Comedy sketches sscript2 edited
- 1. Three scripts for Stupendous By Faith Howley 3 Orchard lane Chester WA6 6FG faith1@gmail.com
- 2. INT . SHOPPING CENTRE - DAY 1. L.S A typical Saturday afternoon at a busy shopping centre. The centre is filled with Saturday shoppers. 2. L.S We see the large glass automatic door. 3. M.S TWO MEN average height dressed in black with balaclavas covering their face, are in shot stood with their backs to the wall. MAN ONE Right, 'you ready? MAN TWO Yeah, come on let's just GoO. MAN ONE Now? right you go first I'll follow. MAN TWO Okay quick go, it's the first shop on the left. 4. L.S The men sneak into the shopping centre creeping with their backs to the wall. INT. DRUG/HEALTH STORE - DAY 5. M.S The men enter through the door 6. L.S They approach the first aisle. Other shoppers notice them, startled by their black clothing, and thuggish appearance they scream. 7. C.U Of the men's hands as they grab some items off the shelf. MAN ONE Yeah that one there, grab it. 8. M.S Shot shows the robbers, they have gained the attention of the shop workers. CAMERA PANS to show everyone is now scared and frozen around the shop. CONTINUED Page 1
- 3. Everybody is staring at them anticipating their next move. MAN TWO Right now let's get out of here. 9. L.S The men are surrounded by scared and bemused shoppers and now the SECURITY GUARD appears, A small slightly overweight man in his late fifties, wearing a typical security uniform with a hat. He is braced and ready to attack the robbers. He has his back to the camera. MAN TWO They've seen us, we're surrounded! MAN ONE Quick that way. Go GO! 10. L.S They run out of the aisle and through the shop toward the checkout, CAMERA TRACKS them. 11. O.T.S of Man One as the Security Guard is just about to make a move. 12. M.S the robbers stop running as they get to the check out and casually walk to the 'queue here' sign. 13. L.S Of the shoppers and Security Guard as they fall silent. AUTOMATED VOICE Cashier number three please. 14. M.C.U Over the shoulder shot of the Men who casually walk through barriers in the queue and get to the checkout, where a terrified and trembling YOUNG CASHIER a small Asian girl in her late teens, is stood. CAMERA PANS to show the Young Cashier’s face. 15. M.S The baffled security guard approaches SECURITY GUARD Page 2 CONTINUED
- 4. Woah woah! What are you doing ? 16. C.U Of Man One's face. MAN ONE Oh, what? This? 17. E.C.U Of the tube in Man One's hand as he gestures toward it. MAN ONE Yeah.. my acne has really been playing up, I've been hiding under this mask for days. 18. C.U He lifts up his balaclava to reveal a sheepish teenage boy with acne, glasses and braces. FADE OUT FADE IN EXT. BUS STOP - DAY 1. L.S THREE PEOPLE are standing at a bus stop, Two men, young professionals, late twenties, dressed in suits. And a middle aged woman wearing a dress suit she is of small stature, and holds a briefcase in front of her with both hands on the handle. 2. E.L.S Of the street, in shot something is approaching in the distance, it looks small and distant. 3. M.S CAMERA PANS Focusing back to the people at the bus stop, they look bored with an exasperated expression. 4. M.C.U, of A YOUNG MAN in his late teens dressed in jeans and a Blue t-shirt, he joins the queue and is smaller than the other men. He is on his phone with ear phones in. He walks up and joins the people at the bus stop, looking up to nod at the suited business man to his left in acknowledgement. Page 3 CONTINUED
- 5. 5. E.L.S Now visible is the slowly approaching vehicle coming closer, becoming visible and showing it is a small mobility scooter driven by an ELDERLY MAN, wearing a tweed jacket and flat cap, with rounded glasses. As the scooter comes closer a quiet HUMMING NOISE becomes apparent. 6. M.S Of the scooter on the road CAMERA PANS back to the people still waiting at the bus stop, the woman checks their watch and sighs impatiently. 7. E.L.S We now see the people at the bus stop from the other side of the road. The scooter comes into shot from the left side, approaching the people at the bus stop, who are also, have the same bored emotionless expression on their faces. 8. L.S Side angled shot with the only thing visible the people at the bus stop. A few seconds into the shot they are splashed with an over exaggerated wave. Looking shocked they stand there soaked. 9. L.S Of the road Finally we see the elderly man who carries on driving unfased with a small smirk on his face. FADE OUT FADE IN INT. SUPERMARKET - DAY 1. L.S A supermarket checkout, A MALE SHOPPER of average height late forties, with greying hair, wearing jeans and a t-shirt approaches the checkout with a basket full of shopping, he puts his basket down on the self-service and starts to scan his items. 2. O.T.S Of the Male Shopper looking at the self-service screen. AUTOMATED VOICE Welcome, do you have your own bags? Page 4 Page 1 Page 1 CONTINUED
- 6. 3. C.U Side shot of the male shoppers hands as he taps 'no' on the screen the voice on the machine sighs. 4. O.T.S Of the Male Shopper looking at the self-service screen. AUTOMATED VOICE Ugh, one of them are we? 5. M.S Of the male shopper who is baffled, but shrugs off the comment and scans his first item. 6. O.T.S Of the Male Shopper looking at the self-service screen, As he scans his shopping. AUTOMATED VOICE Come on hurry up I have places to be. Ha low fat yogurt, who are you trying to kid. Cheesecake, more like it. Ahhhh so that's where all the pies went. 7. L.S The male shopper looks around to see if anybody else has noticed the insults, CAMERA PANS as he calls over one of the shop assistants. MALE SHOPPER Excuse me I think there's something wrong with the machine, it keeps errm insulting me. 8. M.S The FEMALE SHOP ASSISTANT, A small middle aged woman, wearing typical supermarket uniform, very curly hair and round glasses, looks at him patronisingly and sighs. FEMALE SHOP ASSISTANT Page 5 CONTINUED
- 7. Erm okay sir, no I don't think there's anything wrong there you go, that should be fine. 9. C.U Of The Female Shop Assistant's hand as she press's several buttons on the screen, CAMERA PANS as she walks away. 10. M.S Side Shot as the man continues to scan his shopping. 11. O.T.S Of the Male Shopper looking at the self-service screen. AUTOMATED VOICE Haha nice try mate. MALE SHOPPER SHUT UP. 12. L.S The other shoppers look over to the Male Shopper who appears to be screaming to himself and everyone gives him a bemused look and whispers to each other. 13. M.S Side Shot of Male Shopper. MALE SHOPPER RIGHT. 14. M.S The Male Shopper walks behind the machine unplugs it and the screen turns black, standing up and brushing his hands, he walks away unfazed. AUTOMATED VOICE Ooohhh someone's touchy. FADE OUT Page 6