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WRITING WORKSHOP
Melanie Tannenbaum, M.A.	

SOC 463/663	

Spring 2015
WHAT MAKES A GREAT PAPER?
Specific, clear thesis	

Answers the “so what?” question	

Clear topic sentences establishing the main idea of each paragraph	

Succinct concluding sentences that summarize the main idea	

Artful transitions that bridge one paragraph to the next	

Few (or no) grammatical/typographical errors
WHO ISYOUR AUDIENCE?
Write for a general audience, not your instructor!	

Anybody who is reasonably interested in the topic should be able
to understand what you are saying	

Explain or define important concepts.	

How are you using the term _____?
WHO ISYOUR AUDIENCE?
Your primary goal is to be clear!	

Provide explanations & summaries of your points	

“Sign posts” indicating your intended direction	

Make linkages clear between paragraphs/sections	

Imagine that you are writing for your grandparents	

They are very interested in reading everything you say! But…you
have to explain every concept to them.
DEVELOPING STRUCTURED
PARAGRAPHS
Each paragraph is a mini essay	

Introduction, Body, Conclusion	

Step 1: Brainstorm	

Step 2: Rough Draft	

Step 3: Final Draft
STEP 1: BRAINSTORM
“What is the main idea of this paragraph?”	

Write that idea in as short a statement as you can	

Organize 3-5 points that support this main idea	

Facts, examples, quotes, studies…	

Re-write the main idea in different words to conclude	

Try several different variations out!
STEP 2: ROUGH DRAFT
Write your topic sentence as you think it should appear	

Write supporting sentences	

These flesh out your supporting points with details	

Provide evidence for what you are claiming	

Summarize your main idea as the conclusion	

Bridge into the next paragraph
STEP 3: FINAL DRAFT
“Writing is rewriting.”	

Once all of your main points are on the page…	

REVIEW, REFINE, REVISE	

Revisit your thesis	

Do your main points address it?	

Was it specific enough?	

RE-WRITE AS NECESSARY	

Refine your transitions; smooth it over
BRAINSTORMING STRUCTURE
METHOD 1:VISUAL CLUSTER
METHOD 2:VERBAL OUTLINE
2nd Main Point	

Supporting Point	

Detail	

Detail	

Supporting Point	

Detail	

Detail	

Conclusion
Thesis	

1st Main Point	

Supporting Point	

Detail	

Detail	

Supporting Point	

Detail	

Detail
ACTIVITY
For the next 10 minutes, take the thesis from your last essay (or
the thesis from the sample essay provided) and fill in this visual
cluster or make an outline for the “skeleton” of this essay
DEVELOPING ATHESIS
THETHESIS
THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OFYOUR PAPER.	

Topic + Argument = Thesis	

Your thesis…	

Comes at the end of your introduction	

Tells the reader your overall “so what” point	

Can be a road map for the paper’s content	

Establishes expectations
THETHESIS
Your thesis is not fixed!	

It can (and should) evolve as your ideas evolve	

If your paper doesn’t support your thesis, you might want to
change your thesis.	

What you present in the paper should not deviate from what you
promise in the thesis
HOW DO I COME UP WITH
ONE?
Sit down and think about the topic you want to write about.Why
do you find it interesting? What research do you want to do?
What studies do you want to talk about? What really intrigues
you about it?	

Try free-writing for 10-15 minutes about why you find your topic
interesting.	

You will probably find that your reasons revolve around one
specific issue — your position on that topic should be your
thesis.
HOW DO I COME UP WITH
ONE?
Ex: I want to write about ability vs. effort beliefs.	

Why do you find it interesting?	

“I feel like I saw a lot of people who had ability beliefs dropping out of college
or losing focus because they stopped being motivated once they faced
challenges or setbacks, and I think this could have been prevented, so it
bothers me that we still focus on ability.”	

The student above seems to be particularly interested in how beliefs about
intelligence impact motivation and perseverance.	

