Week 11 Summary

Agenda Quick recap of Week 10 maxjan vs. lengtime The Former Tony Fasano Era vs. charles Bindy vs. The Recream Team John Bowker Experience, The vs. pauloneill4ever Mark Chmura’s Hot Tub vs. Purple Panties Yes We Can vs. Less than Will Endowed Conclusions

Quick recap of week 10 (on behalf of Elliot) T = 0-5 John Bowker Experience, The defeats Mark Chmura’s Hot Tub T = 0-3 pauloneill4ever defeats The Recream Team T = 0-1 Yes We Can defeats maxjan T = 1-5 Less Than Will Endowed defeats Purple Panties T = 0-4 Bindy defeats The Former Tony Fasano Era T = 0-2 lengtime defeats charles

Quick recap of week 10 (on behalf of Elliot) Tommy season = 32-28 T = 0-5 John Bowker Experience, The defeats Mark Chmura’s Hot Tub T = 0-3 pauloneill4ever defeats The Recream Team T = 0-1 Yes We Can defeats maxjan T = 1-5 Less Than Will Endowed defeats Purple Panties T = 0-4 Bindy defeats The Former Tony Fasano Era T = 0-2 lengtime defeats charles

Matchup profile: Rice Bowl, game two maxjan lengtime 48% 0% Email thread participation Aquarius Scorpio Sign of zodiac Will Derek Anderson ever find his way back to Roger’s roster? Can Max survive in such a strong division? Key question Important positions (QB, RB, WR) Terrell Owens: clubhouse cancer Weaknesses Unimportant positions (TE, K) Running, passing, kicking Strengths Playoff contender?

The Rice Bowl has a long and storied history 2008 2007 2006 2005 2004

The Rice Bowl has a long and storied history 2008 2007 2006 2005 2004 Week 10 Roger beats Max, 69-58

The Rice Bowl has a long and storied history 2008 2007 2006 2005 2004 Week 10 Max beats Roger, 106-67 Week 10 Roger beats Max, 69-58

The Rice Bowl has a long and storied history 2008 2007 2006 2005 2004 Week 10 Roger beats Max, 123-70 Week 10 Max beats Roger, 106-67 Week 10 Roger beats Max, 69-58

The Rice Bowl has a long and storied history Week 1 Max beats Roger, 110-74 Week 11 Max beats Roger, 115-60 2008 2007 2006 2005 2004 Week 10 Roger beats Max, 123-70 Week 10 Max beats Roger, 106-67 Week 10 Roger beats Max, 69-58

The Rice Bowl has a long and storied history Week 1 Max beats Roger, 110-74 Week 11 Max beats Roger, 115-60 Week 3 Max beats Roger, 78-67 2008 2007 2006 2005 2004 Week 10 Roger beats Max, 123-70 Week 10 Max beats Roger, 106-67 Week 10 Roger beats Max, 69-58 ? Week 11 ????????

It’s a split year: Roger beats Max, 87.78-79.76 Highlights Monday night comeback! Roger entered Monday night down 6, with stalwart Braylon Edwards playing unopposed Edwards’ 104 yard performance puts him over the top Measly production from Phillip Rivers and Mwelde Moore dooms the Janitors/janitors Buckle up: To get to the playoffs, Max (6-5) has to go through Glenn (6-5) and Elliot (7-4) Roger eliminated

It’s a split year: Roger beats Max, 87.78-79.76 Highlights Tommy = 0-1 Monday night comeback! Roger entered Monday night down 6, with stalwart Braylon Edwards playing unopposed Edwards’ 104 yard performance puts him over the top Measly production from Phillip Rivers and Mwelde Moore dooms the Janitors/janitors Buckle up: To get to the playoffs, Max (6-5) has to go through Glenn (6-5) and Elliot (7-4) Roger eliminated

Matchup profile: Stuart Hall Lions face off, once again The Former Tony Fasano Era charles 0% 45% Email thread participation Cancer Virgo [ed: that figures] Sign of zodiac Is there a role for Charlie in the Obama administration? What’s the best analogy for Tommy’s lack of championships? Key question 2L year sapping energy for FFL Fantasy teams tend to choke Weaknesses Leadership, Tony Gonzalez Fantasy team is good Strengths Playoff contender?

