“What If It’s Not the Job — But You?”

Facing Your Own Patterns Without Shame or Spin Let’s get uncomfortable, shall we?

We’ve talked about whether to stay or go. We’ve explored how to quit smart and how to stay on your terms.

But there’s one conversation many professionals avoid — even the smart, self-aware ones.

“What if I’m part of the problem?” “What if this isn’t the first time I’ve felt this way?” “What if the pattern… is me?”

Pause. Breathe. Don’t scroll away just yet. This isn’t a guilt trip. This is your career therapy checkpoint.

🪞 Mirror Moment: When Every Job Starts to Feel the Same

If every job eventually leads to:

• Feeling undervalued

• Resenting your manager

• Burning out under unspoken expectations

• Watching others get ahead while you play safe…

…it might be time to ask:

“What’s the common denominator?”

(Hint: It’s you. But that’s not an insult — it’s empowerment.)

🧠 4 Self-Coaching Prompts for Pattern Disruption

1. When did I last feel this stuck… and how did I handle it?

If your “way out” is always a dramatic exit, maybe you’re repeating a cycle — not solving a problem.

2. Do I secretly believe suffering = value?

Be honest: do you chase hard roles because easy feels like cheating? You might be addicted to struggle, not success.

3. Am I always the ‘Nice Guy’… and quietly resentful?

Saying yes to everything doesn’t make you noble. It makes you invisible — and bitter. Your boundaries are your brand.

4. Do I avoid confrontation — then blame others for walking over me?

If you keep handing out doormats, don’t be shocked when people wipe their feet.

⚙️ Rewriting the Narrative: Less Blame, More Ownership

The goal isn’t to become cold, transactional, or “corporate.” It’s to move from reactive to reflective.

You don’t have to shame yourself for old patterns. You just have to stop renting your career to them.

🧭 A Mindset Shift Worth Printing Out

“If I’m part of the pattern, I’m also part of the solution.” No spin. No shame. Just growth.

🔁 Let’s Talk

Ever had a moment where you realized… it wasn’t them, it was you (or at least partly)? What helped you break the pattern?

This is the kind of self-honesty that builds careers — and character. It Is What It Is

Until next time, Suresh MK Executive Coach. Pattern Disrupter. Accountability Partner.