Why big decisions are easier in the long run

Ever been on the edge of a big decision and thought, “Why do I feel like I’m about to ruin my entire life?” Yeah, you’re not alone. The emotional rollercoaster that comes with big choices isn’t a sign you’re doing it wrong—it’s a sign you’re doing something that matters. So, why do we expect clarity to come wrapped in comfort? Let’s talk about it.

I was talking with a client recently who was wrestling with a big decision. One of those career-changing, life-altering, “is-this-a-genius-move-or-a-terrible-mistake?” kinds of decisions. And as we talked, he kept circling back to the same thing:

“I feel anxious. I feel uncertain. I feel like I might be making the wrong choice.”

And then came the real analysis. He started examining the decision like a detective at a crime scene, looking for proof that his feelings were valid. He’d say things like:

• “I don’t know exactly how this will turn out—that must mean it’s too risky.”

• “I’m feeling unsure, so maybe that’s my gut telling me to stop.”

• “I keep thinking about all the ways this could go wrong—so maybe that means it will go wrong.”

It was like he was building a legal case against himself, with his own emotions as Exhibit A.

And that’s when it hit me: Expecting to make a big decision without fear, doubt, or anxiety is like expecting to run a marathon and feel zero exhaustion.

I mean, come on.

Nobody hits mile 22 of a marathon and thinks, Wow, I must not be cut out for this—I’m exhausted! No, exhaustion is baked into the process. It comes with the territory. And the same goes for fear and anxiety when you’re standing at the crossroads of a big decision.

But here’s where things get tricky: Instead of recognizing fear and uncertainty as normal, we tend to use them as evidence that we shouldn’t move forward. We mistake emotional discomfort for a red flag instead of just a natural byproduct of stepping outside our comfort zone.

But what if those feelings weren’t signs to turn back?

What if they were just part of the game? Like sweat, muscle fatigue, or that deep, soul-searching moment during a marathon where you wonder why you signed up in the first place.

What if the people who make the biggest, boldest moves aren’t the ones who don’t feel fear and anxiety—but the ones who expect it, plan for it, and move forward anyway?

So, the next time you’re standing in front of a big decision, tangled up in self-doubt and uncertainty, don’t go looking for comfort as proof that you’re on the right path. Expect the feelings. Let them come along for the ride. But don’t let them grab the wheel.

Because in the long run (see what I did there?), it’s not about avoiding discomfort—it’s about knowing that discomfort was always part of the deal… and deciding to keep running anyway.

-Christine