Are you holding Space for HOPE?

Many of us struggle to hold space for our emotions, I am one of those many. Now holding space doesn't mean be consumed by it instead recognising is this leaving me in a state of resourcefulness or non-resourcefulness has been helpful guidance. Taking action from that place helps set momentum.

My most recent human experience left me feeling uncertain again, I thought there was rhythm only to be disrupted soon.

…and the next thing I know is I am in state of overwhelm, unable to function. There was worry.

Vulnerability.

All of this was real.

Why am I sharing?

Because our #wellbeing matters the most and it's about finding your centre.

Any time we have emotional turbulence we upset our natural internal balance and we get in our own way. Now this is not to say that emotions in themselves are harmful or to be avoided, as human beings we will always have emotions, this is part of human condition. How we navigate so we don’t get stuck with one emotion or over-identify with the problem becomes much more important.

Yes, there was overwhelm. But there was also HOPE, I have certain words I tune into often. We need HOPE like we need Air and on this platform ✨Susan LePlae Miller would often reference this as part of her writing here because that is her essence too.

HOPE has been my word to regain my balance. Something that I kept repeating to myself is-Stay CALM you have been through this before. You will get through this again.

However, despite that every time a feeling showed up, there was resistance, judgement, distraction. I noticed the distress building up turning into physical pain in the body and a psychological warfare. The spasms were telling. This was my invitation for growth, to lean into my discomfort, without needing to fix it and I was keen on ‘RELEASE’. Now don't take this advice to not seek expert intervention. I am not a doctor. I am sharing my experience on how I process my BIG emotions. It is perspective sharing exercise.

SO

I took charge to follow where I was overextending and why was I doing it? How was I rationalising this? It is interesting to note in your effort to be seen if you don't have boundaries you can soon turn invisible.

In my case, the resentment was a clear indicator for change. Many of our relationships turn sour because we fail to hold direct respectful conversations, be it at work or home or with our circle of friends. Yes, you got this, not every relationship battles need attention but how do we address the ones that are important?

My intention has been to 'Let Go', which means carry less resentments in the relationships that matter. It is powerful to recognise our intentions are our desires without attachments. I am starting to see why this works so magically.

YES

It was time to have that conversation. There was no unseeing it.

But I was clear with yet another intention about MUTUAL respect. An insight that became my saviour was ‘Conflict is not the absence of peace but the PRESENCE OF PURPOSE. I get to thank Sapna Bakshi for that piece of writing here on LinkedIn that left a positive imprint and I made that my own.

Here is an actionable framework that could help us drive change so we get comfortable holding conversations.

1) Start from a place of mutual respect.

2) Speak to share a message, not to change minds.

3) Be Present and Listen with Intention. Avoid participating in the conversation to dismiss or silence the other participants.

4) Set boundaries and Respect boundaries. Remember that tough conversations can happen in moments of calm instead of stress.

5) Be patient with yourself and others.

Source-Blair Imani

This framework helps me stay solution focussed. Also, whenever I am in a conflict situation, I ask myself what role am I playing in this conflict? This has truly been my approach to stay open minded and remind myself I am capable of change.Yes, open minded is yet another powerful word and I am grateful to Sharon Chow for further seeding that thought.

It is easy to see things as random but it is amazing to recognise how miraculous each moment can be. Yes, I am the girl who journals and prayers and I am committed to my practices to take care of my mental health habits. Do you resort to everyday rituals to prioritise mental health?

It helps to register each time you hold space for your emotions, you get a sense for your state of mind and by changing your thoughts you get to make better choices. For instance-When we feel wronged anger is the emotion, our state is that of contempt, hate, dehumanisation, self-righteousness. I don't think I have been very productive in that state. Are you?

Keeping that in context a book I often reference is 'Atlas of the Heart', so I can give my expressions a language that is healthy and constructive. Brene Brown takes us on a journey through eighty-seven emotions and experiences that define what it means to be human.

SynchroDestiny by Deepak Chopra teaches me how I can unpack my earthly lessons with ease. Some of Sutra statements in this book leave me feeling elated in relation to how we can harness emotional turbulence.

- Imagine that you have left behind forever, any sense of anger or resentment.

- Imagine that you are never drawn into melodrama or hysteria.

- Imagine that you are free from blaming, free from feeling blame or guilt.

- Imagine that you can set any goal you want to achieve and actually achieve it.

Read it, say it aloud, feel it in your body and say it often.

YAY!

I am grateful I get to share my lessons and drive clarity at the level of the collective.

Let's Be Present, Be Mindful, Be Kind

AND by Holding Space for HOPE we are doing our part to Be Heard, Be Seen, Be Understood allowing others to do the same.