LESSON_ONE trasncripcion.pdf
- 1. www.everydaywithpurpose.com 1 L E S S O N O N E
- 2. www.everydaywithpurpose.com 2 LESSON ONE DISCOVER YOUR PURPOSE You know average is average and I am always amazed that so many people somehow have fallen in love with average. The thing I have noticed about average people is, they don’t want anybody else to rise above average. When you are around average people, if you decide to make something of your life and go the extra mile and do something, what are they are doing? They are always trying to pull you back down. But this day is about living a life above average. And so we are going to talk in this first session about purpose, because purpose is essential to a person’s life. It is the anchor that holds you during a storm. It is your north star that guides you when you are absolutely confused, or everything and everyone around you is confused. I want to talk to you about what it means to know your purpose; to find it and then to live it. We are going to be talking about being what I call an Everyday Purpose Person. I love that phrase. An Everyday Purpose Person is one that every day gets up and they live their life on purpose; which means that they are going to make it count. It means that they are going to get the highest return from that day. What is beautiful is, that once we learn to be intentional with our life—once we learn to find a purpose—and then live our purpose, we can be an Everyday Purpose Person. There are two great days in any person’s life. The day they are born and the day they discover why. We have all had our first day. Our birth. But a lot of people have never had the second day. The day that they discover why they were born. My goal today is very simple. My goal today is to help you find and live out your purpose. For many of you, you are way above average. You have found your purpose. If you have found your purpose, then you are one of the few that are going to be extraordinary. But I want to talk to you today not only about finding that purpose, but how you maximize and live it out. How do you take that purpose after you know what it is to the maximum? I can remember very well the day that I began discovering my purpose. I was a college freshman. I was in Psychology 101 class, and a guest teacher sat there in the classroom that day with us and said to us, “If you are going to be a leader, there are three questions that you need to ask yourself.” So here I am, I am in class, I have my pen and paper and I am getting ready to write down these three questions just like a college kid does. What I didn’t realize is as I was writing these three things down on paper; these three things were to be written on my heart. These would be notes that I would never get away from. The college professor that day said the three questions every leader needs to ask himself or herself are: 1. What do I sing about? 2. What do I cry about? 3. What do I dream about? I wrote them down on paper, not realizing at that moment how significant that would be in me discovering my purpose. Now, I am a college freshman so let’s just start there. College freshmen really don’t have
- 3. www.everydaywithpurpose.com 3 depth of maturity. They don’t have a lot of insight and thinking, so when he asked me the question, “ What do you sing about?” the biggest thought that a college freshman has is, “I asked a girl out and she said yes!” That is as good as it gets. “What do you cry about?” She said no! “What do you dream about?” She changed her mind! So that is as good as it gets. It doesn’t get any better for a college freshman. But I wrote them down, and there is a lesson here that I think we all need to grab a hold of today. The lesson is this: whenever we are trying to help people and add value to people, you never know when what you say takes. That is why you ought to be intentionally saying good things to people every day. A lot of the things you say that are good, they are not going to take. You never know the time that it sticks. This was one of the times. I have written them down, and my immaturity isn’t going to let me go far then, but it’s okay. In finding your purpose, it is more than a discovery; it is a journey of discovery. Even after you find your purpose, you have to develop it. In other words, when I began my purpose of trying to add value to people, I wanted to add value to people. But there was nothing sophisticated about that. I didn’t know how to add value to people, I didn’t know how to use my gifts to add value to people, I didn’t know what kind of people I wanted to add value to, and I didn’t know how I wanted to even add value to the people I wanted to add value to. So I started what I called The Discovery Journey of Developing Your Purpose. It is one thing to find it, and it is another thing to mature it. How do you mature it? You mature your purpose by determining to dive as deep as you can to make that purpose meaningful and fulfilling. Not only in your life, but also in the life of others. There are two ways to find your purpose; through your passion and through your giftedness. That is how I find my purpose, that is how you find your purpose, and that is how everybody reading this will find his or her purpose—through your passion and through your giftedness. When the teacher in Psychology 101 asked, “What do you sing, cry, and dream about,” he was talking about passion. Those are words of passion. Those are emotional words. What do you sing about, what really makes you happy? What do you cry about, what makes you really sad? What do you dream about, what if you could be into anything you wanted to be or do anything you wanted to do, what would you be and what would you do? All that is passion. That is essential, as we are going to find out in a moment, to developing great purpose. If you are going to find your purpose and live it out, you have to not only ask yourself, “What am I passionate about?” You have to ask yourself, “What am I gifted in? What do I do well?” The reason that you need to know that is very simple. It is in your giftedness that you are effective. So therefore, when I can match my passion—sing, cry, dream—with my giftedness (the things I do well), I have not only discovered my purpose, now I am going to be able to develop that purpose. I am going to be able to take that and use it to beautifully add value to my life and the lives of others. When you find your purpose, you find your why. This is huge because there are a lot of people who have never discovered their purpose and they are constantly asking why. In fact, there is a quote that perhaps you have heard many times; “Some people look at things as they are and ask why and some people look at things as they could be ask why not?”
