Ending cycle of violence (11.10.2014)
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The document discusses the cycle of violence that can occur in abusive relationships. It describes the typical phases as tension building, an explosion of abuse, followed by a reconciliation/honeymoon phase where the abuser apologizes and promises to change. However, the cycle then repeats, with each phase growing shorter and the abuse escalating over time. It provides examples to illustrate how victims experience each phase in the cycle of violence.
Ending cycle of violence (11.10.2014)
- 1. Presented by Jhuma Halder Project Officer, PRADG, Human Rights Unit, Concern Universal, BD
- 2. Any act that resulted physical or psychological harm or suffering to persons is called violence. It can occur as traditional practices of harmful act, process off violation of principle of humanitarian actions and dissatisfaction of conscious, subconscious and unconscious mind of a human being. It naturalizes the recovery from others.
- 3. It is one kind of attempt to fall in trouble that hampers the regular functions and needs assistance to overcome. It creates discrimination, violation of rights and increase fearness of mind, decrease quality of physical and psychological health of human being.
- 4. According to Blacks’ Law Dictionary violence is “the use of physical force” The legal maxim says that “violenta presumtio aliquando est plena probatio” that means “very powerful presumption is sometimes full proof”. The World Health Organisation (WHO) broadly defines that violence is “the intentional use of physical force or power, threatened or actual, against oneself, another person, or against a group or community, that either results in or has a high likelihood of resulting in injury, death, psychological harm, maldevelopment or deprivation.
- 5. The World Health Organization has developed three categories of violence, based on the relationship between the perpetrator/s and the victim/s: 1. Self-directed violence includes suicidal behavior and self-harm. 2. Interpersonal violence includes violence inflicted against one individual by another, or by a small group of individuals, and can be categorized as: Family and intimate partner violence; involving violence between family members, and intimate partners, including child abuse and elder abuse. This often takes place in the home. Community violence; involving violence between people who are not related, and who may or may not know each other (acquaintances and strangers). It generally takes place outside the home in public places. 3. Collective violence includes violence inflicted by large groups such as states, organized political groups, militia groups or terrorist organizations.
- 6. Community violence is defined as: violence between people who are not related, and who may or may not know each other (acquaintances and strangers). It generally, but not always, takes place outside the home, in public places. Sexual violence is defined as: any sexual act, attempt to obtain a sexual act, sexual harassment, or act directed against a person's sexuality, using coercion, by any person regardless of their relationship to the victim, in any setting. This includes various forms and contexts of sexual violence such as rape (within a relationship and by strangers or acquaintances), sexual abuse of mentally or physically disabled people and sexual abuse of children.
- 7. Domestic Violence is a pattern of physical, emotional, verbal, and sexual abuse, which includes, but is not limited to, threats, intimidation, isolation, and/or financial control. Domestic Violence is an intentional pattern of behavior that is used by one person as a means to harm and take power and control over another person in the context of a dating, family, roommate or caretaker relationship. Domestic Violence is maintained by societal and cultural attitudes, institutions, and laws that often do not identify this type of violence as wrong. Domestic violence knows no boundaries in terms of socioeconomic status, religion, race, ethnicity, ability, age, sexual orientation, immigration status or gender. Domestic violence between intimate partners occurs at the same rate in both heterosexual and same-sex couples. While domestic violence occurs in all communities and the pattern of abusive behavior is often universal, it is important to note that abusive tactics, barriers to services, subjective experience of abuse, criminal justice response, and level of family and community support can vary based on socioeconomic status, religion, race, ethnicity, ability, age, sexual orientation, immigration status or gender.
- 9. The term cycle of violence refers to repeated and dangerous acts of violence as a cyclical pattern, associated with high emotions and doctrines of retribution or revenge. The pattern, or cycle, repeats and can happen many times during a relationship. Each phase may last a different length of time and over time the level of violence may increase.
