The Emotionally Intelligent CEO

Over the years, I’ve faced moments that tested me deeply—like the time a staff member’s come to work with a stab wound from a domestic dispute. Or when two senior team members clashed over a project and came to me expecting an immediate verdict. In the past, I would’ve picked a side on instinct or tried to fix everything in the moment. But leadership has taught me that sometimes the best thing you can do is pause. Step back. Ask questions. Listen. Do your due diligence. And then respond—calmly, fairly, and from a place of reflection rather than reaction.

The truth is, as leaders, our reactions set the tone for our entire organisation. When we overreact, we risk being seen as unstable or overly emotional. When we underreact, it can look like we’re avoiding hard conversations or don’t care. And people notice. They mirror us. Eventually, how we show up emotionally becomes part of the culture.

Emotions Belong at Work—With Boundaries

I’ve come to believe that emotions absolutely do have a place in the workplace—just not an unchecked, unfiltered one.

The first step for me has been accepting that being emotional doesn't mean being weak. In fact, it can be a strength—when handled well. Empathy, for instance, has become one of the most valuable leadership tools I have. I’ve learned to lean into it more, especially when dealing with people. Trying to understand where someone is coming from, or what’s underneath their frustration, often reveals far more than what they’re saying on the surface.

Empathy + Judgment = Trust

Empathetic leadership has become more recognised over the years—and rightly so. It creates room for vulnerability, safety, and connection. But it has to be paired with sound judgment. It’s not about being overly soft or giving in to every emotional plea. It’s about acknowledging feelings while also holding people accountable, making clear decisions, and staying grounded in what’s best for the business and the team.

The Power of the Pause

Another tool that’s helped me is learning to pause. This doesn’t always come naturally, especially when you're passionate or under pressure. But pausing gives you space to breathe, assess, and process before responding. Whether it’s taking a walk, journaling for a few minutes, or simply saying, “Let me think about this and get back to you”—creating that buffer has saved me from many knee-jerk responses I would’ve regretted later.

Use Emotions as Data, Not Instructions

I’ve also learned to treat emotions as data, not directives. Feelings are signals. They’re trying to tell us something—whether it’s that a boundary has been crossed, or that something needs more attention. But they shouldn’t automatically dictate our actions. They’re part of the picture, not the whole thing.

Emotional Regulation Is a Leadership Skill

And then there’s emotional regulation—arguably one of the hardest but most important skills to develop. I still catch myself at times about to react emotionally in the middle of a meeting or email. But I try to pause, ask myself, “What is really happening here?” “What would a wise version of me do?” It’s not about bottling up. It’s about choosing my response consciously, rather than being hijacked by my feelings.

Of course, I haven’t perfected it. I still have moments where my emotions get the better of me. We all do. But the difference now is I recover faster. I reflect, apologise if I need to, and I use those moments as learning tools—for myself and for my team.

Lead With Heart, But Don’t Let It Run the Show

We’re not robots. We’re human beings with hearts, pressures, passions, and flaws. And I’ve found that being human—while still holding high standards—is what builds trust. What makes people feel safe. What creates the kind of culture where people can thrive.

As women, especially, we’ve often been told to “toughen up,” to not show too much emotion. But the reality is, when used wisely, our emotional intelligence is our superpower. It allows us to lead with compassion, make better decisions, and navigate the complexities of people and teams with grace.

So no, emotions don’t need to be exiled from the workplace. But they do need to be understood, managed, and aligned with our values and vision as leaders.

We don’t need to be cold to be credible. We just need to be conscious.