Never Mind The Nooboos. Part One
- 1. In which we meet the unhappy couple and the first six children are vomited into the world to terrorize me forever more.
- 2. Hello one and all to my sad attempt at a 26 pregnancy challenge. In the style of MythMil and DeBunny, I will be attempting at a mix of population explosion and 10 kid challenge. Yeah, I was bored and wanted to try it out. Here are the couple, just graduated from college and ready to go.
- 3. Name: Regina Emery Havar Aspiration: Knowledge Secondary Aspiration: Family Turn Ons: Red hair/Glasses Turn Off: Fat Personality: Aquarius (4,4,4,7,6) Hobby: Nature Regina comes with gold badges in Toymaking and Robot...ery and a silver badge in Gardening. She has high points in most skills and max enthusiasm in both tinkering and arts and crafts.
- 4. Name: Klaus DeMarco Aspiration: Knowledge Secondary Aspiration: Family Turn Ons: Blonde/Make Up Turn Off: Smell Personality: Virgo (9,2,6,3,5) Hobby: Science Klaus comes with gold badges in Gardening, Sewing and Flower Arranging and all skills maxed byt Mechanical, which has two empty spots. He also looks slightly Japanese, which is an unexpected perk. While I did make him, I payed very little attention.
- 5. Klaus and Regina are quick to get married after four years at college engaged. The only witness is the vampiric paperboy. 'I vant to deliver your paper. Ah ah ah.' Nice. Why is the paperboy a vampire, I hear you ask. Well, the Pyre family of my legacy "The 'Pyre Chronicles" just moved into this neighbourhood, and have been biting everyone they can. This was the work of the teenage hottie, Angel.
- 6. Hey guys! 'I hate you!' You would Regina. Luckily, her husband is nicer to me. They both get to finding jobs for their LTWs. Klaus wants to become Education Minster and Regina wants to be a World Class Ballet Dancer. Don't we all? 'Are you still here?' I hope that you have quads every time you give birth!
- 7. 'MONEY!!' It seems that we've found a way to keep Regina happy. She is a faux Knowledge sim. Her wants are more like that of a Pleasure sim and she rolls wants to buy stuff like a Fortune sim. Never wants to skill, hence the gaping gap between her skills and Klaus's. Anyways, along with their base money and the money made from selling most of the crap they made/grew in college, we can afford a mighty fine...box house.
- 8. The newly weds waste no time conceiving baby number uno. 'Go away!' 'Umm...please can we have some privacy...Alice...pleas e?' For you Klaus, not Regina. Meanie! P.S. First try! Klaus has got some great swimmers in his tank.
- 9. What's up Genie? 'Genie?' Do you prefer Reg? 'Genie is fine. And I feel all cranky and moody and irate.' Same as always then. 'Oh, yeah. But that doesn't explain my sudden desire for chocolate covered mushroom ravioli in custard.' BABIES!1!!!one!
- 10. 'And one day my family will be so big it will take over the whole world!' Way to aim small there, Klaus. I love the talk to plant option. Even as we are being judged to get into the Garden Club, Klaus continues to sell propaganda to the oranges. We got in, but no wishing well. *pout* ALICE WANTS A WISHING WELL!
- 11. Having fun being fat, pregnant and useless? 'Why is that strange lady playing my piano?' Because you never do. And it's Klaus's piano. 'I sense many pointless arguments between us.' Indeed. I cannot wait until I move my simself into the neighbourhood.
- 12. *squeal* Best. Townie. Ever. Elf Ears. Smexy hair. Off beat clothing. Pouting lips. And his name is SETH! Excuse me while I fall into a quivering heap on the floor. Finally, a half decent townie has been generated in my game!
- 13. Promotions mean friend making. I really am no good at friend making. I can get a sim 20 lovers or 50 woo hoos, but when it comes to making friends without flirting, kissing, hugging and woo hooing, I suck. I tend to just have my sims meet a load of people and then have a phone calling marathon, fuelled by Red Bull.
