When the Past Walks Into the Office: What Leaders Should Know and Do About How Childhood Adversity Impacts Work Experience

by Susan J. Schmitt Winchester - Susan J. Schmitt Winchester & Associates, LLC (susan@susanwinchester.com) and Dave Ulrich - Rensis Likert Professor Emeritus, University of Michigan and Partner, The RBL Group (dou@umich.edu)

Introduction: Leadership Patterns We Don’t See

Most business and HR leaders today recognize that mental health is a business issue. But few connect the dots between adult mental health challenges and unresolved childhood trauma. Research shows that nearly 67 percent of adults experienced some form of childhood adversity. These experiences can become unconscious scripts, shaping how people think about themselves, interpret others, and react under pressure.

Susan calls this the Unconscious Wounded Career Path®, a path marked by self-doubt, emotional overreactions, and limiting beliefs that quietly drive how people lead, collaborate, and perform. Without recognizing and dealing with these emotional legacies, mental health problems may persist, at home and at work.

The twist: not surprisingly, leaders also carry these unconscious wounds. And because leaders cast a long shadow—what Senn Delaney called the “shadow of the leader”—unexamined trauma in leaders may shape the emotional culture of entire organizations.

But work culture doesn’t have to be this way.

The Conscious Healing Career Path®: A New Way Forward

When leaders begin to recognize their own patterns and the patterns of others and step onto what Susan calls the Conscious Healing Career Path®, everything shifts. This path is marked by self-awareness, emotional agility, and courage to choose new responses instead of old reflexes. In Susan and Martha Finney’s book, Healing at Work: A Guide to Using Career Conflicts to Overcome Your Past and Build the Future You Deserve, they identify a powerful truth: the past doesn’t have to run our careers. This is true for leaders and employees.

When leaders step onto the Conscious Healing Career Path®, they increase mental health by quieting their inner critic, building confidence, and reframing workplace stress. In doing so, they turn workplaces into environments of growth and healing: modeling emotional regulation, delivering a positive employee experience, strengthening culture, and delivering stakeholder value (figure 1).

What we’re suggesting isn’t a therapy strategy or a replacement for therapy, which may be needed at times. We are identifying a strategic human development.

How Trauma Shows Up at Work: Recognizing the Symptoms

Trauma-driven behaviors often look like performance or personality problems, but they’re often patterns from the past, and they include symptoms listed in figure 2. This diagnostic can be used to determine when mental health concerns might be related to early childhood experiences.

These patterns often signal a Bumper Car Moment® where a present-day situation collides with unresolved emotions from the past. 

Conscious Actions for Healing-Promoting Workplaces

If leaders or employees have the symptoms in figure 2, we suggest six actions for improving mental health in the workplace.

1. Do Your Own Work First

Self-awareness is not optional. It’s the foundation of emotionally intelligent leadership. Leaders can use figure 2 to assess personal emotional triggers, identify which get in the way at work, and model overcoming them. As Daniel Goleman said, “If your emotional abilities aren’t in hand . . . you are not going to get very far.” Personal well-being is particularly important for HR professionals who are often caregivers for others. 

2. See the Pattern, Not Just the Problem

When workplace conflicts flare up (potentially indicative of mental health concerns), pause. Replace judgment with curiosity by asking:

• Is the emotional intensity proportionate to the issue?
• Could this be a Bumper Car Moment® (i.e., a workplace conflict) driven by past pain?

Look for patterns and patiently create space for more conscious responses.

3. Coach the Behavior, Not the Biography

Leaders are not therapists and don’t need to unpack childhood stories, but they can ask powerful coaching questions:

• What happened?
• How are you feeling?
• What are you most worried about?
• What would a productive next step look like?
• How can I support you?

Set clear expectations while supporting emotional awareness and accountability. This course of action is not therapy but responsible leadership. 

4. Create Healing-Centered Conditions

True psychological safety goes beyond platitudes. Build conditions that foster healing:

• Share personal learning and model vulnerability.
• Normalize coaching, mentoring, and mental health support.
• Empower employee relation groups (ERGs) and affinity spaces.
• Institutionalize mental health and well-being through open communication, positive performance accountability, psychological health care benefits, and personalized career paths.

5. Use Bumper Car Moments® for Growth

Every difficult interaction is a chance to practice emotional regulation, self-reflection, and leadership agility. Teach  teams tools like:

• The “Am I Sure?” Pause: This tool interrupts the spiral of assumption and catastrophizing. When the leader or the employee feels slighted or misunderstood, instead of reacting, pause and ask: “Am I sure this is about me?” This simple question helps reframe the moment, reduce emotional escalation, and open space for clarity and perspective.
• The People-Pleaser Reset: This move disrupts the reflexive “yes” that many with childhood trauma default to. Instead of automatically overcommitting, encourage employees to say: “Let me check my capacity and get back to you.” This sets boundaries with grace and builds self-respect and sustainability.
• The Strength Flip: This tool reframes past survival strategies as leadership strengths. For example, hyper-vigilance becomes strong pattern recognition, perfectionism becomes quality orientation, and emotional sensitivity becomes advanced empathy. These are not flaws; they are potential superpowers when consciously applied. 

6. Engage HR Early

When unresolved dynamics threaten outcomes, don’t wait. Partner with HR for:

• Facilitated dialogue.
• Performance conversations.
• Mentorship or coaching referrals.
• Sourcing more intense therapy to unravel deeper trauma. Qualified therapists have a “success” rate of about 75 percent, and HR can help determine and navigate this additional support.

 These six actions of conscious leadership improve mental health (higher trust and lower emotional drama), which shapes the employee experience (engagement, retention, and hope) and leads to positive stakeholder outcomes (figure 1).

Closing Reflection

Mental health has been, is, and will continue to be a key predictor of business success. Leaders who appreciate how their and others’ pasts show up in the present workplace and choose conscious growth over unconscious reaction will better manage mental health. Healing at Work® that starts with leaders and includes all employees becomes a powerful business and HR agenda.

Please continue the dialogue with how you heal and help others heal.

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Dave Ulrich is the Rensis Likert Professor at the Ross School of Business, University of Michigan, and a partner at The RBL Group, a consulting firm focused on helping organizations and leaders deliver value.