- 4. www.everydaywithpurpose.com 4 When people look at things as they are and ask why, they are people that have never discovered their purpose. In other words, they are looking at life and it is not good, and it is not turning out really well for them. Why is this happening? When the best thing a person can do is ask the “why” of life, they have never discovered their purpose. Those who look at things as they could be, and ask why not, have discovered their purpose. They are looking at life as it is, and they are saying there is a better way, I can make a better way, I can provide a better way, I have an answer, and I can help. When you find your why, you find your way. The “why” gives direction. When you find a person that has discovered their purpose, they are no longer lost. Haven’t you seen people that look like a lost puppy? You watch them, and you can see that they are wandering and they haven’t found their way. When you find your why, you find your way. You begin to now live a life that has some direction, some aim to it. When you find your why, you also find your will; your discipline. We talk a lot about people being disciplined. It is the ability to start something, follow through and complete it. All’s well that begins well. Disciplined people know that all’s well that ends well. We talk about discipline quite a bit, and when people say I need to get more self-discipline in my life, one of the first things I ask them is if they know what their purpose is? You show me a person that doesn’t have a purpose, a why, and I’ll show you a person that isn’t self- disciplined. Discipline is a result of having a reason to be disciplined. When you don’t have a reason to be disciplined, you are being disciplined for discipline’s sake. You are never going to achieve and do and stick with and complete and finish the task that is before you. When a person finds their purpose, almost immediately with that they find discipline to fulfill that purpose. If you have no purpose, I promise you, you will lack the discipline. When people say you really need to stick with it, you need to be disciplined, I always ask them if they know what their purpose is. It is the purpose that puts steel in the backbone of discipline. When you find your way, you find your why. When you find your why, you find your will, and when you find your will you find your wings. All of a sudden you can fly. All of a sudden you can go higher than you have ever gone before. Why? Now you have a reason to soar. You need to find your wings, and you need to be able to fly and here is why. Everything worthwhile is uphill. Your purpose gives you the reason to go uphill. Why would you go uphill every day unless you have a reason? In fact I tell people, since everything worthwhile is uphill, what most people do is they put a goal up top. They say this is my goal. I say don’t put up a goal because what happens is we achieve a goal and then we have to go get another goal. If we have to go get another goal, you start sliding back downhill. If you put your purpose at the top, not your goals, that is your north star. That is what you are going for. That is why you are taking those uphill steps. Keep your purpose at the top of the hill because everything worthwhile is uphill. The reason that you go uphill is because you have purpose. Passion is the fuel. It is the fuel that keeps you going uphill. It is the energy. It is what you need every day to keep going. So you have your purpose at the top of the hill, and your passion is feeding that fuel and giving you that energy day-in and day-out. Make those steps upward. Your giftedness determines how high up hill you can climb. If you are highly gifted, you
- 5. www.everydaywithpurpose.com 5 can take a much steeper hill than if you are less gifted. Your purpose is at the top of the hill, it is the reason you should climb it. Your passion is the energy to get you there, and your giftedness determines how high of a hill you can climb. We are going to take those three questions—What do you sing, cry and dream about—and we are going to discover, we are going to begin to find our purpose. What do you sing about? What I sing about, I have to give you my journey. This isn’t yours. You have something that makes you sing, and it isn’t the same as mine. Purposes aren’t all the same. Let me give you what I sing about only as examples to help you. What I sing about is very simple. I sing about people who have found their purpose and intentionally add value to others. That is what makes me sing. When I find a person that has discovered why they are here, their reason for living, and have taken that purpose to use it to to add value to the people around them; that makes me sing. For example, my purpose is very simple. My purpose at the top of the hill that I am always looking forward to as I come upward, is to every day intentionally add value to people. That is my purpose. That is why I am here right now. That is the only reason I’m here. That is the reason I’m excited about being here. Why? Because I knew that I was going to be able to add value to you, so at the end of the day you can walk out of here and say, “John is my friend, and John gave me some ideas, thoughts, examples, and principles that are going to make me better.” What I sing about is that I intentionally add value to people every day. Using my gifts, remember giftedness is passion, compounds my purpose. The moment I start using my gifts, the purpose that I live for takes a whole new