THESIS: Ability beliefs are bad because they impair student motivation & lead
to lower levels of perseverance after setbacks.
INTROS & CONCLUSIONS
INTRODUCTION
Can be several paragraphs long	

The more specific your thesis is, the more background you may need	

HOOK the reader with a question, story, or quote	

Provide the background & context for your argument	

Offer a short review of what prior authors have written	

Explain why this topic is relevant or important	

Build up to your thesis until it seems like the “obvious” next step	

Explain how you will argue your thesis
CONCLUSION
Summary of your main points	

Confirmation of your thesis	

What to include?	

Re-state your thesis in a different way	

Make a strong closing comment	

Wrap up the paper so your thesis has been addressed and its larger
significance reinforced
AVOID
Personal pronouns (I,We,You)	

Unless referring to personal experience	

Contractions (isn’t, they’re, won’t…)	

Slang	

Overly personal tone	

Opinions stated as fact	

Vague ideas	

Plagiarism
INCLUDE
Both sides of an argument	

Citations for sources	

Formal (or mostly formal) tone	

Take a position	

Concrete details
IFYOU FEEL STUCK…
Return to your thesis	

Close your eyes and write without editing	

Speak your ideas out loud into aVoice Memo	

Set a timer and write until it goes off	

GET FEEDBACK!	

Peers, instructors, tutors, the Writing Center…
WHAT IF MY ESSAY’STOO
SHORT?
Succinct and concise explanations are good.	

!
DO NOT ADD UNNECESSARY STUFF JUST TO “PUFF UP”
YOUR ESSAY.
WHAT IF MY ESSAY’STOO
SHORT?
An essay that is too short can be a clue that your thesis is too
narrow.	

If you have truly run out of things to talk about, your thesis might
not be broad enough.	

Example: Rather than saying that “extracurricular activities impact
student achievement,” you might want to expand it and say
“student achievement and student experience.”
WHAT IF MY ESSAY’STOO
SHORT?
Another good trick is adding in counterarguments.	

If you point out the “other side” of the issue, and then rebut
those arguments or show why they aren’t as compelling as your
arguments, you can take up a lot of extra space…and your essay
will be stronger for it (it makes it harder for readers to dismiss
you with one of those arguments.)
STYLETIPS
DON’T BETOO SUBJECTIVE
Focus on the message and the points you are making. No need to
emphasize the effort and pain you went through when putting
together the paper.When you cite a paper it is assumed that you
read it: the reader is much more interested in your story.	

Not so good: I read another article by Austin, Bentley and Chapin
(2004).They studied the impact of education on members of the
lower-class in Northern India.
Better:Austin, Bentley and Chapin (2004) studied the impact of
education on members of the lower-class in Northern India.
DON’T BETOO SUBJECTIVE
Don’t make your exam a report on your own reading
experience. If there is a point worth making, use a more objective
tone—as long as you can explain what the point is.	

Not so good:“When I read the article by Miller (1998) and the
article by Jones (1999) I really felt that they contradicted each
other.”	

Better:“There appears to be a contradiction between Miller
(1998) and Jones (1999).”
QUOTES
Use quotes sparingly	

Only when something cannot be said in any other way, or cannot
be said better than the original authors	

Integrate quotes into your text; they should not stand alone as if
they could substitute for a sentence from you
QUOTES
Not so good: Miller (1998) emphasized the idea that education
does not eliminate social inequality.“A better education provides
only a limited degree of social mobility.” (p. 48) Thus, it appears
that some of the hopes invested in education are unrealistic.	

Better: Miller (1998) emphasized the idea that education does
not eliminate social inequality by pointing out that “a better
education provides only a limited degree of social mobility” (p.
48).Thus, it appears that some of the hopes invested in education
are unrealistic.
QUOTES
Think about The Zagat Method
FIGHT WORDINESS!
If the same thing can be said using fewer words, use fewer
words…	

Not so good: In 2002, Dweck published an article in the journal
Social Psychology of Education which describes a research study
for she discussed different naïve theories of ability. 	