- 12. Incident Any type of abuse occurs (physical/sexual/emotional) Tension Building Abuser starts to get angry Abuse may begin There is a breakdown of communication Victim feels the need to keep the abuser calm Tension becomes too much Victim feels like they are 'walking on egg shells'
- 13. Making-Up Abuser may apologize for abuse Abuser may promise it will never happen again Abuser may blame the victim for causing the abuse Abuser may deny abuse took place or say it was not as bad as the victim claims Calm Abuser acts like the abuse never happened Physical abuse may not be taking place Promises made during 'making-up' may be met Victim may hope that the abuse is over Abuser may give gifts to victim
- 14. The cycle can happen hundreds of times in an abusive relationship. Each stage lasts a different amount of time in a relationship. The total cycle can take anywhere from a few hours to a year or more to complete. It is important to remember that not all domestic violence relationships fit the cycle. Often, as time goes on, the 'making-up' and 'calm' stages disappear.
- 15. During this phase the victim often feels as though s/he is walking on eggshells, being extra careful not to trigger an explosion. The abuser may be moody or irritable. The victim senses a growing tension in the abuser and fears that the abuse could occur at any moment. Example: I could feel it coming for about a week. Sam kept talking about being stressed at work and how I never understood how hard things were for him. I tried to be extra nice and made sure I had his favorite food around. I came home from my campus job early a few times to make sure that the apartment was clean so it would not add to his stress. Then finally, one evening I was sorting laundry and watching my favorite program, not paying attention to Sam. He must have said something to me, I am hearing impaired and cannot hear if there is a lot of background noise, and since I didn't respond he grabbed me by the hair and yanked my head around
- 16. This is typically what most people think of when they hear of an abusive relationship. Yelling, hitting, pushing, punching, rape and other forms of emotional, physical or sexual violence can occur during this phase. The abuser may make threats of future violence against the victim, her family or her pets, pull out a weapon, or destroy property. An explosion can also take the form of extreme psychological or emotional abuse such as insults, mind games, embarrassing someone in public or restricting their personal liberty (locking them into a room, binding them, restricting their access to food, bathroom etc). Example: We were hanging out with a bunch of his friends. At first he was just teasing me, then he started calling me names in front of his friends. Telling me I was stupid and that I embarrassed him. I told him I wanted to leave. We got up and went to the car. He insisted on driving me home that night. I was so mad at him for treating me like that, I just got in the car and was silent. This made him really mad. He started driving really fast, too fast and swerving all around. We almost hit another car. By the time we got to my place, I was crying and shaking. He yelled at me, saying that if I hated him so much why didn't I just run in and tell my daddy. He knew I wouldn't say anything. I would be in so much trouble if my family knew I was dating someone outside our religion, and he had already threatened to tell them himself if I ever complained..."
- 17. A cycle can begin or end (often known as the reconciliation phase) with this phase. In order to regain control of the victim after an explosion the abuser often apologizes and promises that things will be better and that he/she will change, a tactic that instills hope in the victim. The abuser may blame the victim for the explosion and tell the victim that they are forgiven but that in the future they must help the abuser so that this does not happen again. The abuser gives the victim flowers, gifts, and sweet or romantic behavior to cement the reconciliation and reinforce that a time of peace and love (aka Honeymoon) has come to the relationship. Example: A few days after the incident I was back with her. I don't know why exactly. She told me that she needed my help to get better. I guess I believed that I had somehow brought the violence out of her. That morning I'd been on the phone with a friend of mine that I knew she was jealous of, and I should have known it would make her angry. She loved me so much, and when it was good, it was so good. She made me feel so beautiful. We were happy like that for about six months until the tension started to build again
- 18. The cycle can happen hundreds of times during the course of an abusive relationship. One total cycle can take anywhere from a few hours to a year or more to complete. Each stage can vary greatly in the amount of time it takes to complete, and a stage may be skipped altogether. Typically the cycle shortens each time, so that very soon the honeymoon and tension building phases are shorter and the explosion is longer and more violent. Example: It was really good with me and my boyfriend for like a whole year or something. Then he started to get angry a lot because he kept getting in trouble at school. He used to be a good student too, but this one White teacher had it out for him because he's the only Black kid in the honors class and spread around that he was a problem kid. I mean I actually heard him talking to another professor about that. Anyway, my boyfriend was really upset about that, and sometimes he'd take it out on me, yelling and hitting me and stuff. I knew that wasn't right, but it wasn't right what was happening to him either and I wasn't going to get him into any more trouble with anyone. My mom told me that it's a crime how many young black men there are in prison. I wasn't going to do anything to add another one. But eventually it was like I couldn't even remember ever feeling good around him. It was like I was always afraid of him, and I would almost look forward to him hitting me just to get over with it. It got to the point he didn't even try to apologize anymore afterwards like he used to. I still didn't want to get him in trouble, though. I didn't know what to do.
