What's your communication style?
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The document discusses how understanding communication styles and behavioral patterns can help build credibility in the workplace. It notes that labeling someone as difficult may be inaccurate, as people simply differ in their styles. It suggests adjusting one's style to be more effective when interacting with others whose styles differ. Flexing one's style involves recognizing and planning to accommodate the other person's style through adjustments in content and delivery.
What's your communication style?
- 2. Perceptions of others may prevent effective communication We may label someone as difficult when in reality the person is simply different from you. Understanding our behavioral style and communication patterns, as well as those of your employees, peers, and boss can help us build credibility in the workplace 2
- 4. Assertiveness: Are opinions state with assurance, confidence or force? Is input given with declarations and attempts to direct others? Expressiveness: Are we perceived as expressing or holding back on expressing feelings? Do we react to influences, appeals or stimulation with a display of emotions? Do we displays emotions outwardly? 4
- 5. Less Assertive Behavior •Softer volume of speech •Slower pace of speech •Less expressing of opinions •Body posture is more back •Fewer directive gesture •Less eye contact More Assertive Behavior • Louder volume of speech • Faster pacing of speech • More expression of opinions • Body posture is forward • More directive gesture • Longer lasting eye contactLess Expressive Behavior •Fewer facial expressions •Less use of hands & body •Less oriented to people •More task oriented •More even pace of delivery •Less voice inflection •Less use of feeling words in describing things More Expressive Behavior •More expressive facial expressions •More use of hands & body •More people oriented •Less task oriented •More varied pace of vocal delivery •More voice inflection •More use of describing things using feeling words than fact words Controller Persuader StabilizerAnalyzer
- 6. Adjusting our style to someone else’s Helps put them at ease May increase the effectiveness of our interaction Also called “flexing” styles 6 Doesn’t Matter Where You Live If you Know How to Travel…
- 7. To be influential in a request Making a critical presentation The first time you meet a person When there may be some stress or conflict Addressing a customer problem or complaint 7
- 8. Recognize the other style Plan your flex (adjustment) both content and delivery Do the “flex” Use Active Listening Evaluate how you did 8
- 9. Is a skill To demonstrate you understand feelings and thoughts From the other person’s point of view 9 If we were supposed to talk more than we listen, we would have two mouths and one ear -Mark Twain
- 10. Understanding others’ styles involves: Observing their behavior Noting their degree of assertiveness and expressiveness 10
- 11. Affects most, if not all, people they encounter, not just those who may be overly sensitive Exhibits a threshold set lower than most – they are easily triggered to react to a situation which may not affect others Is frequent and habitual: they act this way most of the time
- 12. Take responsibility for the situation Believe it can be solved Keep the other party in good light There is more than one way to look at it
- 13. Our perceptions are based on our beliefs We react based on fight or flight We categorize as friend or foe
- 14. It is working for them
- 15. Disbelief Desire to avoid conflict Nobody wants to be the bad guy Fight or Flight Response
- 16. Brainstorm list of effects that behavior has on people around them
- 17. Mental and physical health Time and Money Ripple effect
- 18. Aggressive Arrogant Unquestioning Complainer-Whiner Unresponsive Negative Indecisive
- 19. Need for control Abusive, abrupt, accusatory and intimidating Value high levels of self confidence Bully their way toward results they want Never let others speak Steamroll others’ opinions and ideas
- 20. Be calm Stand up to the person – assertively express your own opinion Allow them to vent Identify their issues- the facts Explain benefits of other points of view Get them to sit – a less aggressive position
- 21. Don’t wait for an invitation Don’t apologize Tell them what you’re about to do Explain the reason for it
- 22. Superiority complex Have strong need for security in unpredictable world Seek respect through acknowledged competence Have tone of absolute certainty Interrupt with factoids and data dumps Be imposing, pompous, make you feel dumb Control people and events with lengthy arguments
- 23. Know your facts and discuss them in an orderly manner Do not ball-park Listen actively Help them consider alternative views – avoid challenges to their expertise Resist temptation to assert your own expert credentials Question without antagonizing
- 24. ◦ “You may be right”.
- 25. ◦ Needs to be liked ◦ Says yes to all requests ◦ Over promises and under delivers ◦ Seeks approval ◦ May be resentful and anxiety-ridden because of over-extension
- 26. ◦ Make honesty non-threatening, surface concerns about the truth ◦ Don’t allow person to over commit ◦ Ask for feedback on things that may affect your relationship ◦ Be personal without phoniness; express your value for them as a person ◦ Pay attention to humor
- 27. • Can’t or won’t take responsibility •Want sympathy •Find fault with everything •May be self-righteous or come across as morally perfect
- 28. • Don’t be an audience • Break the cycle of passing blame; insist on problem solving • Listen carefully-they may just need to vent • Make sure they have the facts of the specific situation • Don’t agree just to appease • Ask them how to potentially solve the issue
- 29. Limit risk and seek safety May be timid, uncomfortable or uncertain Often non-committal despite obvious problems Want to avoid conflict May not be able to speak honestly
- 30. Get them talking with open-ended questions Apply friendly, silent eye contact and hold it Use comments as appropriate Set time limits Be attentive and allow vagueness
- 31. Throw cold water on every idea Deflate optimism Believe in absolute, immovable barriers Feel powerless and feel those with power cannot be trusted May be angry and resentful
- 32. Resist temptation to argue Allow them to be the reality checker Require specifics; discourage generalizations Offer examples of past successes Show that some alternatives are worth trying Ask, “What’s the worst that could happen?”
- 33. Learned delay may make decision unnecessary Can’t make up their mind Tend to procrastinate Decisions cause stress Lack of organization or prioritization could be to blame
- 34. Make it easy for them to tell you why they aren’t acting Listen for indirect words, hesitations How can you help? Have them set their own intermediate deadlines Hold them to deadlines, stress quality and service