Strategies For Addressing Client Resistance

How Do You Talk About a Problem Without Creating One? Sometimes the hardest part of solving a problem… is talking about it. We’ve all been there: we see a risk, a concern, or a challenge that needs to be addressed - but we know if we come at it too directly, the other person may get defensive, resistant, or shut down entirely. So how do you raise the issue without making it an issue? Here’s a simple 3-step approach my coaching clients have found effective: 1. ALIGN ON THE OBJECTIVE Start by aligning on the higher-level shared outcome you both care about. ➡️ “I want to make sure this partnership is successful for both of us.” ➡️ “What matters most to me is that we enjoy this trip together.” ➡️ “I really value our relationship and want to keep building trust.” 2. SHARE THE CONCERN Identify the risk or challenge you see - without blame. This isn’t about what you want, it’s about an issue that could get in the way of the shared goal you both want to achieve. ➡️ “One thing I’m concerned about is that we may have different perspectives on timing.” ➡️ “I’m wondering if we might have different priorities, and I don’t want that to derail us.” 3. INVITE COLLABORATION Ask the other person to help solve it. This shows trust and humility, lowers resistance, gives them power, and reduces resistance. ➡️ “How do you think we could make sure we stay aligned?” ➡️ “Do you have ideas for how we can navigate that?” At Echelon Front, we refer to this as the INDIRECT APPROACH. It isn’t just about conflict avoidance - it’s about influence, humility, and partnership. It keeps the focus on the long-term objective and shows that you’re not trying to control the conversation - you’re trying to collaborate through it. Leadership isn't about having the best answers. It’s about creating the conditions for the best outcomes. #Leadership #Communication #Trust #EmotionalIntelligence #ConflictResolution

Many leaders are competent in preparing for a meeting or conversation. They have a plan with clear goals and objectives and what they must do to achieve them. That’s great - preparation is critical. But it’s not just about what we need to do. We should also consider our intentions for how we will show up, especially when debate and conflict are expected. Our energy as leaders affects the energy of the room, especially when considering a situation where a team is up against an obstacle. As we’re preparing, we can get curious and ask ourselves a series of questions: -> How might I show up to keep us centered on the purpose? -> How might I ensure mutual respect amid disagreement so that everyone makes each other feel seen, heard, and supported? -> How might I remain calm and receptive to the collective truth, with my individual beliefs being a piece of the puzzle? -> How might I seek to build a genuine connection despite any tension? -> How might I create a flowing conversation where it's easy to provide input and push back on areas that seem off base? -> How might I uplift others? A practical example: ____ Let’s say we’re going into a meeting with a client whom we know is frustrated due to consistently missed deadlines. Our meeting objective is to align strategies to overcome the diversion from the original plan and get back on track. However, we know that with the inherent tension, the meeting outcome is more likely if we start by ensuring the client feels seen, heard, and supported: 𝐒𝐞𝐞𝐧 Acknowledge the truth - we missed deadlines, understand there is frustration present, and we’d like to work together to get back on track collectively. 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐝 Ask for feedback - allow the client to share their perspective and affirm the truth. Be accountable without explaining or justifying what led to the current situation. 𝐒𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐝 Lay the facts on the table - align the truths of the current situation and work collaboratively with the client to create a plan for course correction that addresses their concerns and meets their needs. ____ We set the intention on how we show up for the client in alignment with our values and principles (lead with who we are). Once the frustration is diffused and concerns are addressed, we move productively toward achieving the meeting objective (what we need to do). I’ve seen this work repeatedly in challenging discussions when leading with candor, transparency, and accountability. Absent of the intention in how we show up, the opposite course of action is the natural tendency to defend our team and engage in problem-solving. However, trust is hard to build when we seek to defend and justify our position. This all leads to reactivity, randomness, blame, and the victim mindset - an indication of the lack of self-leadership. Choose to set the intention beforehand and lead with who you are. ____ How do you prepare ahead of challenging circumstances? #saturdayreflection

If you’ve been an accounting firm owner long enough, you’ve probably received a threatening email from a client or former client to be.  I know I have- sometimes for something we did (or didn’t do) and sometimes for something completely the fault of the client.  Regardless of who did or didn’t do what, how you respond will greatly dictate the results of the issue and how painful it becomes.  I had all ends of the spectrum from a client acknowledging their mistake to litigation. To start with, you don’t win a client crisis in the inbox. You win it with speed, structure, and calm conversation(s).  I’ve had the unfortunate experience of learning and watching a 14 reply email thread make things worse.  Ignoring or procrastinating the issue will generally make things worse as well although there can sometimes be benefits to giving those involved time to cool down.     This is what I’ve found worked best over the years if you find yourself in this situation, do this as soon as you can:: -If error and omission exposure is possible, notify your carrier and get guidance.  -Acknowledge the issue and schedule a live call as soon as you can that week.. -Stop the back-and-forth emails until that meeting. -Pull the timeline, scope, deliverables, and messages. You need to understand the facts as well as feelings. -If it appears potential for litigation, start an incident log documenting all communications and preserve every record.  Stop communicating internally electronically on the matter. As soon as you can: -Meet live. Clarify expectations vs scope. Define what acceptable resolution means. -Offer a narrow make right approach if warranted. Keep it specific and time bound. -Document and confirm next steps in an email after the call.   Within 5 days: -Diagnose, identify, and fix the root cause of the issue, not just the symptom. Examples would be tightening a checklist, review step, or handoff. -Review similar clients for the same failure point. -Decide your fee stance. Only discount if it buys closure and learning. -Close the loop with a short lessons learned note to the client and your team. In short, meet fast, map facts, make it right, then make it better. Often, top-notch handling of issues can result in stronger client / firm relationships.  What would you add from your playbook and/or experience?

