Engl 396 oct. 23 presentation (version 2)
- 1. Cohesion & Coherence or: Writing That “Hangs Together”
- 2. The two capital secrets in the art of prose composition are these: first, the philosophy of transition and connection; or the art by which one step in an evolution of thought is made to arise out of another: all fluent and effective composition depends on the connections; secondly, the way in which sentences are made to modify each other; for the most powerful effects in written eloquence arise out of this reverberation, as it were, from each other in a rapid succession of sentences. - writer Thomas de Quincey on the accoustodynamics of prose
- 3. ~ COHESION ~
- 4. ~ COHESION ~ A feeling of connectedness and fluidity elicited, from sentence to sentence, by the arrangement of words
- 5. ~ COHESION ~ A feeling of connectedness and fluidity elicited, from sentence to sentence, by the arrangement of words Achieved when a writer uses the end of the sentence preceding to set up the beginning of the following sentence: e.g., “A black hole is created by the collapse of a dead star into a point perhaps no larger than a marble. So much matter compressed into so little volume changes the fabric of space around it in puzzling ways.”
- 6. ~ COHESION ~ A feeling of connectedness and fluidity elicited, from sentence to sentence, by the arrangement of words Achieved when a writer uses the end of the sentence preceding to set up the beginning of the following sentence: e.g., “A black hole is created by the collapse of a dead star into a point perhaps no larger than a marble. So much matter compressed into so little volume changes the fabric of space around it in puzzling ways.” Passive constructions, though normally frowned upon, come in handy here as they enable cohesive arrangement
- 7. ~ COHESION ~ A feeling of connectedness and fluidity elicited, from sentence to sentence, by the arrangement of words Achieved when a writer uses the end of the sentence preceding to set up the beginning of the following sentence: e.g., “A black hole is created by the collapse of a dead star into a point perhaps no larger than a marble. So much matter compressed into so little volume changes the fabric of space around it in puzzling ways.” Passive constructions, though normally frowned upon, come in handy here as they enable cohesive arrangement Cohesion between sentences is more important than clarity within an individual sentence
- 8. If he would inform, he must advance regularly from Things known to things unknown, distinctly without Confusion, and the lower he begins the better. It is a common Fault in writers, to allow their Readers too much knowledge: They begin with that which should be in the Middle, and skipping backwards and forwards, ’tis impossible for any one but he who is perfect in the Subject before, to understand their Work, and such an one has no Occasion to read it. - Benjamin Franklin, the “Old Before New” principle
- 9. ~ Old Before New ~
- 10. ~ Old Before New ~ For the purposes of cohesion, writers are encouraged to introduce new information into a sentence only after having prefaced it with information familiar to the reader
- 11. ~ Old Before New ~ For the purposes of cohesion, writers are encouraged to introduce new information into a sentence only after having prefaced it with information familiar to the reader Familiarity is established in the previous sentence or sentences, or assumed when what is being presented is thought to be common knowledge
- 12. ~ Old Before New ~ For the purposes of cohesion, writers are encouraged to introduce new information into a sentence only after having prefaced it with information familiar to the reader Familiarity is established in the previous sentence or sentences, or assumed when what is being presented is thought to be common knowledge e.g., “The collapse of a dead star into a point perhaps no larger than a marble creates a black hole. So much matter compressed into so little volume changes the fabric of space around it in puzzling ways. Astronomers have reported that…”
- 13. ~ Old Before New ~ For the purposes of cohesion, writers are encouraged to introduce new information into a sentence only after having prefaced it with information familiar to the reader Familiarity is established in the previous sentence or sentences, or assumed when what is being presented is thought to be common knowledge e.g., “The collapse of a dead star into a point perhaps no larger than a marble creates a black hole. So much matter compressed into so little volume changes the fabric of space around it in puzzling ways. Astronomers have reported that…” The introduction of “astronomers” into the writing does not ignore the principle or disorient the reader because topical familiarity has been established–it is clear that the passage is about phenomena in outer space
- 14. ~ Old Before New ~ For the purposes of cohesion, writers are encouraged to introduce new information into a sentence only after having prefaced it with information familiar to the reader Familiarity is established in the previous sentence or sentences, or assumed when what is being presented is thought to be common knowledge e.g., “The collapse of a dead star into a point perhaps no larger than a marble creates a black hole. So much matter compressed into so little volume changes the fabric of space around it in puzzling ways. Astronomers have reported that…” The introduction of “astronomers” into the writing does not ignore the principle or disorient the reader because topical familiarity has been established–it is clear that the passage is about phenomena in outer space Adhering to this principle is difficult as a writer: after working at length with information and ideas, one is sure to develop a blindness to what would be unfamiliar to the reader
- 15. Exercise #1 Old/familiar information is boldfaced Improve the cohesive flow of the follow short sentences: She went clubbing on her first night there. She sighted a celebrity while at the club. Tweet your answers #eatingcrows
- 16. ~ COHERENCE ~
- 17. ~ COHERENCE ~ Involving a great deal more than the sequence flow of sentences, this is the totalizing quality of writing that remains connected from beginning to end, through all of its changes in subject
- 18. ~ COHERENCE ~ Involving a great deal more than the sequence flow of sentences, this is the totalizing quality of writing that remains connected from beginning to end, through all of its changes in subject Internally unrelated subjects cannot be made to cohere
- 19. ~ COHERENCE ~ Involving a great deal more than the sequence flow of sentences, this is the totalizing quality of writing that remains connected from beginning to end, through all of its changes in subject Internally unrelated subjects cannot be made to cohere The following wildly digressive passage is an example of writing that is cohesive but incoherent: Sayner, Wisconsin, is the snowmobile capital of the world. The buzzing of snowmobile engines fills the air, and their tank-like tracks crisscross the snow. The snow reminds me of mom’s mashed potatoes, covered with furrows I would draw with my fork.