level because I am in my sweet spot. I am doing what I really do well. What I’ve done is I’ve matched my purpose with my giftedness and everything compounds. For me it is speaking, writing, leading, and relating with people. Those are my gifts. I take my gifts and I match them up with my purpose, and I begin to compound this purpose. I take a purpose that is good, and I’m starting to make it bigger than life. I’ve matched my purpose with my gifts, and that brings the compounding of my success. Intentionally adding value to people consistently compounds my gifts. My gifts compound my purpose. When I intentionally add value to people on a daily basis, now I am consistently compounding my purpose. That gets huge, and that is what I want for you. I want you to intentionally live and take your gifts, match them with your purpose, so that you are not only compounding the reason that you are here, but you are consistently compounding the reason you are here. Talk about an ROI? What would happen every day in your life if you knew why you were here and you knew what your gifts were and you intentionally took those things that you are gifted in and you put them under your purpose? If every day you intentionally added value to people, do you not think after a while you would get a reputation of making a different in people’s lives? Do you not think after a while you would develop a lifestyle, a habit, that would truly allow you to day-in and day-out be effective in the work place? Be effective with your family? Be effective with your community? You would begin to live a life of significance. Remember this, consistency compounds and intentional living provides consistency. The question is not if you are good once in a while? I know some people who are
- 6. www.everydaywithpurpose.com 6 good, but you have to catch them that one time a year. When you are around them, you walk up to them and say, “I hope this your day!” I don’t want that for you. I don’t want people to come around you and hope it’s your day. I want people to come around you and know it’s your day because leadership—influence—is being able to day-in and day-out be consistent in adding value to people. The only way that can happen is when you and I live intentionally. You are going to repeatedly hear me say, “Everything worthwhile is uphill.” You’re going to hear me say that your purpose has to be at the top of the hill. You have to constantly see it because that’s the reason to climb that hill. Your passion is your energy. Your giftedness is going to determine what kind of a hill you can take. Consistency compounds, and the only way that you and I can be consistent in our life is to be intentional in our life on a daily basis. Since every day I add value to people, what am I doing every day? I am asking how do I add value to people? I’ve always wanted to add value to people. I wrote a book many years ago, almost twenty years ago called Developing The Leader Within You. It sold well. It sold millions of copies, and I’m going to revise it this year because those principles are so good. I go back and read that book and I think I can do so much better. I have fresh stories, new thoughts, and more principles to add. Why would I take a book that sold 2 million plus copies and revise it? There’s only one reason. I want to add value to people. I this book to be a better book today than it was yesterday. Whenever you are adding value to people, you are constantly looking at yourself and asking if you are going to add value to people how do you add value to yourself? I have to get better to help you get better. I have to grow to help you grow. I have to take a journey to help you take a journey. When I said I sing about intentionally adding value to people, the whole process is if I’m going to be that and do that, I have to do that and I have to be that myself. Last week, Margaret and I took our children and grandchildren on a trip. We went to England and Paris. Every year for Christmas we give our children and grandchildren a trip. That is their gift. I learned a long time ago that if you give people things they’ll lose them, break them, get rid of them. If you give them memories, they stick forever. The best gifts are memory gifts. Every year we give a gift to our kids and our grandchildren for Christmas. They never know what it is going to be. When we decide what we are going to do, we will ask them to save the dates. Wherever we are going to go, Margaret gets a Christmas tree ornament with the place that we are going to go. She wraps it up and then all of the grandchildren open it up at the same time. There’s a guess on which one of the grandchildren are going to figure it out first. When they figure it out, the grandchildren and papa, that’s me, we do a travel dance. Every year we do this. That is how we really create memories for the kids. We were in London for about seven days, Paris for about four, and when our guide in London was finished the last morning I pulled her aside and asked if I could meet her. I sat down with her and I gave her a financial tip for helping us. Then I shared with her all the ways that week she had added value to my family. I kept taking notes of little things she said and little things she did. I went through every day how she added
