How to Master the Art of Giving a Compliment (And Why It Matters)

There are few things more powerful in business or life than a well-timed, sincere compliment.

I’ve seen it open doors, start conversations, strengthen relationships and shift the entire energy of a room. It’s a small gesture with an outsized impact. But for something so simple, it’s surprising how many people hesitate to do it.

Compliments aren’t just about making someone feel good. They’re about paying attention. They’re about seeing people. And in a world where so many people feel overlooked or undervalued, that alone can make you stand out.

A compliment is a tool. A relationship builder. A trust signal. A way to lead with generosity and connection. When done well, it can help you build goodwill, expand your network and deepen client relationships. It doesn’t cost anything. And it doesn’t require special training. But like most things, it takes intention.

Why Compliments Work

At the core, compliments work because people want to be seen and appreciated. That doesn’t change in professional settings. In fact, it’s often more meaningful there because people are used to being evaluated, not praised.

Compliments disarm people (in a good way). They shift people out of defense mode. They open people up. When someone feels recognized, they feel safe. And safe people are more likely to trust you, share with you and engage with you.

In my own work, I’ve used compliments as an entry point more times than I can count. I once started a client relationship with a simple note saying how much I admired an article the person had written. That conversation turned into a lunch. That lunch turned into a pitch. That pitch turned into long-term work. It didn’t feel transactional. It felt natural because it was.

When compliments are rooted in truth, they’re powerful. When they’re just flattery, they fall flat. The difference is whether you actually mean it.

The Right Way to Give a Compliment

Not all compliments are created equal. The best ones are specific. They’re personal. And they reflect that you were paying attention.

It’s the difference between “Great presentation” and “The way you explained that concept made it really easy to understand. I’ve never heard it framed that way before.”

One is nice. The other is memorable.

Here are a few principles I follow when it comes to giving compliments:

• Be sincere. If you don’t mean it, don’t say it. People can tell.
• Be specific. The more tailored the compliment, the more impact it has.
• Be timely. Don’t wait too long. A compliment loses weight if it’s delayed.
• Be generous. Don’t hold back just because you assume they already know. They might not.

Compliment something beyond the obvious. Everyone praises job titles and big wins. Compliment the clarity of their thinking, the way they brought the room together, the calm under pressure, the smart question they asked.

This applies to everyone around you. Not just senior leaders. Compliment your assistant. The new hire. The person who made your slides look great. People remember who acknowledged them.

Personal Story: A Compliment That Changed How I Lead

Back when I was early in my career, I was putting together a client presentation that needed to be turned around quickly. I stayed late pulling everything together, fine-tuning the message and visuals, and making sure every slide made sense. At the time, I didn’t expect anyone to notice. I was just doing what needed to be done.

A day later, a senior colleague pulled me aside—not in a meeting or in an email, but casually in the hallway. She said, “You made this better. The way you connected the story helped us tell the client exactly what they needed to hear.”

It wasn’t flashy. It wasn’t performative. But it was personal and clear. And it stuck with me.

That compliment made me realize that noticing details and taking the time to shape a message really did matter. It pushed me to keep doing that work, even when no one was watching. And now, years later, I try to do the same for others—point out what they did well and why it mattered. Because sometimes that one moment of acknowledgment can shape how someone sees their own value. at a firm who was sharp, serious and not someone who gave out compliments easily. I had helped on a pitch deck and stayed late to make sure it was client-ready.

The next morning, he sent me a note. Four words: “This was really strong.”

It wasn’t long. It wasn’t flowery. But I knew he meant it. And it meant a lot. I worked even harder after that. Not because I wanted more compliments, but because I felt seen.

That’s the thing about compliments. When done right, they motivate. They inspire loyalty. They raise the bar.

How Compliments Help You Build Your Business

Compliments have a ripple effect. They build rapport. They start conversations. They make you more approachable.

I’ve had people reach out after I left a comment on their LinkedIn post saying I liked how they framed an idea. That comment turned into a DM. The DM turned into a call. You get the picture.

The compliment isn’t the goal. The relationship is. But the compliment is often the gateway.

