Inside Of Me
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This document contains a collection of 14 poems written by Christopher Fornesa over a 3 month period to chart his spiritual, mental, and emotional progress. The poems cover topics ranging from emotional strife to political activism and view the world from a place of both anger and hope. Fornesa believes all people contain both good and evil and that choices determine which path is taken. He hopes that by writing the poems, anger and malice in his heart will disappear to make way for hope.
Inside Of Me
- 1. Inside of Me A short collection of my thoughts and views of the world around us Written& Illustrated By: Christopher (CftxP) Fornesa iState Publishing & I-Ju.Mp
- 2. 1. A Humbled View Is it impossible to do, Be in a humbled point of view? Is it impossible to say You want to wish the pain away? Is it idealist to think That we can change the world today? Is it idealist to feel The need for change to come this day? Is it so hard to comprehend The fact that pain is in the brain? Is it so hard to think maybe The violence is from the pain? It's when we think inside of "me" The humbled view belongs to "thee". 2
- 3. 2. The Forgotten One Alone, neglected. Forgotten, that's what I am: The forgotten one. In solitude, yes, It's clear, I know I live in The stillness, I guess. So it's within, I live without and about, Forgotten, I am. 3
- 4. 3. My World in Shambles I see around me a world surrounded By thoughts maladjusted and nothing grounded. I see in this world nothing untouched, No one unaffected, though my own thoughts are clutched. Here my mind makes the decisions, In my world, knowledge is power, With emotions all over, no balance is harbored. I have no allies, I have no friends, I am myself, a loner. There seems no point, what is the trend? The best I can ever do is be a donor, For my own selfless cause, in my own selfish ways, But with my world in shambles, nothing matters, either way. 4
- 5. 4. Shadow of the Blame It creeps upon your every thought, It sees right through your great facade, It knows how much you've run amok, It runs too fast to keep the clock . It seems so worthy for the shame, It acts as if its morbid lies Affect no one except the "good": It's just the shadow of the blame. But what if it was you to blame? What if you were stuck in this game With lies, deceit, and tricks to play All you are told to do is pray. Why does your family suffer? Why must you succumb to others? It's because of you who's named, Dubbed the "Shadow of the Blame". 5
- 6. 5. The Painful Darkness Pain, be slain! Dark, depart! Be addressed, thee suppressed. Who will dare? Who will fare? Who is there, this affair? Are you here? Are they there? Are you there? Are they here? You and they, can't differ. They and you, can't quiver. It's a sound, another. It's a tune, for singing. Sounds of pain, sounds of hurt, You tune out, but still hear. You may cry, they don't feel. They can't feel, they don't listen, To your calls, to the walls. It's darkness, it's painful. 6
- 7. 6. Hope in the Light The beauty of nature at its state of being! The bounty of species, as we desire. Nobody's perfect, yet we are. Nobody's lying, yet I am. It's about time, it's about heart, It's about where you stand, It's about why you stand. It is the art, within the passion. It is the fruit of the great harvest. It is the thing that binds us all, Together we stand, divided we fall, Because alone, the mind will vacate, And so together, our minds will think. Our minds will feel, a surge of hope, A hope, present in the light, With nothing to stop our might. 7
- 8. 7. Xq28 What is this beast, this heresy? What is this thought to run amok? Why does it matter without an answer? Why is it an issue without a means? We may be gay, straight, bi, or queer, What is it that you want to hear? Where is the love, why is it hate? How did we go "without the faith"? It's science, it's nature, it's life! We strive, we struggle, in our strife! We will fight, solely, for our right, We have won, so far, our freedom! We are here, and present, it's clear. We have survived and we have thrived! When challenged that we are not "Born this way," Make "Marker X Q 2 8" the answer. 8
- 9. 8. Conclusion of a Lifetime It doesn't matter So don't give bother. They say it alters I think it falters. Life has its blessings Clearly its missing, The truth of meaning And your beginning. Here's a conclusion One of a lifetime. There's no inclusion It's not worth a dime. It's just illusion So make use of time. 9
- 10. 9. Sleepless Nights Anticipation without provision means initiation without division. So there's delusion in the illusion and then the fusion derives confusion. Think finicky then ink is key. Pace incessantly the case evidently. Becoming and numbing the drumming and "dumbing" The mind quivers. The body shivers. Your thoughts are not quitters They give you the jitters. And in those heights, the sleepless nights. 10
- 11. 10. Indecision Indecision, life's greatest treasure. It's provision, just human nature. Only division, you can't be sure. Final decision, do not assure. 11
- 12. 11. Political Irony Abortion Love and Groups can Incorrect kills? No, patience and gather, but politically, people will. truth and we'd rather What we Wars, hope, Let enigma rejected plagues and All fantasies keep the truthfully, pain with we know stigma. Felony sabotage. they're doped. For the few then Hate and Who has the brave who hypocrisy, thrill makes voice when choose to It's people's you're alone? rave political deals Who lost it all They fight for irony. With life, no when all is justice and love, only gone? what's right. mirage. 12
- 13. 12. Adversity You want your You have your They think that They have just wishes granted, own ideals, you you're below no idea, now for you. are pursued. them, a stupor. capable. You wish your You have the They know They've planned thoughts were power within, you're just none of your there, heard voices anew. insecure, great thoughts, and valued. culpable. You dare say shades You think your They don't know values special, what they darkened. despise, They act like of your ideals, they should too. possible. You know your ridiculed. you're nobody, You speak your truth super. They don't care rights as what's of your human, not words and They're afraid mind, malleable. what's viewed. suffer, a martyr. of thoughts by Their main goal You are You are alone you, and individual, it's - to harm you, and prosper, a surpassed. not new. adversity. great mind. 13
- 14. 13. Perfect Disposition The thoughts But none And Now I've I think inside doubt this dear position, remember, found the my head perfect could be the For me, I go don't reason, ones that through this tweak a To celebrate leave me alone. bone. the dark dead. Nay, forget your Plot the season. I've left We can heal myself so suppositions, perfect much to But yea, you disposition, the broken are my liege, Then will lesion. dread, So just give patron. Appear! It is you own the perfect me thy daily Fear not, go the skills bread. without vision. suspicion, you hone. 14
- 15. Dear Reader, Thank you for reading my collection of poems. As you may be able to tell, these were all created with whole-hearted emotion and many of which were thought of and created during the same night with very little editing and yet, much prose and rigor of the mind. Over the last three months (as of 19 May 2012), I've chosen to chart my spiritual, mental, and emotional progress and in the order I've given each by number is the order of which these poems were created. The topics of which these poems were written vary from emotional strife to political activism. As you can tell, I am very adept about current events and other such things. As I see it, more and more people have learned to become more dissatisfied with the state of things and so as a result, people will riot to, ironically, gain order from these ordeals. All that is good and virtuous come from within and so do all things malicious and evil. I believe that all are inherently good and evil, but whichever you choose to go through with depends on the choices you make. And so indecision takes over for which decision will make the perfect disposition. Furthermore, all of this is present, through one form or another, in everyone's life. My reasoning for writing these poems is simply so that the anger and malice within may disappear in my heart to give way to hope! Thanks for reading my set of poems and hopefully, a spark just rushed through. Sincerely, Chris (CftxP) Fornesa, iState 15