- 20. ~ COHERENCE ~ Nothing can be done to remedy a passage with disconnected subjects
- 21. ~ COHERENCE ~ Nothing can be done to remedy a passage with disconnected subjects However, disorganization/incoherence occasioned by subject-topic difference and overlong, inconsistent topics is another matter… …as in the following disjointed passage, color-coded for your convenience: Consistent ideas toward the beginning of sentences, especially in their subjects, help readers understand what a passage is generally about. A sense of coherence arises when a sequence of topics comprises a narrow set of related ideas. But the context of each sentence is lost by seemingly random shifts of topics.
- 22. ~ COHERENCE ~ Nothing can be done to remedy a passage with disconnected subjects However, disorganization/incoherence occasioned by subject-topic difference and overlong, inconsistent topics is another matter… …as in the following disjointed passage, color-coded for your convenience: Consistent ideas toward the beginning of sentences, especially in their subjects, help readers understand what a passage is generally about. A sense of coherence arises when a sequence of topics comprises a narrow set of related ideas. But the context of each sentence is lost by seemingly random shifts of topics. With the aid of pronouns, subjects and topics can be consolidated
- 23. ~ COHERENCE ~ Nothing can be done to remedy a passage with disconnected subjects However, disorganization/incoherence occasioned by subject-topic difference and overlong, inconsistent topics is another matter… …as in the following disjointed passage, color-coded for your convenience: Consistent ideas toward the beginning of sentences, especially in their subjects, help readers understand what a passage is generally about. A sense of coherence arises when a sequence of topics comprises a narrow set of related ideas. But the context of each sentence is lost by seemingly random shifts of topics. With the aid of pronouns, subjects and topics can be consolidated, and it is advisable that the subject-topic be concentrated towards the beginning of the sentence When consolidated, subjects and topics can form what is called a Topic String (e.g. readers, they, that, topics, etc.), with a single anchoring subject (in this case readers)—this is a test of coherence
- 24. Exercise #2 Improve the following short sentences by reducing and consolidating subjects and topics New models at the back of the store, especially designer ones, motivate consumers to empty their pockets. A feeling of frivolity emerges when the madness subsides. Left in its wake is the certainty that history will repeat itself next holiday season. Tweet your answers (*might require two tweets) #eatingcrows
- 25. ~ Errors That Impair Coherence ~ Bogging sentences down in throat-clearing that delays the subject/topic, e.g., “And therefore, it is important to note that, in Eastern states since 1980, acid rain has become a serious problem.” When done repeatedly in the space of a single text, the focus is obscured Faking coherence with strategically placed and inappropriate conjunctions meant to create a logical connection where none exist e.g., “Both reporters and the president are human, however, subject to error and favoritism.”
- 26. Exercise #3 Edit/rearrange the following sentence in order to clarify it and give its subject priority Moreover, it should be made known that, at the 1984 trial, the prosecution failed to mount an adequate case against the defendant. Tweet your answers #eatingcrows
- 27. Exercise #4 Rectify the following passage by replacing the conjunction with two or more better choices The clerk and his wife keep a registered revolver in their dépanneur. Nevertheless, their son has furnished them with many a firearm to keep at home. Tweet your answers #eatingcrows
- 28. ~ OVERVIEW ~ Subjects that rehash familiar ideas/information before the introduction of new ideas/information are key to Cohesion Reduce topics, consolidate with subjects and standardize with the aid of pronouns in order to make a text coherent The spectrum: Clarity < Cohesion < Coherence
- 29. THANK YOU