This matters even more if you’re in business development, marketing, client service or leadership. People are drawn to those who lift others up.

When you compliment someone in a room full of people, you’re not just speaking to them. You’re showing everyone else who you are and how you operate.

It signals generosity. It signals that you’re paying attention. It makes people want to work with you.

Making Compliments a Habit

Compliments shouldn’t just happen when you remember or when it’s easy. They should be part of how you move through the world. Here’s how to build that habit:

• Think about the last meeting you were in. Who said something that moved the conversation forward? Reach out and tell them.
• If you read something that taught you something new, email the author. Let them know.
• Keep a short list each week of people who helped you get something done. Thank them.
• When someone gives you advice or insight that helps you, go back and tell them how it made a difference.
• After events or webinars, follow up with speakers from whom you learned with something specific about what they shared.

Look at your daily interactions. Every time someone teaches you something, helps you solve a problem or makes your work better, that’s a moment worth acknowledging.

Where to Look for Compliments

Still not sure where to start? Look at:

Something someone said in a meeting that stuck with you How someone handled a stressful situation The thoughtfulness behind someone’s email or feedback The clarity of their writing Their kindness or ability to listen The way they advocated for someone else The work someone put in behind the scenes

You don’t have to know someone well to compliment them. In fact, that makes it even more powerful. It shows you noticed anyway.

What to Avoid

There’s a line between a compliment and flattery. One feels earned. The other feels off.

Avoid overly generic compliments. Avoid complimenting appearance in a professional setting unless it’s clearly appropriate. Don’t give a compliment just to get one back.

And don’t force it. If nothing comes to mind, stay quiet. Compliments work best when they’re natural and genuine.

Start Complimenting Today

A compliment can break the ice, rebuild trust or lift someone’s day. It can turn a routine interaction into a meaningful one. People remember how you made them feel, and often that feeling starts with something as small as a kind word.

This isn’t about flattery or empty praise. It’s about showing people that they matter. The next time you notice something good, say it. The right compliment at the right time can open a door, spark a conversation or strengthen a relationship. That’s worth the effort. a moment of connection in an otherwise transactional world. It can shift the tone of a conversation, rebuild momentum after a loss or give someone a reason to feel proud of something they didn’t think anyone noticed.

There’s a reason people remember compliments years later. It’s not just the words. It’s how they felt when they heard them.

Take the time. Pay attention. Say the thing you’re thinking instead of keeping it to yourself.

It may not seem like much, but it could be the thing that changes everything.

A Cheat Sheet to Mastering the Art of Giving a Compliment

What Makes a Compliment Land

• It’s specific
• It’s sincere
• It’s timely
• It’s generous
• It’s earned

Where to Look for Strong Compliments

• Something thoughtful or insightful someone said in a meeting
• How someone handled a tough moment or navigated pressure
• The structure, clarity or impact of their writing or presentation
• A behind-the-scenes contribution that made a difference
• The way someone showed up for a colleague
• A smart question, helpful suggestion or meaningful intro
• The tone or approach they brought to a difficult conversation
• The way they led, listened or lifted others

Better Compliment Examples Instead of “Great job” Try: “The way you broke that down helped everyone understand the issue clearly. You moved the conversation forward.”

Instead of “Nice presentation” Try: “You organized your ideas in a way that made it easy to follow and hard to forget. It stood out.”

Instead of “You’re helpful” Try: “You consistently see what people need before they ask. That level of thoughtfulness makes a big impact.”

How to Make Compliments Part of Your Routine

• End each week by thanking someone who helped you
• After meetings, follow up with one person who stood out
• If a colleague teaches you something or offers insight, acknowledge it
• Follow up with writers or speakers whose work stayed with you
• Keep a weekly list of people who made your day or week easier and let them know

How to Receive a Compliment Gracefully

This matters just as much as giving one.

• Don’t deflect or downplay it
• Don’t rush to compliment the person back out of habit
• Accept it with a simple “Thank you, I appreciate that”
• Let it land. Let it matter.
• And if the compliment stayed with you, follow up later and say why

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