Rules From Men
- 1. We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side.
- 2. These are our rules: • Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
- 3. 1. • Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
- 4. 1. • Crying is blackmail.
- 5. 1. • Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: • Subtle hints do not work! • Strong hints do not work! • Obvious hints do not work! • JUST SAY IT!
- 6. 1. • ‘Yes’ and ‘No’ are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question
- 7. 1. • Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for
- 8. 1. • A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor
- 9. 1. • Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days
- 10. 1. • If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us
- 11. 1. • If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
- 12. 1. • You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done • Not both • If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself
- 13. 1. • Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials
- 14. 1. • Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we
- 15. 1. • ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings. • Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit. • We have no idea what mauve is.
- 16. 1. • If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
- 17. 1. • If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle
- 18. 1. • If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear
- 19. 1. • When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine, Really
- 20. 1. • You have enough clothes
- 21. 1. • You have too many shoes
- 22. 1. • I am in shape. Round is a shape.
- 23. 1. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's like camping.
- 24. Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
- 25. Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them an education