Better: Dweck (2002) discussed different naïve theories of ability.
When referencing a study you only need to mention the author
and the year, but do not need to mention anything else. The reader
can obtain all the relevant information from your reference section.
WRITING CLEARLY
What does it mean to be a “good writer”?	

WRITING CLEARLY.
It’s not about fancy words, complicated sentences, or poetic turns of
phrase — especially when it comes to academic writing.	

What is most important is that you communicate your points effectively,
clearly, and succinctly.	

Your reader should not have to go back and read your sentence twice
(or three times) to understand it.
WRITING CLEARLY
Try reading your paper back to yourself — out loud.	

Are there sentences that seem clunky or strange?	

Are there sentences that you would never say out loud in
conversation because they’re so awkward?	

If so, RE-WORD. Make them clear and simple.
WRITING CLEARLY
NO: There is a myriad of possible rationales for why the
individuals of the lower-class might require specialized attention
and programs when considering the nature of how they utilize
the available resources, pending access to such.	

YES: There are many reasons why lower-class individuals might
not know how they can make use of available resources, even if
they have access.
THE CURSE OF KNOWLEDGE!
“Write down instructions for making a PB&J Sandwich.”	

It seems easy enough…but most people will inadvertently leave
out at least one important step.	

“Take the Peanut Butter out of the cabinet.Then stick the knife
into the jar to get the peanut butter onto it.”	

You would have someone jamming the knife onto the lid…
because you never said to take the lid off the jar.
THE CURSE OF KNOWLEDGE!
Once we know things, we forget that other people don’t
know them. Or, at least, don’t know the exact definitions
we’re thinking of when writing our essays.
This is where Writing Center feedback can be really valuable! Ask
your tutor/mentor to tell you when you are using terms they
aren’t familiar with and forgetting to define/explain them first.
SUMMARY
Clear thesis	

Build out from your thesis - cluster/outline!	

Write clearly and succinctly	

Use quotes to illustrate your points, not to make them.	

Pay attention to transitions between paragraphs so your
paper flows from one part to the next.
PRACTICE
Forming a Thesis	

“I want to write about SES & college dropout rates.”	

Why does this interest you?	

“It makes me really sad that the disparities in social class don’t even stop
once students get to college — it’s like, even once you get there, you
can’t win, there are even more pressures that make lower- or working-
class students more likely to drop out than upper-class students.”	

Thesis: Social class disparities continue well into college, making lower-SES
students more likely to drop out because they face unique challenges.
PRACTICE
Outlining/The Skeleton	

Thesis: Social class disparities continue well into college, making
lower-SES students more likely to drop out because they face
unique challenges.	

What do you need to define to set your context?	

What is social class/SES? What is working? low? middle? high?	

What are the basic stats on dropping out? Do lots of students
drop out? Is it a big problem? Why should we want to fix it?
PRACTICE
What points do you need to prove to make your argument?	

Social class disparities continue well into college	

Lower-SES students are more likely to drop out	

Lower-SES students face unique challenges.	

These are your bare bone points. Now flesh them out.
PRACTICE
Social class disparities continue well into college	

What disparities? Income? Cultural capital? Habitus?	

What do these look like in practice?	

How can we tell?	

Studies on disparities within college contexts
PRACTICE
Lower-SES students are more likely to drop out	

Data on this	

Studies that show this is the case	

This would probably be the shortest section, just because
it’s so factual/data-based — you can probably just address
it with statistics on dropout rates.
PRACTICE
Lower-SES students face unique challenges.	

Challenge #1	

Studies, data, research	

Challenge #2	

Studies, data, research	

Challenge #3	

Studies, data, research
PRACTICE
Now, you’ve stated your thesis, and you’ve built your
argument to provide all the supporting evidence. 	

Take a paragraph or two to synthesize everything that you
have said. Draw connections, etc.
PRACTICE
Conclusion	

Summarize the dropout rates, why high dropout rates are a problem, the
fact that dropout rates differ by SES, and briefly list the “unique challenges”
you discussed at length.	

