🚘 Scofflaws, Caffeine, and Parking Karma: My Life in Tickets (and Why It’s All About Parking)

We all have that one parking ticket story. I have several. But before we get to handball, Mello Yello, and a boot of justice, let’s talk about the term that ties it all together:

What’s a Scofflaw, Anyway?

In parking enforcement lingo, a scofflaw is someone who racks up unpaid tickets like they’re baseball cards. Their fate? A boot, a barnacle, or an impound lot somewhere just past the edge of town.

But here’s the kicker—“scofflaw” was invented in 1924 during Prohibition, not by city officials but by a wealthy Massachusetts man named Delcevare King, who offered $200 to anyone who could coin a word to shame illegal drinkers. Two folks submitted the same word—“scoff” + “law”—and split the prize.

Originally aimed at cocktail smugglers, the term now lives on in city halls and campus parking offices alike.

⚖️ Joliet, 1991: Three Tickets, One Court Appearance, and a Mello Yello Buzz

Back in '91, I was 18—working, attending Joliet Junior College, and reconnecting with a childhood friend from my paper route days in Braidwood. We’d hit up a 24-hour gym late at night, playing handball and goofing off, caffeinated to oblivion on Mello Yello.

One night after our gym antics, I parked outside my uncle’s house in a quiet subdivision—facing the wrong direction on the street. No big deal, I thought.

I was wrong.

The next morning: three parking tickets, all from different officers. I’d never received a ticket before, and like an 18-year-old genius, I ignored them.

A few months later, while getting ready for work in my uncle’s basement, my aunt called down:

“There’s a police officer here. He has something for you.”

Cue internal panic. It wasn’t an arrest—just a court summons.

So there I was, standing alone before a judge, staring at three fines plus penalties. I explained honestly:

“Your Honor, I didn’t know parking the wrong direction was illegal.”

The judge waived two tickets and the penalties. I walked out with one $50 fine—and a life lesson.

🎓 Ithaca, 2009: A Ticket on the Day That Changed Everything

Flash forward to 2009. I was interviewing for a job at Cornell University ’s Transportation Department—a role that would change my trajectory.

Normally, I biked, walked, or carpooled to Cornell. But for the interview, I drove myself and parked in what I thought was a legal spot.

Later that day: Boom. $30 parking ticket.

I freaked out. I gave someone $30 and asked them to mail a check. I didn’t want that ticket to jinx my chances.

Turns out, it didn’t. I got the job. And that ticket became one of my best stories. Because I got the job—and one of my roles? Adjudicating parking tickets.

I can’t make this up.

🎤 "I Got a Ticket the Day I Was Hired" (And Other Customer Service Icebreakers)

When I worked in appeals at Cornell, people would email, write, or show up—sometimes furious.

I’d listen carefully, explain policies, then share:

“Hey, I understand. I got a parking ticket on the day of my Cornell interview… and I still paid it.”

That usually disarmed them. Some laughed. Others paused. Many listened.

Then, I’d go one step further—educating, not just adjudicating.

💰 Why You Pay for Parking (and Why It’s More Expensive Than You Think)

I’d often explain that parking isn’t just a slab of asphalt and a white stripe. It’s real estate. And infrastructure. And math.

When I gave presentations—at Cornell, across the country, or on webinars—I’d talk about the true cost of a single parking space:

• A basic surface lot space? Around $10,000 to build.
• A structured garage space? Between $19,000 and $30,000.
• An underground space? Often $25,000 to $80,000+, due to added structural requirements.

That’s before you even touch maintenance, enforcement, snow removal, signage, lighting, or staff time.

I’d tell people:

“Think about your own driveway. Whether it's blacktop, concrete, or gravel—it costs money to build and maintain. Now scale that across a college campus, a hospital, or a city center. Parking isn’t free. Someone’s always paying for it.”

And no, that doesn’t even get into enforcement costs or the technology it takes to manage it all.

🤔 “Where Are We Gonna Park?”

Honestly, it is all about parking.

Whether you're planning a dinner out, a Chicago Cubs , or a job interview—what’s one of the first questions?

“Where are we gonna park?”

We ask it without thinking. It’s funny. It’s frustrating. But it’s real.

And over the years, I leaned into it. When I’d talk to friends or colleagues in the mobility world—or just joke with people heading to Wrigley—I’d say,

“It’s all about parking.”

They’d laugh, maybe roll their eyes, but the point stuck.

And from there, we’d talk about carpooling, biking, public transit, or rethinking the timing of travel altogether. Not every trip needs to look the same—and sometimes the most impactful change starts with a shift in mindset. Education and empathy are powerful tools, especially when wrapped in a good story.

📚 A Nod to Donald Shoup

This way of thinking was heavily influenced by the late UCLA Professor Donald Shoup Shoup, who became a mentor and friend. His groundbreaking book, The High Cost of Free Parking, completely reframed how I think about cities, transportation, equity—and yes, dinner plans.

The average car is parked 95% of the time. That should tell us something about how we design—and misunderstand—urban space.

I’ll be doing a deep dive into his work and a fresh review of the book in a future article.

💬 Your Turn

Have you ever been booted, towed, or scofflawed into embarrassment? Got a parking horror story—or maybe a surprising act of kindness from a parking enforcement officer?

Let’s hear it.

And if you’ve never gotten a ticket—congratulations. You’re a unicorn.🦄

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