- 7. www.everydaywithpurpose.com 7 value to my family. This guide who had been a guide for seventeen years is seated in her chair bawling. It cost me nothing except intentional thinking of asking myself, how can I add value to my guide? She wrote me the most beautiful letter. She said my most fulfilling week in seventeen years as a guide, was being with you and your family. Why was it the most fulfilling? It’s very simple. I took time to intentionally think about what could I do to add value to this guide who every day from nine in the morning to sometimes nine at night is with us doing her best to show us the sites and teach us the history. Once you begin to teach yourself and develop the discipline and the habit of asking yourself every day how you can add value to people, you begin to think things that average people don’t think. You begin to do things that average people don’t do. You begin to reap results that average people don’t reap. This message can change your life. All it took was the discipline with my iPhone to every day take notes when the guide did something that was a little bit unusual. We had a day where it was raining, and we were going to do a couple of outdoor things, and she said it is raining what if we did this to be inside and she said we’ll leave our agenda and we’ll go do these things. I’m thinking, Caroline is flexible with my family. I have to tell her how much I appreciate that. The thing that I sing about is when I add value to people. We get emails and wonderful thoughts every day saying thank you, and when people say you have helped me, given me a new thought, my life is better; that makes me sing. Preparing on the front end makes me sing. When I prepared this lesson today, I’m singing while I’m preparing it. Here’s what people miss. People think that you only sing when you receive something. The greatest singers are the ones who sing when they are preparing to give something. It’s so much fun, and because I have found my passion and purpose, life is beautiful. I don’t want to stop. I’m sixty-nine, and people want me to stop. The people who want me to stop are the people who have stopped. Because they have no life, they would like me to join them. Why would I stop? Why would I miss this experience? What is better than me sitting with a few hundred people who want to make their life better? Sharing with them principles that will help them find their purpose, live out their purpose and live intentionally. Why would I miss this incredible time with you today to add value to you? Can you tell me what’s better than this? I love to play golf. But I’ve never played golf that gave me the return this gives me. I am not any good at golf. I was playing golf the other day and a guy looked at me and said, “John you only have one problem when you play.” I thought this is good I can do one problem. He said, “You’re too close to the ball after you hit it.” So people ask me when I am going to retire. I’m not going to retire. Why would I stop doing what I love to do? I’m here to tell you that once you have your passion, you get your song that makes you sing, you get the passion of your purpose, and I promise you that you’ll never want to stop. In fact, the question I’ve got for you is a simple question. Write it down for yourself, “What do I sing about?” On your own tomorrow, pull it out and ask what makes you sing. If nothing makes you sing, then you can retire. You can live a boring life the rest of your life. You have seen people that look dead. I look at some people and they do nothing, and I wonder how are they going to know when to retire? Some people seem dead. How are they going to know when they really die? What do you sing about? Huge question.
- 8. www.everydaywithpurpose.com 8 What do you cry about? This is a totally opposite emotion that absolutely fits in the picture of your passion to discover your purpose. What I cry about is something very simple. I cry about people who have not found their purpose, and therefore they live unintentional lives. That makes me sad because I see them every day. I see people who are killing time every day. I see people at work every day, who are waiting for the time when work is going to be over. It makes me very sad. I’m a person of faith, and I’m not trying to throw that on you, but it makes me very sad because God created us with a purpose. Think about that. You were created to do something worthwhile. To be your brother’s keeper, and to make life better, and God so invested in you that He created you with that purpose and He created you in His image. To watch people after all the good that He has put in them, and they never tap into that, find it, develop it, or follow it? It makes me sad. I can remember as a young person, I wanted to make a difference with people. I wanted to find people and I wanted to get them on the Maxwell train. We were going to make a difference. I went around and got them on the train and said we are going to climb the hill; everything worthwhile is uphill. We are going to go with purpose at the top. We started climbing the hill, we would stop for a rest break, they would get off the train and they never got back on. I thought they were just getting a restroom break. I didn’t know they were retiring. I would feel bad so I would go get them, and I would put them back on the Maxwell train, buckle them up, and we would take off and we would stop and they would get off and I would have to go get them again. I don’t know about you, but after a while you wear out getting those people back on the train. One day it hit me. They don’t want to go to the top. They don’t have a purpose, they don’t think everything worthwhile is uphill. They think they want to be at