This would also be a good time to get a little creative…	

How could this problem be fixed?You can speculate.	

What are the implications of this for society?	

Re-state your thesis and make it clear what you are arguing.
THANKS &
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
UNR Writing Center
Eric Michael Johnson
Created the handout you received today, and thus also the
slides in here based on that handout
Markus Kemmelmeier
Created several of the slides in this presentation

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Writing Workshop - SOC 463/663, Spring 2015

  • 1. WRITING WORKSHOP Melanie Tannenbaum, M.A. SOC 463/663 Spring 2015
  • 2. WHAT MAKES A GREAT PAPER? Specific, clear thesis Answers the “so what?” question Clear topic sentences establishing the main idea of each paragraph Succinct concluding sentences that summarize the main idea Artful transitions that bridge one paragraph to the next Few (or no) grammatical/typographical errors
  • 3. WHO ISYOUR AUDIENCE? Write for a general audience, not your instructor! Anybody who is reasonably interested in the topic should be able to understand what you are saying Explain or define important concepts. How are you using the term _____?
  • 4. WHO ISYOUR AUDIENCE? Your primary goal is to be clear! Provide explanations & summaries of your points “Sign posts” indicating your intended direction Make linkages clear between paragraphs/sections Imagine that you are writing for your grandparents They are very interested in reading everything you say! But…you have to explain every concept to them.
  • 5. DEVELOPING STRUCTURED PARAGRAPHS Each paragraph is a mini essay Introduction, Body, Conclusion Step 1: Brainstorm Step 2: Rough Draft Step 3: Final Draft
  • 6. STEP 1: BRAINSTORM “What is the main idea of this paragraph?” Write that idea in as short a statement as you can Organize 3-5 points that support this main idea Facts, examples, quotes, studies… Re-write the main idea in different words to conclude Try several different variations out!
  • 7. STEP 2: ROUGH DRAFT Write your topic sentence as you think it should appear Write supporting sentences These flesh out your supporting points with details Provide evidence for what you are claiming Summarize your main idea as the conclusion Bridge into the next paragraph
  • 8. STEP 3: FINAL DRAFT “Writing is rewriting.” Once all of your main points are on the page… REVIEW, REFINE, REVISE Revisit your thesis Do your main points address it? Was it specific enough? RE-WRITE AS NECESSARY Refine your transitions; smooth it over
  • 11. METHOD 2:VERBAL OUTLINE 2nd Main Point Supporting Point Detail Detail Supporting Point Detail Detail Conclusion Thesis 1st Main Point Supporting Point Detail Detail Supporting Point Detail Detail
  • 12. ACTIVITY For the next 10 minutes, take the thesis from your last essay (or the thesis from the sample essay provided) and fill in this visual cluster or make an outline for the “skeleton” of this essay
  • 14. THETHESIS THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OFYOUR PAPER. Topic + Argument = Thesis Your thesis… Comes at the end of your introduction Tells the reader your overall “so what” point Can be a road map for the paper’s content Establishes expectations
  • 15. THETHESIS Your thesis is not fixed! It can (and should) evolve as your ideas evolve If your paper doesn’t support your thesis, you might want to change your thesis. What you present in the paper should not deviate from what you promise in the thesis
  • 16. HOW DO I COME UP WITH ONE? Sit down and think about the topic you want to write about.Why do you find it interesting? What research do you want to do? What studies do you want to talk about? What really intrigues you about it? Try free-writing for 10-15 minutes about why you find your topic interesting. You will probably find that your reasons revolve around one specific issue — your position on that topic should be your thesis.
  • 17. HOW DO I COME UP WITH ONE? Ex: I want to write about ability vs. effort beliefs. Why do you find it interesting? “I feel like I saw a lot of people who had ability beliefs dropping out of college or losing focus because they stopped being motivated once they faced challenges or setbacks, and I think this could have been prevented, so it bothers me that we still focus on ability.” The student above seems to be particularly interested in how beliefs about intelligence impact motivation and perseverance. THESIS: Ability beliefs are bad because they impair student motivation & lead to lower levels of perseverance after setbacks.
