Missing - A Conversation Aug. 27, 2019

Conversation about “Missing”
as a Social Issue
For: London Community Teach-In
Atlohsa Native Family Healing Services
By: Maureen Trask
On: Tues. Aug. 25, 2019
9:30AM - Noon
1

Land Acknowledgment
We are gathered on traditional First Nations territory.
As a sign of recognition and respect and in the spirit of
reconciliation, I wish to pay homage to the First Nations
Ancestors who first made this land their home.
2
Ontario First Nations Map, 2011
Canada Gov.

Conversation Themes
I will facilitate conversation to explore “missing” as a
social issue. Conversation will focus on:
- the needs of families;
- the gaps in services; and
- the necessary roles of community,
policing and government.
- Share Learnings, Q & A
3

4
Daniel Robert Trask
Missing Nov. 3, 2011 Found May 24, 2015

A Poem by Tom M. Brown
5
When Someone You Love Goes Missing
https://wenswritings.wordpress.com/when-someone-you-loves-goes-missing-by-tom-m-brown/

Family Perceptions of the Disappearance
8

What is Ambiguous Loss?
Dr. Pauline Boss, principal theorist of the concept of Ambiguous Loss
and Dr. Gloria Horsley, founder and president of Open to Hope Fdn,
discuss Ambiguous Loss at the annual Association of Death Education
and Counseling (ADEC) Conference, 2011.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C2vYyefAgZ0
9

Types of Ambiguous Loss
1. Physically Absent-
Psychologically Present
2. Psychologically Absent-
Physically Present
 Adoption
 Migration
 Miscarriage and stillborn loss
 Missing people
 Natural disaster and
catastrophic tragedy
 Addictions
 Change in Gender Identity or
Gender Expression
 Dementia and Alzheimer’s
 Mental health issues
 Separation/Divorce
 Traumatic brain injury or coma
 There is no verification of death.
 There is no certainty that the person will come back.
10

Why does it matter?
11
Ambiguous Loss will:
 Freeze the grief process
 Paralyze couple and family functioning
 Change beliefs/values
 Prevent “closure” but,
“closure” is a myth
(Need answers for Resolution)
 Families can name it
(Ambiguous Loss)
 Families need support
(I’m not crazy, it’s the situation)

What do Families Need?
 Be heard and believed
 Know what to expect of self and others
 Feel safe and connected, with trust
 Understand the systems and resources
 Minimize the emotional roller coaster
 Take care of self first, find balance
 Cope in healthy ways, reduce stress
 Strive to maintain Hope, build Resiliency
12

Support Skills
 Crisis Intervention (trauma informed)
 Help with urgent practical matters
 “Navigate” the systems and resources
 Arrange and link to other services/resources
 Provide Emotional Support and Safe Space
 Demonstrate Compassion, Kindness,
Genuine Listening, Being Present
 + Understand Ambiguous Loss
13

Building Positive Relations
with Police - A Family Perspective
14
 Need to be taken seriously in the first instance –
Families know their loved one so take the report
 Eliminate lifestyle bias and assumptions about the
disappearance - Investigate all cases equally
 Keep us in the loop with ongoing communications
– Agreement on frequency of contact
 Help us make sense of the entire situation – Inform
families of process, roles and options

How Police Can Help -
to Improve Relationship with Families
• Take the Missing Persons Report
• Make a Communication Agreement with family contacts
• Conduct consistent, transparent Missing Person Practises
• Have a point of contact for Investigations and Searches
• Inform families of Victim Services/other Support Services
• Provide Reporting on Missing Persons
(as part of Annual Statistics/Trends)
• Understand the uncertainty and triggers families face
• Be there for the families and the missing person
15

Services (Support)
Support looks different to everyone
16
* Someone to really listen
* Being present
* Just being there
were by far the most popular
ways to support someone.
Tips for Supporting Those Coping with the
Disappearance of a Loved One by Cindy S.