The “reverse jinx” does not appear to be a real effect Observations Tommy picked himself to lose only once all last season This season, Tommy is 5-3 (.625) when picking himself and 2-1 (.667) when picking his opponent I liked it better when Emma picked the games

Tommy beats Charlie, 96.8-68.5 Highlights Good all-around effort by Tommy Solid debuts by Manning (22.9) and Jennings (14.9) Kevin Smith makes a porno, runs for 112 years Game might have been close if Charlie had given the 49ers (Shaun Hill) a vote of confidence All players done by 4 pm on Sunday, in time to watch Barack Obama on 60 Minutes

Tommy beats Charlie, 96.8-68.5 Highlights Tommy = 1-1 Good all-around effort by Tommy Solid debuts by Manning (22.9) and Jennings (14.9) Kevin Smith makes a porno, runs for 112 years Game might have been close if Charlie had given the 49ers (Shaun Hill) a vote of confidence All players done by 4 pm on Sunday, in time to watch Barack Obama on 60 Minutes

Agenda Quick recap of Week 10 maxjan vs. lengtime The Former Tony Fasano Era vs. charles SURPRISE INTERLUDE: Return of the Luck Rating Bindy vs. The Recream Team John Bowker Experience, The vs. pauloneill4ever Mark Chmura’s Hot Tub vs. Purple Panties Yes We Can vs. Less than Will Endowed Conclusions

No surprises here: Will has been very lucky, Jason not so much Strong correlation between points scored and wins… … and we blame deviation from the trend on luck Unlucky Lucky -1.8 5 6.8 Jason -0.8 4 4.8 Roger -0.7 4 4.7 Bestwick -0.4 4 4.4 Charles -0.3 5 5.3 BAG -0.1 6 6.1 Glenn +0.2 6 5.8 Max Jan +0.2 4 3.8 Dylan +0.3 6 5.7 Colin +0.5 7 6.5 Elliot +0.5 7 6.5 Tommy +2.4 8 5.6 Will Luck Rating Actual wins Expected wins

Matchup profile: Two owners versus none Bindy The Recream Team 13% 23% Email thread participation Aquarius Aquarius/Capricorn Sign of zodiac Is Dylan even paying attention? Are hopes and dreams resting on Tony Romo’s pinky? Key question Many Wide receivers, pale/blonde/frail Weaknesses None Consensus management Strengths Playoff contender?

Despite making the fewest roster moves in the league, Bindy has fielded good teams Management activism does not necessarily lead to team success

… but he takes Bindy in a comeback victory! Turner & Giants D lead way as Bindy takes early lead over Dylan (despite huge day from Housh) Bo Scaife and Joe Nedney chip away at Bindy’s lead Subpar day from Tony Romo barely outpaces Roy Williams Marshawn Lynch cuts lead Bindy’s lead to 3 at the half… … and leads Dylan to a 10 point victory! Lee Evans does not get a reception.

Dylan beats Bingo/Andy/Gage, 103-93.42 Highlights Tommy = 1-2 Bindy starts DeAngelo Williams over LdT… and it works! Strong performances from Michael Turner and Giants Otherwise, uninspiring performances all around 56% of Dylan’s points came from Tim Houshmandzadeh and Marshawn Lynch And there’s nobody else on his roster that you care about or would ever start Dylan has won two straight! Bindy’s playoff hopes now are now seriously in doubt

Matchup profile: The all-too familiar versus the virtually unknown John Bowker Experience, The pauloneill4ever 5% 55% Email thread participation Unknown Gemini Sign of zodiac What does Glenn imagine we’re all like in real life? Jerk me off? Key question QB controversies Kurt Warner, bunions Weaknesses Anonymity Kurt Warner Strengths Playoff contender?