the bottom of the hill and let everything roll to them. That is the day I realized that you don’t want everybody on your train. I began to make the Maxwell train for people who wanted to make a difference. And what I have found out is when I let go of all those people who didn’t want to climb the hill, it was so much easier to climb the hill. It’s hard to climb the hill, “Hit the ball drag Charlie.” After a while don’t you just want to hit Charlie? But I cry about it. I really cry about it, because I know they will never discover who they were ever meant to be until they find their purpose. That is what I cry about. That is why I have lessons like this. This is why we have seminars and teachings like this because we want to help. We want to help somebody find their purpose because we know that you have great value and you have something to add to it. I remember when I wrote Put Your Dream to the Test. I was so excited about Put Your Dream to the Test. I’ll help people go through the questions, to make sure they have the right questions, test their dream out, and pass their dream. I went out and I started talking about Put Your Dream to the Test, and I had gone and made it about two lectures and a lady came up to me and said, “I love that Put Your Dream to the Test, but there’s a problem, I don’t have a dream.” I thought, oh no, I’ve never thought about that. I’ve never thought about people who don’t have a dream or a purpose. I cry about that, because there is a relationship between finding your purpose and finding your energy. You show me a person who has found their purpose; I’ll show you a person who has found their energy. You show me a person that doesn’t have
- 9. www.everydaywithpurpose.com 9 any purpose; I’ll show you a person who doesn’t have energy. If you haven’t found your purpose, you wake up, get up and you might as well go back to bed. Sleep a little longer, because nothing good is going to happen. When I was a kid I loved to play basketball, so my dad said he would build me a backboard on the garage. He got me a basketball and then he got called away on a business thing. He was getting ready to put the rim up, but he said he’d put the rim up after his business trip. I said that’s okay; I have a basketball, a driveway, and a backboard. I went around the driveway and bounced a bit and after about five minutes, I thought this is a little boring. I went over to the backboard, and it didn’t have the goal or the rim, and I wondered what it would be like if I threw the ball up against the backboard. I let the ball dribble itself off of the driveway and I never picked the ball up until dad came home and put up the goal. I was only in the fourth grade, but that is the day I realized it is no fun throwing the ball if you don’t have something to aim at. When you get your goal, your rim, your purpose, it begins to energize you. I really don’t like to bowl. Let’s start there. I do bowl once in a while, and yes I do have the name “holly rollers.” The only reason I bowl is because of the ten pins at the end of the alley. If you think that’s not true, the next time you go bowling with your friends, don’t bowl for the pins, just go out and have fun together. Then go to the bowling alley and tell the operator to take the ten pins off. Say you are here for relationships. We just want to hold hands. Every once in a while we’ll take that ball and lay it down the alley, but the pins don’t mean anything. Lay that ball down the alley and watch it go all the way down and go clunk, and see how many more times you want to bowl that ball. The pins give meaning and energy to why you bowl the ball. I know people that are living their life without a rim They are living their life without bowling pins, and they are wondering why they are not going anywhere, why they are not singing and they are not enjoying the process. It’s because they have no purpose and so they have no energy. How do I help people find their purpose? That is why we are here. We are here because we have to find our purpose. We have to live our purpose. How do I do that? I’m going to come back with more teaching on this. The last question of the three questions that really stirs passion and purpose is, What do I dream about? What I dream about is helping millions of people – I mean millions. I don’t dream about helping three people. My dream is to help millions of people literally live this intentional life and begin to find their purpose, their reason for being here, and begin to add value to people. In another session, I’m going to tell you how my dream works and maybe you will want to help me with my dream. My dream is so big I need help. In fact, if your dream is just big enough for you, it is not a big enough dream. It ought to include others. If you can catch on to what I’m teaching you today, your life and the people’s lives around you will immediately begin to become a positive change. You have to ask yourself very simply, how do I get from downhill sliding to uphill climbing? Here is my suggestion. Your success today is not what you are hearing today. Your success today is how long will you stay with what I’ve taught you today and get better.
- 10. www.everydaywithpurpose.com THIS RESOURCE WAS CREATED AND DISTRIBUTED BY THE JOHN MAXWELL COMPANY johnmaxwell.com Copyright 2016 The John Maxwell Company. This content may not be reprinted or reproduced without written permission from The John Maxwell Company, except for brief quotations in critical reviews or articles.