AFP Support Framework
for those left behind
17
© Commonwealth of Australia 2014 AFP Australian Federal Police,
National Missing Persons Coordination Centre, Project Officer Sarah Wayland
June 2007 Updated March 4, 2019

* Framework – Supporting
those left behind
5 themes for working specifically with families
of missing persons:
1. Reanimation: move past “frozen”
2. A celebration so far: respond to the loss
3. The trauma timeline: explore the impact
4. A protected place: safe place of pain
5. Opportunities for growth: living with loss
© Commonwealth of Australia 2014 AFP Australian Federal Police,
National Missing Persons Coordination Centre, Project Officer Sarah Wayland 18

Triggers and Trauma
 “Having a missing loved one is the most painful
loss of all.” (Dr. Pauline Boss, 1999)
 The *Trauma Timeline is an important aspect when
assessing the implications of the loss.
 Triggers can affect the emotional ups and downs:
 Possible Sightings
 Remains Found
 Other Missing Persons
 News, tips, or leads
 Items(s) found, but no physical evidence
 Officer or Jurisdiction change(s)
* Supporting those who are left behind, Australian Federal Police (Sarah Wayland), 2007 19

Stats – Patterns in the Numbers
Toronto (Toronto Star, Oct. 19, 2018)
 More than 100,000 cases since 1990
 Avg. 4,200 missing persons' reports annually
Ontario (NCMPUR*, Fast Fact Sheet, 2018)
 17,686 Missing Person Occurrences (CPIC Transactions)
(10,189 children, 7,497 adults)
Cases on Canada’s Missing Public Site (Aug. 25, 2019)
 ON - 55 children, 425 adults, 172 unidentified remains
 Canada - 174 children, 1,253 adults, 291 unid’ed remains
20

Stats - Patterns in the Numbers
Numbers represent CPIC transactions
21
From Canada’s Missing (Public Website), Publications
www.canadasmissing.ca

Fast facts (of Missing Children/Youth Reports):
 58% involve females.
 73% (male and female) are runaways.
 62% were removed within 24 hours, while 92% were
removed within a week
 57% of all missing persons reports involve children.
 BC has the highest # of missing children reports per
capita (667 per 100,000 people), 92% higher than missing
adults in BC, followed by SK (458 per 100,000 people),
while PEI has the lowest (10 per 100,000 people).
22

Fast facts (of Adult Reports):
 57% involve males.
 68% of adults who wandered off were males.
 60% of reports were removed within 24 hours, while
88% were removed within a week Footnote 6.
 BC has the highest # of missing adult reports per capita
(246 per 100,000 people), followed by NWT
(161 per 100,000 people), while Nunavut has the
lowest (8 per 100,000 people).
23

24

Legislative/Policy Advocacy
 Petition “Ontario needs Missing Persons Legislation”
Mar. 8, 2018, the Missing Persons Act (Schedule 7 of Bill
175) proclaimed, now in effect July 1, 2019.
 Petition “Develop a National Silver Alert strategy for
Canada” e-1588, Apr. 1, 2019. See: Silver Alert Canada
 Petition “Declare a National Missing Persons Day in
Canada” tabled Jan. 29, 2018, no Gov. re-response.
 Input “Missing Persons - Police Practices” gathering
first hand experience from families with missing persons to
inform and recommend necessary changes.
 Petition “National Missing Persons Framework” TBD
26

“Missing Persons Acts” still needed in
Quebec, New Brunswick, PEI, NWT, Nunavut.
27

Other Champions required for:
 “National Missing Persons Framework”
 “Declare a National Missing Persons Week in Canada”
 “Missing Persons Status for Guardianship”
 Supports for those Missing
 Supports for Families, those left behind
 Tools, guides and kits to help family members and
also to help those who are missing.
 Strategies and education to prevent going missing.
28

MISSING PERSONS FRAMEWORK*
PREVENT
RESPOND
SUPPORT
PROTECT
To prevent people going missing and limit
the harm to those who have gone missing.
*Based on the National Missing Persons Framework for Scotland, May 2017 29

Shared Learnings / Q & A
 Ambiguous Loss is an uncertain loss
 Triggers can impact the journey (traumatic)
 Each situation is unique and individual
 It’s about finding meaning and hope in uncertainty
 “Closure” is a myth, families need answers to get
“Resolution”
 Relationship with Police is the most important one
 “Missing” is a complex, global issue (phenomenon)
 Community, Policing, Government, must all help
Any moments or thoughts? Questions? 30

Living and Learning on my
Journey of Uncertainty
“Loss of a missing loved one is often a lonely
and an untrodden path for each of us who has
to walk it.” *
31* Living in Limbo: Five Years On, Missing People UK, 2013

From me to each of you:
32
Maureen Trask: trasker@rogers.com
Support for Us – Families with
Missing Loved Ones (FB page)
Links to the Presentation and
Resource Materials will be emailed.

Missing - A Conversation Aug. 27, 2019

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