- 14. Oh, I guess this little guy deserves an introduction. This is Genie and Klaus's college pet, Reepicheep. He's named after my recently deceased guinea pig, who was named after the mouse from Narnia. Somehow, he hasn't died yet, but let's see if he's still here at the end of the challenge. If so, I will call it a success.
- 15. 'My gorgeous and well toned body, she is ruined!' Bwa ha ha ha! This is the start of a downward spiral for you, Reg my dear.
- 16. 'Yeah, listen. I need someone whacked. Uh huh. She's...well, she lives Beyond The Glass Screen. No, I'm not pulling your leg. Yes, I want Alice killed. Hey, don't take that tone with me, sir. I was told that you were the way to go if I wanted someone dead. Oh, well go woo hoo yourself!' Regina, darling, why are you trying to have me killed? '*looks pointedly at stomach* Hmmm...' Oh. Right.
- 17. 'KLAUS! You cannot make me laugh like that!' 'Why? Oh no, did I hurt the baby? Shall I drive you to the hospital?' 'No, but I may pee myself!' Nice. Way to give your overly kind husband a heart attack Genie.
- 18. There's something missing from this picture...
- 19. Much better. 'Grr.' Was that meant to scare me Genie?
- 20. Woot! Klaus maxed all his skills, bringing in a huge aspiration bonus. If only it had been a LTW. 'I know. It's a shame.' Now, start making more friends so that we can get you promoted to your actual LTW.
- 21. 'AHHHHH! Where's Klaus?' Gardening. 'Well, can you ask him to come here? The baby is coming!' I could, but you tried to have me killed, so I won't. 'AHHHHH!!!!!'
- 22. WTF? Oh, I accidentally downloaded genticised skins again. Just a moment...
- 23. ...much better. Here he is, baby number 1, Admes. Green eye like Regina, red hair like Klaus and skintone 2. He is named after a vamipre in one of Jennifer Rardin's books. They're a good read if, like me, you are obsessed by vampires, necromancy and various other undead type things. P.S. I have the triplets and quads hack and to make this all interesting, I have each on 25%. Bwa ha ha ha! I'm evil to myself.
- 24. The happy couple waste no time on making another batch of kidlets. First time again. Woot!
- 25. You okay Genie? '*barf* I hate you for doing this to me! *gurgle splash*' Sure sure. You love it really.
- 26. BIRFDAY TIEM!!! Yeah, expect a lot of this and don't expect me to ever come up with interesting or witty captions.
- 27. Post makeover. He's pretty cute. I have to admit, it took time for him to grow on me. Klaus and Regina's genetics look a little odd on toddlers, but they grow up cute. Honest. At the moment his cheekbones are a little bit crazy.
- 28. Klaus gets right to teaching Admes his toddler skills. 'He's a clever kid, my boy. But...why is he glowing?' Magic, my dear Klaus. Magic.
- 29. Nice. 'What the hell are you making me do this?' It's Friday. 'You say that as though it explains everything!' It does. Every Friday we have a nice family portrait like this. Klaus and Admes don't seem to mind. 'They are morons. Now let me go and waste everyone's time with a sucsession of 500 point wants that will dirve you insane.' Have I mentioned how much I hate you recently, Reg? 'DON'T. CALL. ME. THAT!!!' Whatever, Reg. 'RARGGGG!'
- 30. Step away from the baby! 'What? Alice, he is my son and all.' 'Awice? Who's da weird lady?' Point proven. This is the first time she's been near Admes since...birth.
- 31. If this isn't quads I'll eat my hat. Look at that belly. No way is that one kid. DUDE!! 'I'm like a whale with feet.' I've always thought that.
- 32. I'm not mean. I really wasn't paying attention when I placed the xylophone. I didn't mean to have Admes permanatly in the corner. Oh wells. I could fix it, but I won't.
- 33. 'WHY WON'T YOU ANAL PROBE ME?' Nice. I want aliens, as I like aliens. But they are refusing to come and get little Klaus. Annoying.
- 34. MOAR BABIES!!!! Yes, plural. Okay, let's see if I can get this right.
- 35. First is a boy, named Brian. He has skin tone 4, blonde hair and green eyes, making him a clone of Regina. He is named after Brian from The Dresden Dolls, one of my favourite bands.