  • 19. INTRODUCTION Can be several paragraphs long The more specific your thesis is, the more background you may need HOOK the reader with a question, story, or quote Provide the background & context for your argument Offer a short review of what prior authors have written Explain why this topic is relevant or important Build up to your thesis until it seems like the “obvious” next step Explain how you will argue your thesis
  • 20. CONCLUSION Summary of your main points Confirmation of your thesis What to include? Re-state your thesis in a different way Make a strong closing comment Wrap up the paper so your thesis has been addressed and its larger significance reinforced
  • 21. AVOID Personal pronouns (I,We,You) Unless referring to personal experience Contractions (isn’t, they’re, won’t…) Slang Overly personal tone Opinions stated as fact Vague ideas Plagiarism
  • 22. INCLUDE Both sides of an argument Citations for sources Formal (or mostly formal) tone Take a position Concrete details
  • 23. IFYOU FEEL STUCK… Return to your thesis Close your eyes and write without editing Speak your ideas out loud into aVoice Memo Set a timer and write until it goes off GET FEEDBACK! Peers, instructors, tutors, the Writing Center…
  • 24. WHAT IF MY ESSAY’STOO SHORT? Succinct and concise explanations are good. ! DO NOT ADD UNNECESSARY STUFF JUST TO “PUFF UP” YOUR ESSAY.
  • 25. WHAT IF MY ESSAY’STOO SHORT? An essay that is too short can be a clue that your thesis is too narrow. If you have truly run out of things to talk about, your thesis might not be broad enough. Example: Rather than saying that “extracurricular activities impact student achievement,” you might want to expand it and say “student achievement and student experience.”
  • 26. WHAT IF MY ESSAY’STOO SHORT? Another good trick is adding in counterarguments. If you point out the “other side” of the issue, and then rebut those arguments or show why they aren’t as compelling as your arguments, you can take up a lot of extra space…and your essay will be stronger for it (it makes it harder for readers to dismiss you with one of those arguments.)
  • 28. DON’T BETOO SUBJECTIVE Focus on the message and the points you are making. No need to emphasize the effort and pain you went through when putting together the paper.When you cite a paper it is assumed that you read it: the reader is much more interested in your story. Not so good: I read another article by Austin, Bentley and Chapin (2004).They studied the impact of education on members of the lower-class in Northern India. Better:Austin, Bentley and Chapin (2004) studied the impact of education on members of the lower-class in Northern India.
  • 29. DON’T BETOO SUBJECTIVE Don’t make your exam a report on your own reading experience. If there is a point worth making, use a more objective tone—as long as you can explain what the point is. Not so good:“When I read the article by Miller (1998) and the article by Jones (1999) I really felt that they contradicted each other.” Better:“There appears to be a contradiction between Miller (1998) and Jones (1999).”
  • 30. QUOTES Use quotes sparingly Only when something cannot be said in any other way, or cannot be said better than the original authors Integrate quotes into your text; they should not stand alone as if they could substitute for a sentence from you
  • 31. QUOTES Not so good: Miller (1998) emphasized the idea that education does not eliminate social inequality.“A better education provides only a limited degree of social mobility.” (p. 48) Thus, it appears that some of the hopes invested in education are unrealistic. Better: Miller (1998) emphasized the idea that education does not eliminate social inequality by pointing out that “a better education provides only a limited degree of social mobility” (p. 48).Thus, it appears that some of the hopes invested in education are unrealistic.
  • 32. QUOTES Think about The Zagat Method
  • 33. FIGHT WORDINESS! If the same thing can be said using fewer words, use fewer words… Not so good: In 2002, Dweck published an article in the journal Social Psychology of Education which describes a research study for she discussed different naïve theories of ability. Better: Dweck (2002) discussed different naïve theories of ability. When referencing a study you only need to mention the author and the year, but do not need to mention anything else. The reader can obtain all the relevant information from your reference section.
  • 34. WRITING CLEARLY What does it mean to be a “good writer”? WRITING CLEARLY. It’s not about fancy words, complicated sentences, or poetic turns of phrase — especially when it comes to academic writing. What is most important is that you communicate your points effectively, clearly, and succinctly. Your reader should not have to go back and read your sentence twice (or three times) to understand it.
