Rising Strong: Healing the Inner Critic

Have you ever caught yourself thinking, “I should be doing more,” or “Why did I mess that up again?” Maybe you’ve even said things to yourself you’d never say to someone you love.

If so, you’ve met your inner critic—that persistent, judgmental voice that often masquerades as motivation, but usually just leaves us feeling small, stuck, or ashamed.

The truth is, we all have an inner critic. But healing it is a powerful part of rising strong.

Why the Inner Critic Shows Up

Your inner critic didn’t show up to ruin your day—it showed up to protect you. It often comes from earlier experiences: harsh feedback, unrealistic expectations, moments when we were made to feel not enough.

But while it might have started with good intentions, over time, it turns into a voice that…

• 🧨 Undermines our confidence

• 😔 Keeps us from taking risks

• 🌀 Makes us dwell on our mistakes

• 💬 Repeats old messages that no longer serve us

To rise strong, we don’t just silence this voice—we listen to it differently.

The Cost of Listening to the Inner Critic

When we believe everything the inner critic says, we:

🚫 Avoid opportunities we’re more than ready for 🚫 Stay silent instead of speaking up 🚫 Set unrealistically high standards—and feel like failures when we don’t meet them 🚫 Over-identify with our flaws, rather than our strengths

The inner critic thrives on shame and perfectionism. And that’s where the healing begins.

How to Start Healing the Inner Critic

You don’t have to banish your inner critic. In fact, trying to fight it often makes it louder. The key is to shift your relationship with it.

1️⃣ Give It a Name (and a Seat)

Your inner critic is a part of you—but it’s not all of you.

Try this:

• Name the voice (maybe “The Perfectionist,” “The Worrier,” or “Mr. Not-Good-Enough”)

• When it shows up, imagine it sitting beside you—not driving your decisions

• Acknowledge it: “I hear you. I know you’re trying to help. But I’ve got this.”

This distance gives you space to respond with intention—not reaction.

2️⃣ Ask: What’s the Fear Beneath the Criticism?

Most inner criticism is fear in disguise.

• “You’re not ready” might really mean “I’m scared to fail.”

• “You messed that up” might really mean “I want to feel safe and respected.”

When we uncover the fear, we can respond with care instead of criticism.

💬 Try asking: “What’s this voice trying to protect me from?” “What does it need to feel safe?” “How can I reassure myself instead of attack myself?”

3️⃣ Replace Harshness with Curiosity

Instead of, “How could I be so stupid?” try: 🔄 “What can I learn from this?” 🔄 “What would I tell a friend in this situation?” 🔄 “What do I need right now to move forward?”

Curiosity opens doors. Criticism slams them shut.

4️⃣ Practice Self-Compassion—Out Loud

Self-compassion is not self-indulgence. It’s a skill. And it’s powerful.

Start small:

• “It’s okay to feel this way.”

• “I’m allowed to make mistakes.”

• “I’m doing my best, and that’s enough right now.”

• “I am growing, even when it’s messy.”

The more you practice this voice, the stronger it becomes.

5️⃣ Keep a Kindness Record

At the end of each day, jot down one thing you did well, handled with care, or tried—even if it didn’t go perfectly.

Build a collection of moments where your inner coach (not your critic) led the way. This becomes your proof: I am growing. I am capable. I am enough.

Rising Strong Means Being on Your Own Side

Healing the inner critic isn’t about silencing all doubt. It’s about creating a louder, kinder voice that believes in you—especially when things feel hard.

So next time the inner critic shows up, try this:

💡 Pause. 💡 Listen gently. 💡 Respond with compassion. 💡 Remind yourself: You are not broken. You are becoming.

You’re not alone in this work. And every time you choose kindness over criticism, you rise stronger.

With you,

Karmen 💬