Your Life Is a Result of Your Choices
Elizabeth Lykins, PA-C
Spiritual Transformation Coach~Best Selling Author~Medical Provider
Modern society conditions us to believe that the current state of our life is a direct result of the behavior of others around us; that external circumstances control us somehow. We are usually seeking someone else to blame when life does not turn out the way we planned.... our parents, our government leaders, our jobs, or events that occurred in our past. There is more than enough blame to go around and it is toxic. What most of us do not understand is that to have a better life, we must learn to make better choices.
Events that may have occurred in the past have no power over us in the present. No matter how horrible events may have been, once they are past, they can either become learning experiences stored in memory or we can allow these events to destroy our lives. That is our choice. What we DO with those events occurring around us and how we choose to THINK about them is paramount. If we allow external events to shape our present or future condition, we will live a life of confusion, anxiety, and develop a constant sense of dread and urgency. If we choose to resist being reactive, we can see that we do not have to allow our perception of events around us, to poison our thoughts.
Life truly is a result of the choices that we are making moment by moment. While it is true that all of us will have trials and tribulations in our lives from time to time, it is up to each of us, to not allow them to defeat us. As each of us begins to develop an understanding of the "inside-out" nature of life, we will begin to make better choices. No one has the ability to control the thoughts of another. That power belongs to each individual, regardless of external circumstances. Remembering that in the midst of chaos, will change everything.
Leadership Development, Coach and Coach Supervision Specialist at Insight-Out Training Consultants,
9yHi Elizabeth, I agree with your sentiments. A lovely echo of the work of Will Schutz (creator of the FIRO model) and his amazing Truth Option book. He believes that we choose everything: how we live and how we die. I get off the bus bit before that! There are some things that happen to us that to my mind we don't choose, but we do choose how we respond to them, and that is what I explore through my Choose You Project: http://insight-out.co.uk/choose-you-blog/ Thanks for sharing Elizabeth and sparking such an interesting conversation.
Retired
9yHappiness vs Futility may be a false dichotomy. To me, it's back to having the wisdom of knowing what we can't change. I would rather be pleasantly surprised by a positive outcome if expectations are kept modest than delude myself into maintaining I have the influence via my demeanor to affect what is and what's in store. The world has many souls who've been crushed by naive optimism. And the biggest cynics may be life's former great idealists and dreamers.
Spiritual Transformation Coach~Best Selling Author~Medical Provider
9yLife only works from the inside out, not the outside in. What that means is that we can believe that external circumstances control our life, but that does not mean that belief is true. One does not have to believe in gravity or that the earth orbits around the sun, yet the consequences of ignoring these principles are significant and will not negate their truth. Like the reality of gravity, free will is a principle that every being is granted, along with an inborn guidance system that has come from the creator/universe/god or whatever name we choose to call this formless entity. It is a gift that can be used to create happiness in each of our lives or used in a way to create a sense of futility. As for the exercise of my free will, I choose happiness.
Retired
9ySome degree of free will can co-exist with determinism. How much, as you say, is a matter of individual perception. Should two people meet and hit it off favorably, folks often say "it was meant to be," as in they were destined to meet regardless of prior paths or choices. Paths, if fated or "in the cards," will cross. However, to whole-heartedly believe we master our destinies, with all due respect, is a dubious premise. Harboring aspirations is fine. Constraints & God applies those may reflect a plan to override those desires and the sad illusion of control.
Spiritual Transformation Coach~Best Selling Author~Medical Provider
9yWe all have the ability to make choices, especially about how we perceive life. The best gift that has been given to each and every one of us as we arrive into this world, is that of free will and choice. We do not have to do anything to deserve it. It is freely given by the creator of us all.