Guide to Successful 1:1's
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The document provides guidance on how to get the most out of 1:1 meetings with direct reports. It discusses introducing regular 1:1 meetings to build trust. Key steps include introducing the meetings to set expectations, preparing for common challenges like employees forgetting meetings or only wanting to talk about coworkers, asking the right questions to keep employees engaged and accountable, and following up on commitments. Done correctly, 1:1 meetings provide important insights to help managers support employees' growth and career goals.
Guide to Successful 1:1's
- 1. How to get the most out of 1:1s with your team UPTICKAPP.COM
- 2. UPTICKAPP.COM3 / 1 5 UPTICKAPP.COM2 / 1 8 We know—fitting another meeting into your week is tough. But this guide will show you why 1:1s are more than worth your time if you want to grow as a leader. We’ll also share the 4 steps of great one-on-one meetings: 1. Introduce one-on-ones 2. Equip yourself for common challenges 3. Choose the right questions to ask 4. Follow up By the end of this guide, you’ll be equipped to build something special: trust. Once you’ve established that, you can focus on maintaining the relationship and guiding your employees to be the best version of themselves. Introduction
- 3. The clueless boss is a burden we’ve all been saddled with at one point or another. And if you’ve been labeled a clueless boss, it’s hard (but not impossible!) to shake the bad reputation. The clueless boss might be nice, but they’re not helpful. They don’t understand what you do each day, the nuances of team culture, or why you need the resources you’re asking for. They just don’t understand that the problems you share with them are actually a big deal. Consequently, they drag their feet in getting you answers. They don’t advocate for you or your team with upper management, and you don’t enjoy working with them. On the other hand, you have the respected boss. The Clueless Boss The key to being a respected boss instead of a clueless one UPTICKAPP.COM3 / 1 8
- 4. The respected boss is informed. Somehow, they’ve harnessed the energy, resources, and processes to collect the right information at work. They prevent blow-ups by spotting telltale signs of unhappiness. They solve problems by asking thoughtful questions. They’re aware that they don’t know everything, so they keep a watchful eye out for their own blindspots, as well as the team’s. How do you know if you’re getting the right information from your team? Here are a few signs: But how do you make all of that happen? You feel like you have the inside scoop. You’re having conversations that are open and honest. People want to talk to you about things that matter. You know how your employees feel about work, what they’re up to, and how they view the team—including you as their manager. You’re able to make decisions faster and more confidently. Insights flow freely, and your entire team has momentum to bust through their goals. The Respected Boss UPTICKAPP.COM4 / 1 8
- 5. The structure of a good one-on-one encourages disclosure. They are (or should be) regularly occurring, private, and psychologically safe. And according to research, employees actually want to tell you what’s on their mind! So keeping your 1:1 appointments is the ticket to getting valuable information from your employees. Not everything they tell you is great news, of course, but you’ll be glad you’re informed when you walk into the board meeting, or your boss calls you on the carpet, or you have to make a tough firing or hiring decision. High stakes situations demand high levels of insight and accuracy. But one-on-ones don’t just benefit you. Your whole team reaps the rewards. By getting things off their chest and being assured of your support, they see you as trustworthy (more on that later). And then there’s the obvious benefit that two heads are better than one. The two of you can solve problems together efficiently—or at least start to solve them—in less time than it might take separately. UPTICKAPP.COM5 / 1 8 1:1’s are the key
- 6. Follow these 4 steps to get the most out of 1:1s
- 7. If your team’s not familiar with one-on-one meetings, they might wonder if the meeting is a precursor to layoffs or firing. And even if the team has done one-on-ones in the past, there’s a good chance the meetings were dysfunctional or ineffective. So introduce this new habit with enthusiasm, while recognizing that many people will be skeptical. As executive coach Julia B. Austin suggests, “Announce it at a team meeting/all-hands or send out an email or Slack message being clear about why these are important to do. Be clear that you do this with all employees who work directly for you. No one is being singled out.” “Hi team, I’m excited to announce that we’re starting something new. Beginning this week, I’ll reach out to schedule a short meeting with you, one on one. This is your chance to discuss priorities and problems that don’t fit into other meetings. It’s also an opportunity for us to talk about your professional goals and get to know each other better. I’ll be meeting weekly with everyone on the team, so please be conscious of these new meetings on the calendar as you do your scheduling. Thanks in advance for testing a new practice with me!” You might write something like this: 7 / 1 8 1. Introduce your 1:1s the right way
- 8. Even if your team is thriving, individual members will naturally have ups and downs in their performance, attitude, level of motivation, and so on. Managers often face challenges when introducing one-on-one meetings. Here are a few of the most common ones and some tips for how to address them. 2. Equip yourself for common challenges UPTICKAPP.COM8 / 1 8 1. Your employee frequently forgets about the meeting or can’t make it 2. Your employee only wants to talk about their co-workers. 3. Your employee is checked out during the meeting or doesn’t keep commitments from past meetings. 4. Your employee is unhappy more often than not. 5. Your employee doesn’t trust you.