  • 35. WRITING CLEARLY Try reading your paper back to yourself — out loud. Are there sentences that seem clunky or strange? Are there sentences that you would never say out loud in conversation because they’re so awkward? If so, RE-WORD. Make them clear and simple.
  • 36. WRITING CLEARLY NO: There is a myriad of possible rationales for why the individuals of the lower-class might require specialized attention and programs when considering the nature of how they utilize the available resources, pending access to such. YES: There are many reasons why lower-class individuals might not know how they can make use of available resources, even if they have access.
  • 37. THE CURSE OF KNOWLEDGE! “Write down instructions for making a PB&J Sandwich.” It seems easy enough…but most people will inadvertently leave out at least one important step. “Take the Peanut Butter out of the cabinet.Then stick the knife into the jar to get the peanut butter onto it.” You would have someone jamming the knife onto the lid… because you never said to take the lid off the jar.
  • 38. THE CURSE OF KNOWLEDGE! Once we know things, we forget that other people don’t know them. Or, at least, don’t know the exact definitions we’re thinking of when writing our essays. This is where Writing Center feedback can be really valuable! Ask your tutor/mentor to tell you when you are using terms they aren’t familiar with and forgetting to define/explain them first.
  • 39. SUMMARY Clear thesis Build out from your thesis - cluster/outline! Write clearly and succinctly Use quotes to illustrate your points, not to make them. Pay attention to transitions between paragraphs so your paper flows from one part to the next.
  • 40. PRACTICE Forming a Thesis “I want to write about SES & college dropout rates.” Why does this interest you? “It makes me really sad that the disparities in social class don’t even stop once students get to college — it’s like, even once you get there, you can’t win, there are even more pressures that make lower- or working- class students more likely to drop out than upper-class students.” Thesis: Social class disparities continue well into college, making lower-SES students more likely to drop out because they face unique challenges.
  • 41. PRACTICE Outlining/The Skeleton Thesis: Social class disparities continue well into college, making lower-SES students more likely to drop out because they face unique challenges. What do you need to define to set your context? What is social class/SES? What is working? low? middle? high? What are the basic stats on dropping out? Do lots of students drop out? Is it a big problem? Why should we want to fix it?
  • 42. PRACTICE What points do you need to prove to make your argument? Social class disparities continue well into college Lower-SES students are more likely to drop out Lower-SES students face unique challenges. These are your bare bone points. Now flesh them out.
  • 43. PRACTICE Social class disparities continue well into college What disparities? Income? Cultural capital? Habitus? What do these look like in practice? How can we tell? Studies on disparities within college contexts
  • 44. PRACTICE Lower-SES students are more likely to drop out Data on this Studies that show this is the case This would probably be the shortest section, just because it’s so factual/data-based — you can probably just address it with statistics on dropout rates.
  • 45. PRACTICE Lower-SES students face unique challenges. Challenge #1 Studies, data, research Challenge #2 Studies, data, research Challenge #3 Studies, data, research
  • 46. PRACTICE Now, you’ve stated your thesis, and you’ve built your argument to provide all the supporting evidence. Take a paragraph or two to synthesize everything that you have said. Draw connections, etc.
  • 47. PRACTICE Conclusion Summarize the dropout rates, why high dropout rates are a problem, the fact that dropout rates differ by SES, and briefly list the “unique challenges” you discussed at length. This would also be a good time to get a little creative… How could this problem be fixed?You can speculate. What are the implications of this for society? Re-state your thesis and make it clear what you are arguing.
  • 48. THANKS & ACKNOWLEDGMENTS UNR Writing Center Eric Michael Johnson Created the handout you received today, and thus also the slides in here based on that handout Markus Kemmelmeier Created several of the slides in this presentation