Why meaningful connection with others matters

As we approach Mental Health Awareness Week 2024 in New Zealand, with its theme "Community is... what we create together," I find myself reflecting on the vital role that meaningful connection plays in mental health. This year’s campaign highlights a truth we often overlook: strong communities aren’t just found, they’re built – through kindness, support and shared resilience. It’s a theme that resonates deeply with me, especially when I think about my own journey with PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) and depression, where isolation became both a symptom and a cause of my struggles.

Humans are social creatures; we thrive on feeling valued, supported and connected to others. Yet, so often those of us with mental health challenges feel the urge to withdraw from those around us. That’s what I did – I pulled away. At the time, I didn’t realise this only perpetuated my cycle of depression – the more I isolated, the worse I felt.

This is where community becomes essential. Social connection is one of our most basic needs. When we feel socially isolated, it can erode our sense of self and make life feel overwhelming. On the other hand, being supported by a community can give us the strength to face even the toughest challenges.

One thing I’ve learned is that connection is an inherently subjective experience. You can be surrounded by people – at work, in social settings, or even online – yet still feel profoundly lonely. It’s not the number of people in our lives that matters most, but the quality of the relationships we have. It’s about feeling seen, heard, and understood.

Creating a sense of belonging within a community starts with small but powerful steps. Here’s what has helped me:

Be kind

Kindness is a simple yet powerful way to build connection. Even small acts can improve your mental health by boosting your own spirits. Kindness releases oxytocin, the ‘connection hormone’, strengthening bonds and reminding you that you're part of a larger community.

Spend time with people who fill your emotional bucket

This has been a lifesaver for me. Whether in person or via video chat, spending time with people who uplift you is crucial. We all need those who bring positivity and make us feel happier just by being around. If you can’t meet in person, schedule a phone or video call. Regular catchups, even brief ones, help maintain that sense of connection.

Learn to talk about the tough stuff

One of the most valuable lessons I’ve learned is the importance of talking about the hard times, not just the good. When my mental health declined, opening up about the current hardships was difficult, but I soon realised how crucial it is to have a few trusted people to share the tough stuff with. Don’t rely on just one person; build a small network so you have multiple people to turn to and avoid placing too much responsibility on any one individual. Sharing your experiences – especially the difficult ones – is an act of courage. These brave conversations are what make a community truly strong.

Reach out when you feel disconnected

If you're feeling lonely or isolated, remember you're not alone. Mental health struggles can make us feel isolated, but friends, family or colleagues may be feeling the same. Reach out – letting someone know you're not fine can spark a meaningful conversation that helps both of you feel less alone.

As we embrace Mental Health Awareness Week, let’s remember that community is built through small acts of kindness, open conversations and reaching out. Whether in our family, workplaces or neighbourhoods, strong communities help us navigate tough times and lift each other up when needed.

Let’s all take a moment to connect with someone this week – whether through a simple act of kindness or an honest conversation – and help build the kind of community that uplifts everyone.

Meaningful workplace support

My Everyday Wellbeing is an award-winning wellbeing programme for workplaces, led by a passionate team. We cover anything and everything that contributes to building and maintaining a healthy lifestyle, which includes guidance on how to have courageous conversations, ensure that self-care remains a priority, where you can get support and so much much. Get in touch with Tim Mehrtens or Olivia Deadman to learn how we can support your staff and wellbeing leaders, while providing data driven insights on the health needs of your people.