- 9. UPTICKAPP.COM9 / 1 8 Most likely, your employee is overbooked, forgetful, or doesn’t understand the importance of this meeting. It’s important to get this corrected early. Bring it up directly the next chance you get. Find out what is keeping them from prioritizing the meeting and try to problem solve with them. Make sure they know what your expectations are: “I know you have a lot going on. But I need you to come to this meeting every week, prepared to have a meaningful discussion. Can you commit to that?” For the overbooked employee: For the forgetful employee: What to do Try asking these questions Your employee frequently forgets about the meeting or can’t make it.Challenge: Is there anything I can take off of your plate so you have time for bigger priorities? Are there tasks you need to push to a later time or drop completely? What practices or habits have increased your productivity this week? Were you able to stay on top of your commitments this week? Why do you think that is?
- 10. UPTICKAPP.COM1 0 / 1 8 Make sure that what your employee is describing is not unlawful harassment (on either side). Listen to venting, but if it becomes unproductive, redirect them. Try saying something like, “Let’s focus on what you and I can control. What do you think that is? I’d like to hear your suggestions.” If the issue persists, remind the employee that while this meeting is about them and the issues they’d like to discuss, you also want to talk more specifically about them during this dedicated time. Redirect to their yearly goals or career aspirations to help them see the bigger picture. How are you positively impacting your team? What positive behaviors are you modeling for the team? What do you need from me to keep the team performing at its best? In 2 years, what will you wish you had started now? How can I help you do that? What to do Try asking these questions Your employee only wants to talk about their co-workers.Challenge:
- 11. UPTICKAPP.COM1 1 / 1 8 What behavior is making you think that they’re checked out? Consider that lack of eye contact, slow responses, and fidgeting could be personal quirks or even signs of intense focus, not disengagement. If they’re indeed checked out, try these tactics: Keep the meeting brief—no longer than 15 or 20 minutes. Set an agenda and follow it. When meetings don’t follow an agenda, they can drag on or bounce aimlessly from topic to topic. Ask your employee to fill out the agenda with details and to run the meeting based on their needs. It’s hard to check out when they’re leading. Ask your employee to follow up each meeting with a written recap. This way, they take charge of communication and you’re not expected to repeat yourself—a win-win. Was there something you planned to achieve this week that didn’t get done? What should happen now? When did you feel particularly productive this week? Why do you think that was? When did you feel unproductive this week? What do you think led to that? What to do Try asking these questions Your employee is checked out during the meeting or doesn’t keep commitments from past meetings. Challenge:
- 12. UPTICKAPP.COM1 2 / 1 8 It’s dangerously easy to overlook employee happiness, because it doesn’t feel as urgent as other business problems. You might think, “They’re just having a bad day.” But if you’re sensing unhappiness, it’s likely because they can’t hide it any longer—meaning it’s not a new problem. Unhappy employees are at risk of quitting, and in fact, most employees who leave a company do so for reasons that their manager could have changed. Of those reasons for quitting, the most prevalent one was career advancement or promotional opportunities (at 32%, followed by pay/benefits at 22% and lack of fit to job at 20%). So if you want to keep your employees happy, the recipe is simple but often overlooked: work with them to prioritize their growth, compensate them fairly, and optimize their daily work. What part of your job do you wish you didn’t have to do? Do you feel challenged at work? Are you learning new things? How could I better support you? Is there anything you’re struggling with that you want me to know about? Is there someone at the company (or outside) that you’d like to learn from? What’s one thing we could do today to help you with your long term goals? What to do Try asking these questions Your employee is unhappy more often than not.Challenge:
- 13. UPTICKAPP.COM1 3 / 1 8 If they don’t trust you because you messed something up in the past, you need to address it directly. Try saying something like, “I know we’ve butted heads in the past, and I’m sorry for my part in that. I’m hoping we can start over with a clean slate. Do you feel like that’s possible? What do you need from me to do that?” If they don’t trust you because you don’t know each other yet, the only solution is time. By being present (including doing one-on-ones consistently) and keeping your commitments, you’ll eventually build trust. Was there anything in our interactions this week that rubbed you the wrong way? How could I approach it differently next time? What do you like about my management style? What do you dislike? What could I do to help you enjoy your work more? How do you prefer to receive feedback? How do you prefer to give feedback? Is it something you’ll volunteer, or would you rather I asked for it directly? What to do Try asking these questions Your employee doesn’t trust you.Challenge:
- 14. 3. Ask the Right Questions According to marketing expert Seth Godin, there’s a singular moment that has the potential to be life changing. It’s when you realize everyone around you has an internal life as rich and conflicted as yours.And this realization has everything to do with successful one-on-ones. You know what will suck all of the honesty and vulnerability out of your one-on-ones? Walking into the meeting thinking that you’re the smart one. In order to learn, you have to have a deficit. And others will have a surplus. So don’t think of yourself as the authority figure or the person with all the answers. Think of yourself as a learning partner of your employees, as well as a student of their insights. Their rich and conflicted internal life is your gain—if you know the right questions to ask. These will get you started. UPTICKAPP.COM1 4 / 1 8 Customize your one- on-one agenda with these questions, or any others you come up with. Plus, it’s free! Try for Free!