Elliot beats Glenn, 121-98.12 Highlights Impressive win by Elliot Anquan Boldin acquisition looks very good right now Continued success from Thomas Jones, Dwayne Bowe, and (eek) Kurt Warner Glenn’s inability to resolve his QB situation looms large Jake Delhomme? Really? Loses third straight Balance of power shifts in Binary Division as Elliot takes outright lead

Elliot beats Glenn, 121-98.12 Highlights Tommy = 2-2 Impressive win by Elliot Anquan Boldin acquisition looks very good right now Continued success from Thomas Jones, Dwayne Bowe, and (eek) Kurt Warner Glenn’s inability to resolve his QB situation looms large Jake Delhomme? Really? Loses third straight Balance of power shifts in Binary Division as Elliot takes outright lead

Elliot beats Glenn, 121-98.12 Highlights Tommy = 2-2 Impressive win by Elliot Anquan Boldin acquisition looks very good right now Continued success from Thomas Jones, Dwayne Bowe, and (eek) Kurt Warner Glenn’s inability to resolve his QB situation looms large Jake Delhomme? Really? Loses third straight Balance of power shifts in Binary Division as Elliot takes outright lead Further kudos on this call: “I expect Glenn to get back to his 100-point ways (or close to it), but he won't have enough to silence the Eag-master.”

Agenda Quick recap of Week 10 maxjan vs. lengtime The Former Tony Fasano Era vs. charles Bindy vs. The Recream Team John Bowker Experience, The vs. pauloneill4ever SURPRISE INTERLUDE: Tom-media bias Mark Chmura’s Hot Tub vs. Purple Panties Yes We Can vs. Less than Will Endowed Conclusions

Tommy’s predictions show a bias against Will, toward Glenn Biased against Biased toward

However, when normalizing for each player’s luck, the picture looks somewhat better Biased against Biased toward Tommy loooooves Glenn’s team

Matchup profile Mark Chmura’s Hot Tub Purple Panties 7% 25% Email thread participation Taurus Leo Sign of zodiac I’m a consultant? Please don’t tuck your shirt into your jeans? Key question Punctuation, orange Gatorade Ohio Weaknesses Well-balanced team, loud voice Scores a lot of points Strengths Playoff contender?

If measured by kicker alone, Colin and Jason would be some of the league’s best teams…

… which leads to an important question: What if only kickers counted? Note: These are real data. I really did go week by week and record the outcome of each kicker matchup. Standings after replaying the season with kickers only: 6 paul ... L @ leng ... L1 1-2-1 76 73 1 4 6 maxjan * - maxjan 4 @John... W maxjan W1 2-2-0 67 95 0 4 7 rchu66 * -l engtime 8 Purp ... L @ charles L3 1-1-2 105 81 1 6 4 jthussle y - The Former Tony Fasano Era 12 @Yes ... L Bindy L5 0-4-0 99 71 0 9 2 Dblestx11 yz - The Recream Team 9 The ... L @Less... L4 2-2-0 96 90 0 7 4 Bestwick yz - Yes We Can 3 Less... W @The ... W3 3-1-0 67 96 0 4 7 Bingoandygage * - Bindy 1 @ Bindy W Yes ... W1 3-1-0 72 90 1 3 7 will_curtiss * - Less Than Will Endowed Rank Next Previous Strk Div PA PF T L W Owner Team Don Slaze Division 11 @Mark... W The ... W3 1-3-0 90 64 0 7 4 CBisesto yz - charles 5 charles L @ Purp ... L1 1-2-1 84 96 2 3 6 Thesteerat * - Mark Chmura's Hot Tub 2 @The ... W Mark... W2 3-1-0 92 107 0 4 7 Cmistele * - Purple Panties Rank Next Previous Strk Div PA PF T L W Owner Team MGD DIVISION!!! 10 @ maxjan T John... T1 3-0-1 92 77 3 5 3 grmoods yz - Pauloneill4ever 7 leng ... T @ paul ... T1 1-1-2 81 81 2 5 4 eagan y - John Bowker Experience, The Rank Next Previous Strk Div PA PF T L W Owner Team Binary Division

