All Humor is not good.
Robin Sheader
Owner at Risk Management Systems LLC. Connecting employees to the business
Do we fix the Slap, the bad joke or the Culture that caused it to happen?
There have been lots of messages about the Will Smith slapping of Chris Rock at the Oscars. The last article I saw was that the Academy is thinking about sanctioning Will Smith. While I cannot disagree with that, I am disappointed that they are not considering a sanction for Chris Rock and appalled that they did not accept blame for the entire incident.
For a comedian, or anyone, to make fun of Jada Pinkett Smith’s shaved head when it is the result of a health condition is absolutely appalling. For the Academy to create and support a culture that not only condones but encourages such ill chosen, comments for the sake of ratings is inexcusable.
As leaders we need to understand that:
1. There are times, when “good” humor can, diffuse a situation, lift others up, and open doors to further dialogue. However, this can often backfire. Trying to make light of the situation can sometimes be interpreted as belittling the other viewpoint.
2. Although we all love good humor, the truth is all humor is not good. Humor is only funny when it is enjoyed by both parties.
3. To use humor to mock, belittle, undermine, or attack isn’t good humor, and it’s certainly not good leadership. The recipient of your attempt at humor may well shed a silent tear behind their public smile.
4. An attempt at bad humor is not an acceptable excuse for unacceptable behavior or poor leadership. Discriminatory behavior won’t be tolerated because you attempted to cloak it in bad humor.
5. When we are the targets, we may pay the price of a lack of self-esteem, a feeling of anxiety, or loss of spirit or motivation.
6. When we are on the sidelines listening and observing, we may feel that our personal integrity has been eroded. If we laugh at negative humor, we are tacitly agreeing with the joke teller and buying in to his or her point of view. If we don’t laugh, we risk being excluded or the butt of the next joke. Over time, it can strip us of our sensitivity, empathy, and compassion.
There is so much blame to be shared in this incident. How did we ever get to a place when it is socially acceptable to demine someone with an illness and expect everyone else in the room to laugh?
There is a lot to be learned from this incident, for any leader trying to establish a culture of trust and mutual respect.
Don’t fall into the trap of trying to be a comedian rather than a leader.
People Partner at Colonial Pipeline Company
3yNice article Rob!
I totally agree. I am shocked at the lack of negative consequences for Chris Rock. Instead he gets a boost to ticket sales. Shame!
Everyone Deserves to be Led Well
3yGreat article Rob! This should make us all pause. Culture is nothing more than the culmination of accepted behaviors, common symbols and functional systems. For organizations it is the outward display of how they respond to these items. It begins with what they accept on the daily basis, how they reward their teams and the perceived fairness of the leadership. These messages tell us what is valued in an organization, again, behavior, symbols and systems. Everything matters. Be intentional.
Owner at Risk Management Systems LLC. Connecting employees to the business
3ySome of our best teachers are bad behaviors. The root cause here is the terrible culture and acceptance of bad vindictive humor..
Manufacturing Manager at American Biltrite Inc. Tape Products Division
3yYour thoughts on the incident resonate. The first thought I had was I can’t believe it took this long for an incident like this to happen. The monologue comedians have delivered year after year at this event are filled with character assassination at the expense of those in attendance. Comedians constantly pushing the envelope of that type of humor. I am truly surprised it took this long for someone to have their fill. I have no allegiance to either party. They were both wrong. I honestly haven’t watched the program in years as it gives a microphone to a few which gives them the ability to further their own agendas. Much can be learned about how not to act here.