he went to England, worked on rectifying his action, reflected on what needed to change, and rebuilt his game. That wasn’t failure teaching him. It wasn’t success either. It was reflection — the conscious process of reviewing, adjusting, and coming back stronger.

Reflection Beyond Sport

This principle travels well beyond sport. In business, teams that only celebrate wins risk missing out on crucial insights. They start to believe the process is flawless just because the outcome was positive. Equally, organisations that only interrogate mistakes create cultures of fear, where reflection becomes a search for blame rather than growth.

The most effective leaders are those who make reflection a consistent practice, regardless of the outcome. Win or lose, they interrogate their performance some version of the same two revealing questions:

• What worked, that we need to keep doing and refining?
• What can we do even better next time?

In both cases, the tone is one of curiosity, not judgment. The focus is not on protecting ego, but on learning. 

A Closing Reflection

Reflection is not glamorous. It doesn’t fit neatly into a headline. But it is one of the most reliable differentiators in performance. Without it, we repeat mistakes or ride temporary highs without realising why. With it, we build awareness, resilience, and the capacity to grow through whatever the game, the market, or life throws at us.

Clooney gave us a provocative line. Harbhajan gave us a lived example. Both remind us of the same truth: success and failure are just data points. Reflection is what turns them into teachers. 

So, after your next big win or your next setback, pause and ask: what is this here to teach me? Because in the end, it’s not the outcome, but the reflection, that will shape the next chapter of your story.