When Compassion Counts
Lorraine Eivers x FCIPD
THEHRCareerCoach 💜 I help HR Leaders find work they LOVE and lead with IMPACT. You're not meant to just SURVIVE. Let's find your clarity and courage to write your next career chapter so you can THRIVE!
Hi and welcome to issue #33 of THEHRCareerCoach newsletter. Whether you're here to reflect, reset, or just feel seen in your HR journey, I’m so grateful to have you with me 💜
This month, I want to talk about something heavy, but vitally important.
How we treat people in their darkest moments
A new client came to me recently. Her husband had died suddenly and tragically, and while navigating that unimaginable grief, she also found herself dealing with a different kind of pain: the cold, impersonal response from her employer.
No meaningful contact. No acknowledgement of her loss beyond the procedural. No humanity.
In stark contrast, her husband’s employer responded with incredible kindness. They installed a defibrillator in his memory. They raised money for his son. They stood with his family in their grief. The difference in care was striking and devastating.
This isn't a one-off story.
I’ve seen and heard it all before, sadly - from poorly handled redundancies, settlements, radio silence after miscarriage, to employees navigating suicide bereavement while their workplace quietly pretends it’s “business as usual.”
And here's the truth:
People will ALWAYS remember how you made them feel…especially in the moments when their world has fallen apart.
This is a place where culture is made. Not in the away days or the purpose statements. But in the quiet phone call. The flexibility granted. The decision to treat someone as a human being, not a resource.
So, if you're in a leadership or HR role, please let this be your reminder:
🟣 You don’t need to have the perfect words. But you do need to show up.
🟣 Don’t rely solely on policies. Lead with compassion.
🟣 And if you're unsure how to respond to grief, trauma or crisis - please ask. There is no shame in saying: “We want to do this right, can you help us?”
There are brilliant people out there who do know what to do. Coaches. Counsellors. Trauma-informed HR professionals. Don’t let fear or awkwardness become the reason someone feels unseen when they need support the most.
And if you’re reading this as someone who’s been on the receiving end of silence or mismanagement after a life-altering event - I see you.
I know the scars that kind of hurt can leave. And I want you to know that it wasn’t your fault. You deserved better, they got it wrong!
This is a call to do better:
✔As employers.
✔As colleagues.
✔As humans.
If your HR function is stuck in silence or unsure of how to handle complex, painful situations - please know you don’t have to figure it out alone. Don’t let it be the reason you lose great employees and damage company reputation.
And if you’re a HR leader who’s a lone voice trying to make a difference in a culture where your values no longer align - my GAIN CAREER CLARITY programme can help you pause, process and rebuild with purpose.
If you have been on the receiving end of shabby treatment from your organisation and are ready to take back control of your career, and life, then let’s have a chat
https://calendly.com/lorraine-eivers-coaching/30min
Until next month,
Lorraine 💜
THEHRCareerCoach 💜 I help HR Leaders find work they LOVE and lead with IMPACT. You're not meant to just SURVIVE. Let's find your clarity and courage to write your next career chapter so you can THRIVE!
3wThank you for the reshare Swaty Hemraz 💜
Workplace Mediator | Conflict Consultant | Specialising in Conflict Transformation at LK Mediation Services
2moSo true and the amount of mediations I do where the parties of scarred by how their employer treated them through a redundancy process
🌎 Helping climate solutions professionals & advocates speak with unshakable confidence for a stronger impact | Communication Coach | Job Interview Coach | Positive Intelligence Coach | Speaker 🌎
2moTHANK YOU for this. It's especially important for companies and organizations who claim to have a "family" atmosphere to treat their employees compassionately in difficult times. And that extends to when the organization needs to lay people off. The ENTIRE department I once worked for was closed by the larger organization. In the years leading up to it, we were forced to start laying people off. With each layoff, we recognized the individual with a gift and sincere thank you from others in the larger department. We sometimes were able to honor them with a small gathering. But there was always recognition. When the program I worked for was shuttered, all we got was indigent silence. A few angry words at the larger organization for forcing the situation. No goodbyes. No thank yous. No card. No gift. Just anger at the institution. It took me years to get over my anger about this--especially because the organization had this "family" kind of atmosphere. I guess it was family--dysfunctional family. Thanks for pointing out the need for being there and showing compassion rather than business as usual radio silence.
Corporate Trainer | Executive Coach | L & D Professional - Open to L & D roles where my extensive experience and passion for people-development can add value to an organisation.
2moExcellent article Lorraine Eivers FCIPD, at these vulnerable moments how events are handled is so important.