- 36. Another boy, this one is called Benjamin, but will be known from here on as Bennie. He has skin tone 1, green eyes and red hair (IRISH CHARM!!!) and is named after the band Breaking Benjamin, who are awesome.
- 37. A girl this time, named Bellatrix, after Bellatrix Lestrange from Harry Potter. She has skin tone 4, blue eyes and blonde hair. From now on she shall be known as Trixie, for a reason that will become quickly apparent.
- 38. And last is another girl, this one named Beatrix (see why I needed a nickname for Bellatrix?), but will now we known as Beetroot. She has skintone 3, green eyes and red hair, and is named after Beatrix Potter.
- 39. 'So, there's still room for one more kid.' Yes, no time is wasted after the birth of the quads. They're dumped in a room filled with snapdragons and baby C is made.
- 40. YAY! *snore*
- 41. Ummm....random Curious brother, please put Trixie down. 'She was dirty and now she isn't. I do good.' Creepy. GENIE! Come and save the baby!
- 42. I don't have a good picture of Admes's face, but trust me, he's cute! I get him straight to skilling. I wants points! 'But-' POINTS!
- 43. 'Again?' Many, many times again. Bwa ha ha ha!
- 44. '*sigh*' Klaus? '...' Klaus? 'Why is he staring at me like that?' 'I love you.' Yeah, Klaus follows Genie about like a lost puppy, while she acts as though she doesn't even know what a nice point is. They are an odd couple.
- 45. What is it? 'SNOWDAY!!!!' Cool. Now, go skill. 'Darn. I'd rather go to school.' Whatever.
- 46. Creativity. In the style of Myth Mil and DeBunny, I will be putting tidbits of info here. It took a while to decide what to chose, but I think it's a good one. See, people are generally ignorant when it comes to my homeland of Britain. Especially Americans. No offence, you're a lovely race of people, but I've been asked one too many times if I have lunch with the queen or how come I don't live in London because that's all there is. Information put here will be taken from the book "England: 1000 Things You Need To Know" by Nicholas Hobbes. Good book, great read.
- 47. FOUR BIRFDAYS. I'll just show you the little tykes post makeover.
- 48. Trixie. All say awww.
- 49. Beetroot. Again, aww.
- 50. *faints* My favourite so far, Brian. He's so darn cute.
- 51. And Bennie. He looks a bit like an alien at the moment, which is why you will see no shots of him head on.
- 52. Trixie is fast to start making friends. 'I'm a princess and everyone will do as I say.' Cuteness. Now go and skill!
- 53. 'Why the hell are you making me do this?' Because I knew that it would piss you off. 'I. Hate. You.'
- 54. Toddler skilling time. I won't bore you with it.
- 55. Nawwww. While Trixie has ten nice points, it's Beetroot that acts like she does. She's so nice to everyone, even Bennie the outcast. 'Love Bennie!' 'What is love?'
- 56. DID I SAY YOU COULD SMUSTLE? SKILLING NOW!
- 57. 'But...Alice...I've forgotten what fun is.' I don't care. The faster you skill the faster you will be able to have fun again. '*sigh* Yes ma'am.'
- 58. Logic. The population of England was, in the 2001 census, 49,138,831. 23,922,144 were men and 25,216,687 were female. Bwa ha ha ha! Women rule this little island!
- 59. Mechanical. England is 50,363 square miles (130,439 square metres). The highest point is Scafell Pike, at 3,210ft and the lowest point on land is Holme Fen, Cambridgeshire at 9ft below sea level! Told you it was tiny.
- 60. 'AHH! Twin wives having babies!' No, Klaus. It's a mirror. Just one wife. 'Phew.' 'I. WILL. KILL. YOU. ALL!!!!'
- 61. Baby girl C, named Carrie after Carrie Underwood. Skintone 3, blue eyes and blonde hair. Cuteness. Now, lock her in the snapdragon room and get skilling. SKILLING!!!!
