The New Year No BS Guide

New year, new you? With the freshness of January, it’s a time of reflection, new motivations and some conscious self-work. Below is a public declaration of goals for 2017 as well as a No BS Guide to help you get started with your goals this year.

Almost everyone that I spoke to in the last few months have said that 2016 ‘was a shit year, with high highs but with the lowest lows’… by the end of 2016 literally almost everyone I knew was totally wiped out. Isn’t it amazing how we’re all on the same page like that? It definitely made me feel like I wasn’t alone but also I’m just not that special either. And then when you look at the things that happened globally - it would appear that the whole world has gone topsy-turvy. So in the break of a new year, I (along with many others) sighed a big breath of relief knowing that 2016 was behind and it was time to embrace the freshness and excitement of a clean slate and a new year. 

Which of course got me thinking about ‘resolutions’. Part of the ‘heaviness’ of resolutions is around the fact that most of the time we don’t actually achieve them, which leads to disappointment and dissatisfaction. We start off with high hopes for the new year, only to find ourselves back in the same place 12 months later. Quite the vicious cycle which is not helping with our happiness or fulfilment. So this year instead of having resolutions, I am making three life changes (and this is the important part) with an action plan to actually achieve them. Just three, no more, no less. With this little experiment I hope to actually achieve all 3, and by listing them out publicly here, I am making myself accountable to you and to me.  

1. Patience - I will master the art of patience. 

I have a very bad habit of spiralling down very quickly when too many things 'appear' to not be going my way or haven’t met my high expectations. On reflection, I have realised that everything that has happened has ended up for the best, and at the very least I learnt a valuable lesson. Therefore I will not stress myself out or get overwhelmed and instead breath and practise patience. To make this happen, when I feel stressed, overwhelmed or annoyed, I will take one (or more) of the following actions: 

a) Stop. Shake it off. Think of 3 things I am grateful for. Smile. 

b) Breath in and our 10 times and remind myself of the wise words of Marie Forleo that ‘everything is figureoutable’. 

c) Remember that Rome was not built in a day and enjoy the journey. 

2. Feed my mind - I will read 10 books. 

Last year I started 5 books and did not even finish one. I did however, re-watch the entire series of Gossip Girl and Vampire Diaries (thank you Netflix). Did I feed my mind with juicy, inspiring ideas to motivate me each day? Not quite. I did kill a lot of time on the couch. Now I am not going to go cold turkey on my binge TV watching, but what I am going to do is read some, watch some. Balance out the scale and fall in love with reading again. Action plan: 

a) Read each morning with my morning tea for 15 minutes (new ritual!) 

b) Join a book & dine club (thanks to Daylon Soh) to keep me accountable 

c) Write a summary of what I learnt from each book at the end of each month 

3. Self-Love - I will be kind to myself. 

A wise woman (my mother) once told me that you spend the most time with you in your lifetime, so what is the point being so cruel? We are the author of our stories and this year I am writing love and happiness. So to do that, I am starting with loving myself, proudly and daily, with these actions: 

a) Talk to myself the way I talk to my best friend - loving yet honest. 

b) Saying ‘I Love You’ in the mirror each morning (it feels super uncomfortable at first but this is a game-changer). 

c) Having positive pep talks each week through journaling. 

N.B. Two things that are important to note here that may seem obvious but when I read back over this I also want to remind myself. Firstly words spoken and written are extremely powerful. They are the ones we can control. That never ending chatter in your head - you can’t control that (and if you can, please do share with me how you do!). Secondly, real habit breaking to habit forming change happens through commitment and repetition. 

The New Year No BS Guide 

And now here are some of my top conscious tips and tools so you can kick ass for 2017! 

For the mind & wellbeing 

If you want to have a better mindset the secret is repetition, repetition, repetition. The way I look at is it that you are basically re-wiring you brain after however many years you’ve been alive, to think and react differently. And as they say - practise makes perfect. 

1. Get a gratitude journal - getting into a habit of being grateful first thing in the morning and last thing at night was a game-changer for me in 2016 and one that I highly recommend. Check out The 5 Minute Journal US$22.96 or get the app S$6.98. And if you don’t want to buy one, then just write down 3 things that you are grateful for in the morning and 3 things at night. 
2. Meditate - this can be as simple as breathing in 10 times while focusing on your breath and calming your mind or actually using an app to meditate. I have used both Headspace (the first 10 sessions are free) and Oprah & Deepak (every few months when they release their new collection it is free to join for the first 21 days). 

For the body 

A girlfriend of mine, who is a regular at her gym, was telling me how the first week back in January her gym was rammed. She saw another regular and the two of them were entertained by the 15 new people in the gym instead of the normal 2-3. It is only normal after the silly season that pants are tighter and dresses are a little more snug than in November. If getting fitter and healthier is top on your list, working out and eating well should be top priority. 

1. For me, I am an at home work-out person. My two faves are free and awesome - Yoga With Adrienne (who is doing a 30-day yoga challenge and she is amazing) and for those that like getting a full sweat on FitnessBlender. 
2. Eat real food, not processed and go organic where you can. For my Singapore friends, if you haven’t already tried Kitchen By Food Rebel you have been missing out. It is an organic cafe in the CBD that is delicious, healthy and consistently great. They have just started brunch on Saturday mornings, definitely try the sweet potato benedict with rendang sauce. 

For productivity 

As a new work year commences it is quite often a time of new ideas, plans and excitement for the year ahead. But if no action is taken for those goals, disappointment will set in when the end of the year rolls around and they just become last years thoughts. 

1. The SELF Journal is one I have just started using and already love it, even bought it for 3 friends this Christmas. It is a simple, easy to use planner that has an inbuilt gratitude practice that literally takes minutes each day and gives you a fantastic overview of your plan of action and allows you to see how your tracking on your goals. 
2. Have an accountability partner. Have a call or a coffee with a friend or a colleague each week and be accountable to each other on what you will achieve and check back in with each other to see how you are going. There is strength in numbers. 

Take action on your goals this January, there is no excuse with these quick to implement and easy to sustain tips.

Live More Consciously, 

Stephanie Dickson 

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