- 15. How is everything going today? How has this last week been for you? What’s on your mind this week? Is there anything you need more clarity on right now? What are you committing to between now and the next time we meet? Is there anything in your work life that you’d like my help with? How are you progressing towards teamwide goals? Personal goals? How confident do you feel with where the company is going? How is everything going with the people you work with? Are there any interactions you want to talk about? Are there any aspects of our culture you wish you could change? Easy to ask, easy to answer (icebreakers) Productivity Team progress & culture UPTICKAPP.COM1 5 / 1 8 If you were the CEO, what’s the first thing you’d change? Other from compensation, what is your biggest motivator in your job? How happy are you in your current role? What could make it better for you? Satisfaction
- 16. UPTICKAPP.COM1 6 / 1 8 Are you getting the right balance between working alone and working with others? Do you help other members on the team? Do others help you when you need it? What’s an inexpensive thing we could do to improve our office environment for the team? What’s your favorite thing I do as a manager of this team I should keep doing? What should I stop doing? What aspect of your job you would like more help or coaching in? What’s the most important thing I can do to help you be successful? What’s one thing (or a few) you learned this week? What are your big dreams in life? Are you making progress on them? What skills would you most like to work on? Do you feel this job is helping you advance your career at the right pace? Why or why not? Team relationship Manager relationship Career progression
- 17. When you start one-on-ones, be clear on the topic of confidentiality. “Anya, I want to make sure we can talk openly, so our meetings will be confidential unless I’m required to report something or we decide together to share something outside of this setting. I’ll let you know if I have to tell someone what we talked about. Otherwise, I’d like both of us to treat these conversations as private. Is that fair?” Or perhaps, “Are you comfortable with me sharing your thoughts with the leadership team? It helps us make better decisions when we can hear from the team. Otherwise, I won’t disclose anything we talk about in these meetings with co-workers, and I trust you’ll do the same.” 4. Follow up with integrity UPTICKAPP.COM1 7 / 1 8 If there’s one step that actively builds trust, it’s this one. It’s good to listen to your employees or offer feedback in the moment, but significant workplace challenges usually extend beyond a 20-minute conversation. So how can you follow up with integrity? Here are some ideas:
- 18. If you don’t have an answer to an employee’s question, set a date by which you’ll find an answer and share it with them. Make sure you follow up on time, particularly if you’re traveling or in meetings all day. It sends the message that your team is important. On the other hand, don’t make promises prematurely. It will only disappoint your team and diminish their trust in you. Follow up before the due date if you can. “Hey Tom, I want you to know that I haven’t forgotten about your 401(k) concern. I’ve reached out to Marit in HR and am waiting on a reply. I’ll let you know as soon as I hear from her.” Make a habit of ending your meetings with a clear written recap. A verbal recap is valuable too, but easily forgotten. A written summary can be referred to throughout the week or before the next one-on-one to keep everyone on track. Written recaps also make performance reviews easy to write, since you’re equipped with relevant examples of you team member’s achievements, misses, and patterns. UPTICKAPP.COM1 8 / 1 8 We’ll help you do all of this: create a recurring agenda with thoughtful questions, set reminders so you and your teammates don’t forget your priorities, and organize everything in one place. Plus, it’s free Try for Free!