Yesterday I was on a call and a dispute over a SOC 2 audit finding got borderline unprofessional. The crux of the issue wasn't the audit finding itself (both parties actually agreed with the basic facts), but rather how the conversation went down. And after 2000+ engagements here are a few tools to handle conflicts like these. 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗖𝗢𝗡𝗩𝗘𝗥𝗦𝗔𝗧𝗜𝗢𝗡 Consultant: Explains audit finding. Client: I agree, but it is so low risk we should just call it an opportunity for improvement (OFI) and not include it in the formal report. Consultant: I agree it's low risk, but it is an exception from the control, so I have to include it in the report. Client: Further defends why it's low risk. Consultant: Goes on to explain 5 ways client could have avoided the issue. Client (Voice Raised): Are you willing to fight me on this? Consultant (Intensity matched): Yes. 𝗛𝗢𝗪 𝗜𝗧 𝗪𝗘𝗡𝗧 𝗕𝗔𝗗 1. Because a challenge was issued (and accepted) it didn't leave either party much room to save face. That never turns out well. 2. In fairness to the auditor, this was a pretty cut and dry finding. In fairness to the client, it was not socialized in advance and caught a lot of people off guard. 3. This was a routine meeting for the auditor, but the client felt like it was career ending. 𝗖𝗢𝗔𝗖𝗛𝗜𝗡𝗚 It is worth saying that this conversation was between two decent and competent people who would otherwise get along great. Yet, this is a situation that happens all the time with security, audit, and GRC pros. There's just a lot of conflict to navigate in this career and we have to learn to do it. So, here are a few tools I've seen work to find resolution and avoid escalating: 𝟭. 𝗔𝘀𝗸 𝗾𝘂𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻'𝘀 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗽𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 - Do both parties agree on the facts? - Do both parties understand the options (eg. Change control language, add a management response)? - Are there hidden factors (eg someone's job or reputation on the line)? Seek first to understand. Always. 𝟮. 𝗚𝗲𝘁 𝗮 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗿𝗱 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁𝘆 𝗶𝗻𝘃𝗼𝗹𝘃𝗲𝗱 Sometimes a trusted third party will see things more clearly, or at least have a voice both parties respect. Try saying something like: "I can see this is important to both of us, let's pull in Christian and see if he can add some perspective that helps. Is that ok with you?" 𝟯. 𝗦𝗹𝗲𝗲𝗽 𝗼𝗻 𝗶𝘁 Create some space to cool off. Try saying: "This is too important for me to answer on the fly. I really need some time to think on this one. Would it be okay if I sleep on it and give you a detailed response tomorrow?" 𝟰. 𝗗𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗶𝘁 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 If someone starts to get emotional or lobs a verbal punch your way - just remind yourself there's probably something going on in their life you don't see. A bad day. A personal issue. Who knows. I often use that as a mental trick to summon a little more patience. --- Good luck out there!

WHEN TEMPERS FLARE, YOU'RE LOCKED IN A STALEMATE, OR A MULTI MILLION DOLLAR DEAL IS ON THE LINE, EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION IS THE KEY TO TURNING IT AROUND. The right communication framework fosters understanding, strengthens relationships, and drives powerful results within your team. Both personally and professionally, effective communication is key to successful teamwork, conflict resolution, and collaboration. From construction to finance, from fashion to family offices, my high performance clients master the skills to navigate the toughest conversations and transform them into their biggest breakthroughs. And here’s how you can do it too: 1. FRAME THE POSITIVE INTENTION: Start with shared goals. Establish a shared purpose to align your conversation positively and maintain the focus on optimal outcomes. ➡️”We both want [a positive, uplifting relationship].” “This is about us being [happier, more productive].” A positive start encourages cooperation and a safe space for communication. 2. DESCRIBE THE OBSERVABLE: Present facts without emotional interpretation. Focus on specific events or behaviors rather than feelings. ➡️ “When [specific event] happened, I saw [specific observation].” Stick to observable facts and avoid personal interpretations to keep the conversation neutral. 3. SHARE THE FEELING: Express your emotions without blame. Own your feelings without blaming others, and invite the other person to share theirs. ➡️“We both feel [emotion].” “I feel [emotion] about [situation].” Take ownership of your feelings. Express them without pointing fingers and encourage others to do the same. 4. REQUEST THEIR PERSPECTIVE: Invite input and collaboration. Ask for the other person’s perspective to gain insight into their viewpoint. ➡️“How did you see that?” “What did you observe?” Listen actively and be open to hearing the other person’s thoughts, fostering mutual understanding. 5. MAKE THE ASK WITH BENEFIT EXTENSIONS Propose mutually beneficial solutions: Offer choices that meet both parties' needs. ➡️ “If [action] occurs, we would feel [emotion] and [emotion].” “Here are two options that work for me…” Present two acceptable options to empower the other person to contribute to the solution. 6. WORK TOGETHER TO BUILD A CONSENSUS Collaborate on finding the best solution: Work together to determine the best course of action and express appreciation when a decision is made. ➡️ “I appreciate the thought you’ve put into this. I’m glad we agreed on [decision].” By applying my effective communication framework, you foster open, respectful communication that builds trust, enhances collaboration, and contributes to team success. And the great news is that you can use this both personally and professionally! I’m curious… ~When was a time that you needed this framework in your life? #future #communication #success