Where have all the manners gone?

I’m disheartened to admit that good manners are now, officially rare. They’re heading down the route of the Rhino and Dodo – exploited into extinction by man’s greed and selfishness.

Let’s be honest, we’ve pretty much trashed most of our forbearers social etiquette. We disengage from day-to-day niceties by burying our heads in our phones; violence is all too commonplace and cutting sarcasm or belittling others seems to be applauded. 

What the hell?

Before my thoughts rocket off into an uncontrollable rant, let me touch on a few examples.

-      How often do you use ‘please’ or ‘thank you’ or ‘excuse me’?

-      How often do switchboard operators leave a favourable impression?

-      How many clients / customers / friends respond to an important email within 24 hours, if at all?

-      How often do business associates return your call / message within 24 hours, if at all?

-      How often do cashiers smile and make you want to return to the store?

-      How often have you been rude or not made eye-contact with a server or employee?

-      How often have you opened the door for someone, or stood aside to let them go first?

-      How often are you late for meetings or social engagements?

It’s often the small things that build up to create a negative space. But isn’t there enough negativity? Demonstrating good manners reminds us to be aware of our environment and mindful of our actions. They slow us down a little, forcing us to consider the feelings of others. They remind us of how we like to be treated ourselves.

When you treat someone well, they generally enjoy the experience. Surely life is too short not to insert as much kindness as we can?

With the festive and holiday seasons upon us let’s make it a point to choose kindness over irritation; to smile and make eye-contact with strangers; to verbally acknowledge the efforts of others, to complement and encourage; and generally treat our fellow citizens well – regardless of their response or mood.

And if you’re still not convinced, perhaps these wonderful quotes will get you thinking ...

“Good manners will open doors that the best education cannot.” - Clarence Thomas

“Whoever one is, and wherever one is, one is always in the wrong if one is rude.” - Maurice Baring

“Good manners sometimes means simply putting up with other people’s bad manners.” - Eric Hoffer

“Politeness is the art of choosing among one’s real thoughts.” - Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Good manners are the social niceties that cement our society and prevent us from acting like a cage full of rabid baboons, squealing at the top of our lungs and touching ourselves inappropriately.” - Richard Bronson

Remember - how you treat others leaves an impression, for good or for bad. What lasting impression would you like to leave?

Madge Gibson - The Change Initiative (Pty) Ltd