I Choose You: Intergenerational and Reverse Mentorship

I’ve shared a lot about the mentors, sponsors and allies I’ve been blessed to have throughout my life and career. Resilient trailblazers, glass-ceiling breakers and fearless leaders who committed themselves to sharing their well-earned wisdom and lived experiences with me as I navigated my personal and professional journey. And even though some of them have left this world, I am where I am – and who I am – because of their guidance, nurturing, tough love and support. In hindsight, they believed in me before I had fully believed in myself.

I’ve experienced firsthand and can attest to the transformative power of mentorship and its impact on one’s life; and so, I made a commitment to pay it forward to others. One of them is my mentee Marcus Hunter, a 20-year-old student at the University of Minnesota . Our story began when I met Marcus at the age of 12 at a peace walk in the aftermath of shootings on the Northside of Minneapolis.

At that time, Marcus had seen and experienced a lot in his young life – frankly, more than any kid should. As I spoke with Marcus and got to know him, I felt and saw his potential, resilience, curiosity and, perhaps, even a little bit of myself in him. I’d never had a mentee that young, and I knew going into it that Marcus could learn a lot from my husband, Bill, and me, and we would learn a lot from him. A true reverse mentorship. After all, as I like to say, we all have something to teach and something to learn.

Simply put, we chose each other. Marcus chose us to be a pair of caring adults in his life, guiding and mentoring his journey into adulthood. And we chose him so that we could help him know his value and realize his aspirations. He’s taught us so much, including resiliency and an authentic perspective on what it’s like growing up as a young Black man in Minneapolis.

Being his mentors has been a blessing and reward for Bill and me. We know his story is still being written and believe the best is yet to come. And we’re going to continue to walk alongside him on his journey.

In this installment of Lessons From The C-suite, I’m going to turn the pen over to Marcus to reflect on how mentoring has shaped his outlook on his life, career and future. He offers some helpful advice for mentees. Enjoy!

We All Have Something to Learn

By Marcus Hunter

It’s really an honor for me to talk about my experience with Laysha and Bill. My thoughts on mentorship have really evolved over the past nine years. Looking back, I definitely didn’t know what mentorship was at first. Even as a kid, I was amazed at the lives other people were living...they provided for their families, went on vacations, and were surrounded by a community of friends and family that supported them. I also saw people, including loved ones, involved in drug dealing and being part of gangs and activities that I didn’t want to be associated with. I wanted my life to be different but I didn’t know how.

Up to that point in my life, everything was conditional. Like if I didn’t do what I was told, then I was going to be kicked out of the house. That concept was embedded in my mind, and it was hard for me to believe that unconditional support existed. Laysha and Bill helped me overcome that and taught me the importance of unconditional love, compassion and forgiveness. And most of all to embrace my differences from other people instead of trying to fit in. That’s when I knew I could trust them and that they were more than mentors and caring adults. They were like the family I wanted but would later realize, I needed.

Throughout my mentorship, I’ve learned that communication and networking are currency. I treat everyone with respect because we need to lean on one another in this world. It also means being there and supporting my friends who are also trying to find a sense of direction and what they want to do with their lives.

As I’ve gotten older, I can look back and appreciate all the things I’ve learned and the confidence I’ve gained to be who I am. I’m happy to share some of my learnings that will hopefully help other young people:

•  No one can do it alone. We all need help.
• Be open minded and willing to learn from constructive feedback. It may feel like criticism, but when delivered with the right intent you can learn a lot.
• Express your opinions and don’t be afraid to push back and say, “I hear what you’re saying, but I respectfully disagree and here’s why...”
• Expect advice and support from your mentors, not just on “scheduled” times, but in “real-time” moments because life happens 24/7.
• Your lived experience can be a lesson for your mentors, too.

Laysha and Bill have helped me understand the importance of writing my own story. Through my mentorship, I’ve been able to discover and see the potential within myself and others. I want to finish college, explore a career in real estate and become a personal trainer. And I eventually want to start my own nonprofit and give back...not just to the community I came from, but to kids all over. Paying it forward is what I aspire to do, now that I understand what it means to have aspirations and believe in myself and my future.