- 62. To aid the skilling, Klaus whips out this doobrie-ma-thing and makes it Autumn again. Not Fall. Autumn. All the languages the Sims is translated into, why not English? IT'S AUTUMN!!! NOT FALL!!!! In case you didn't know, I'm English.
- 63. Charisma. The furthest place from the sea in England is Coton in the Elms (nice name, isn't it? Very English), Derbyshire, which is 72 miles away from the big blue. The traditional geographic centre is Meriden in Warwickshire. However, the Ordnance Survey's Gravitational Method Of Mapping gives the title to Fenny Drayton in Leicestershire, as it includes the nation's small islands. Yeah, there are islands smaller than England. Unbelievable.
- 64. Cooking. The highest recorded temperature in England was 38.5 degrees C (101.3 degrees F) in Kent on 10 August 2003 and the coldest temperature was -26.1 degrees C (-15 degrees F), in Shropshire on Jan 10th 1982. Unless you live in Antartica, never complain that your home is cold. You don't know cold until you live here. That highest temp was a fluke that has never happened since.
- 65. Logic. Our principal crops are wheat, barley, potatoes, sugar beet and oilseed rape. Natural resources include coal, petroleum, natural gas (farmers and all, they can't help it), tin, limestone, iron ore, salt, clay, chalk, gypsum, lead and silica. If only it was gold. That would be awesome.
- 66. Body. We have a 99% literacy rate, though you wouldn't know it talking to the "hoodies" I live near. However, the low intelligence of my locals may be linked to the 81% of the population that own mobile phones.
- 67. Cleaning. Our national motto is "Dieu et mon droit" ("God and my right") though most real English people will tell you that it actually is "I'm not racist, but...". And that's that then. Admes, feel free to act like a child. 'YAY!!!'
- 68. 'WHEEEEEEEEE!' Cute kid. We now have four days of this before he turns teen and stops lagging up the lot. I'm not cruel or callous. I just want to get the job done.
- 69. Creativity. The four corners of England are: Most northerly point: Marshall Meadows, Northumberland Most southerly point: Lizard Point, Cornwall Most easterly point: Lowestoft Ness, Suffolk Most westerly point: Land's End, Cornwall
- 70. BEES!! Bored, I sent Klaus and Admes hiking, and they bring back a swarm of bees! LOL! 'Quick son! Grab my plumbob! We'll float away!!'
- 71. Logic. The word "England" derives from "Land of the Angles", referring to the Germanic tribe from Angeln that called England it's home at some point in the past. Vikings, basically. Vikings named us.
- 72. Charisma. "The Heptarchy were the seven kingdoms that ruled Anglo- Saxon England for three hundred years until Wessex gained supremacy around AD 829: East Anglia, Essex, Kent, Mercia, Northumbria*, Sussex and Wessex. *Northumbria was divided for the most part into two waring kingdoms, Deira and Bernicia."
- 73. 'Daddy, this being a kid and having fun isn't as fun as I though it would be. I miss skilling.' 'I know what you mean.' *eye roll* Sims.
- 74. Okay, another quad birthday. You know the drill. Post makeover pics only.
- 75. The adorable Beetroot.
- 76. Trixie grew into her looks wonderfully.
- 77. Still handsome, it's Brian.
- 78. And Bennie surprised me by coming out as, in my opinion, the cutest kid so far. He was a weird looking toddler, but look now! 'Cheers Alice. Can I skill now?' Not quite yet. One more birthday.
- 79. Yeah, the whole family assembles for Carrie's birthday. Even Regina, who was at work for the other four. WOOT!
- 80. Shy little thing, but so cute. Carrie is a knock out, and with ten nice points is bound to be a little sweetheart.
- 81. Here it ends for now. See you next time for more nooboo based "fun". L-R, B-F it's Klaus, Carrie, Regina, Bennie, Admes, Beetroor, Trixie and Brian. Points are as follows: Dream Dates: 4 (4 points) Maxed Skills: 11 (33 points) A+ Report Cards: 1 (0.5 points) Good Birthday Count: 5 (5 points) LTWs: 1 (3 points) Family Friends: 10 (5 points) Total : 50.5