Back in the real world, Jason beats Colin, 112.14-106.84 Highlights Huge win for Jason to stay in contention Big days from Ryan Grant and Larry Fitz put him over the top Cloin’s deadline acquisition, Joseph Addai, has huge day But it’s not enough for the win, as paltry WR production dooms him Ho-hum performances from two otherwise high-flying QBs Marcus Crosby outkicks Matt Bryant, 16-13

Back in the real world, Jason beats Colin, 112.14-106.84 Highlights Tommy = 3-2 Huge win for Jason to stay in contention Big days from Ryan Grant and Larry Fitz put him over the top Cloin’s deadline acquisition, Joseph Addai, has huge day But it’s not enough for the win, as paltry WR production dooms him Ho-hum performances from two otherwise high-flying QBs Marcus Crosby outkicks Matt Bryant, 16-13

Agenda Quick recap of Week 10 maxjan vs. lengtime The Former Tony Fasano Era vs. charles Bindy vs. The Recream Team John Bowker Experience, The vs. pauloneill4ever Mark Chmura’s Hot Tub vs. Purple Panties SURPRISE INTERLUDE: Japan Yes We Can vs. Less than Will Endowed Conclusions

Japan Hokkaido Aomori Iwate Akita Miyagi Yamagata Fukushima Niigata Ibaraki Chiba Kanagawa Tokyo Shizuoka Ishikawa Tochigi Nagano Gunma Gifu Aichi Yamanashi Toyama Fukui Mie Wakayama Shiga Kyoto Nara Osaka Hyogo Tottori Okayama Shimane Hiroshima Yamaguchi Kochi Tokushima Kagawa Ehime Ohita Fukuoka Saga Nagasaki Miyazaki Kumamoto Kagoshima Saitama

Matchup profile: Aggressor versus victim Less Than Will Endowed Yes We Can 30% 12% Email thread participation Aries Aquarius Sign of zodiac How does he survive daily life? Why is he humping my leg? Key question He cares too much Decisiveness Weaknesses Awesomeness Lack of filter Strengths Playoff contender?

Tony Fasano update: some kind of era this is “ The Former Tony Fasano Era” (3.9 points/game) “ The Tony Fasano Era” (10.8 points/game) Even at zero points per game, worth it to torment Tommy

This matchup may not have been the biggest blowout of the season, but it was close By margin of victory: By multiple: Similar cast of characters involved in a lot of blowouts 5 4 3 2 1 11 2 2 2 10 Week 52.68 111.96-59.28 Bestwick Will 54.36 144.8-90.44 Charles Jason 58.54 114.76-52 Dylan Bestwick 62.76 155.54-97 Roger Elliot 63.24 146-82.76 Roger Charlie Margin Score Loser Winner 5 4 3 2 1 1.9x 111.96-59.28 Bestwick Will 11 1.8x 110.54-60.24 Dylan Elliot 6 1.8x 146-82.76 Roger Charlie 10 4 2 Week 1.7x 115.68-68.4 Max Jan Tommy 2.2x 114.76-52 Dylan Bestwick Multiple Score Loser Winner

Will wins, 111.96-59.28 Highlights Well balanced attack for Will Five players in double digits Every player above 6 points Eagles sacked Ryan Fitzpatrick eight times! Message to Fitzy: don’t let the bastards get you down Defending champs, demoralized by fire sale, roll over and die

Will wins, 111.96-59.28 Highlights Tommy = 4-2 Well balanced attack for Will Five players in double digits Every player above 6 points Eagles sacked Ryan Fitzpatrick eight times! Message to Fitzy: don’t let the bastards get you down Defending champs, demoralized by fire sale, roll over and die

Tommy’s season record is: 36-30

Week 11 Summary

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Week 11 Summary