- 19. Domestic violence Cycle of abuse A victim of domestic violence often feels like the only one being abused. That isn't true. Abuse happens to people from all backgrounds and all neighbourhoods. Domestic Violence is a reality countless people face on a daily basis.
- 20. Build-up: Some stress (ex: job, money or bills) begins this part of the cycle. The stress causes the abuser to feel powerless. The abuser chooses to act out toward a spouse or partner through name calling, insults, accusations. As the tension builds, the victim tries to calm the abuser and anticipate his/her every need. The tension becomes unbearable...like "walking on eggshell". Act Out: The tension that builds up leads to severe verbal abuse, violent physical or sexual attack. It may happen once or again and again. Abuse is always intentional and never an accident. The motivation for any type of abuse is to hurt, humiliate or have power and control over an individual.
- 21. Rationalize/Justify: In this phase the abuser uses defense mechanisms such as blaming others or minimizing violence. Defence mechanisms are used to turn blame away from the abuser and make him/her feel better. The abuser defines the abuse and interprets how things "really are". The abused partner begins to believe this interpretation. Pretend Normal: Once the rationalize/justify step is in place, both partners try to make the relationship continue in a normal way by pretending that everything is all right. However, the cycle of abuse will continue, if the problems in the relationship are not addressed.
- 22. The Penal Code, 1860 The Code of Criminal Procedure (CrPC), 1898 The Legal Aid Act, 2010 The Domestic Violence (Prevention and Protection) Act of 2010 The Pornography Control Act of 2012 The Children Act, 2013 The Human Trafficking Suppression and Prevention Act of 2012 The Child Marriages Restraint Act 1929 The Repression of Violence against Women and Children Act, 2000 (amended in 2003) The Child Marriages Restraint Act 1929 (as Amendment in 1984) The Dowry Prohibition Act, 1980. The Family Court Ordinance, 1985 (Ordinance No. xviii of 1985). Personal Laws: Muslim Marriage Act, Hindu Marriage Act, Divorce Act.
- 23. UDHR ICCPR ICESCR CEDAW CAT UN General Assembly resolutions Optional Protocols Beijing Platform resolutions Regional Instruments
Editor's Notes
- #8: Ref: http://www.uic.edu/depts/owa/criminal_court_procedures.html
- #9: Ref: http://www.justice.govt.nz/publications/global-publications/s/safer-communities-action-plan-to-reduce-community-violence-sexual-violence/definition-of-violence
- #11: Ref: http://www.dvhelppenrithregion.nsw.gov.au/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=4&Itemid=107
- #12: The "Cycle of Violence" depicts how violent events occur within a context of power and control. Many women who have experienced violence recognise this pattern. Over time the cycle may become quicker or even start to skip the "Honeymoon phase" as the violence becomes more entrenched.
- #14: Ref: http://www.domesticviolence.org/cycle-of-violence/
- #15: Adapted from the original concept of: Walker, Lenore. The Battered Woman. New York: Harper and Row, 1979.
- #16: Ref: http://www.uic.edu/depts/owa/cycle_of_violence.html
- #20: Ref:http://www.gov.mb.ca/cgi-bin/print_hit_bold.pl/justice/domestic/cycleofviolence/index.html