What if? q#1 oct edit
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The document discusses six modes of attachment that help children feel a sense of belonging: senses, sameness, belonging and loyalty, significance, love, and being fully known. It provides guidance on using each mode to strengthen attachment, such as using ongoing orientation to help children relax in new contexts, promoting feelings of belonging through affirming statements, and looking for signs of improved attachment from students. Overall, the document offers tools and strategies for educators to enhance children's sense of belonging through different aspects of attachment.
What if? q#1 oct edit
- 1. What if belongingness is misunderstood? 5 essentials for belonging: 1. Attachment is a pre- eminent need 2. Safety and agency 3. Significance 4. New skills 5. Hope – never expect a child to arrive with their own hope 1 Question 1
- 2. Attachment Modes Question 12 Central to emotional openess, emotional availability, emotional responsiveness to others Foundational for sufficient emotional readiness for school Attachment modes create relationship when children are alarmed by feelings of separation 6 Attachment Modes 1. Senses 2. Sameness 3. Belonging & Loyalty 4. Significance 5. Love 6. Being fully known
- 3. Attachment through senses Question 13 Smells, sights, sounds can be overwhelming Pace is too fast/slow Personal space Senses guide/interfere our conscious attention Rest/digest mechanism Use ongoing “orientation” to guide & coach to relax a child in this new context
- 4. Attachment through sameness Question 14 Sameness evokes emulation of adult Child tends to take our point of view, repeat our words, believe what we say, follow our directions Child needs sameness when: the child expresses a sense of feeling “different” or not belonging, fear they are not normal, say they don’t have friends, cannot initiate play with others, or cannot work in groups
- 5. Attachment through belonging and loyalty Question 15 Promote feelings of belonging by saying: I chose you, I care about you, I missed you, you come up with good ideas for this class Legitimize strong emotions by saying: that was frustrating, that was alarming, that is a lonely feeling
- 6. Attachment through belonging and loyalty Question 16 Promote feelings of loyalty by saying: I understand you I hear you I see your strong feelings I like to hear what you think I like to see what you make I will wait for you I will listen to you Comments need to be personalized and heart felt
- 7. Attachment through significance Question 17 Each child has their own journey through sameness, belonging and loyalty, toward significance Love and Being Known follow but will wax and wane through our lifetime
- 8. What if belongingness is misunderstood? 5 essentials for belonging: Attachment – is a pre- eminent need Safety and agency Significance New skills Hope – never expect a child to arrive with their own hope 8 Question 1
- 9. What if belongingness is misunderstood? 5 essentials for belonging: Attachment – is a pre- eminent need Safety and agency Significance New skills Hope – never expect a child to arrive with their own hope 9 Question 1
- 10. What if belongingness is misunderstood? 5 essentials for belonging: Attachment – is a pre- eminent need Safety and agency Significance New skills Hope – never expect a child to arrive with their own hope 10 Question 1
- 11. Tools for Belongingness Be aware of individual sensory sensitivities Ongoing “orientation” Procedural or Emotional orientation Use “sameness” to build connections “Connect before you direct” Enhance connections with statements of belonging, loyalty, & significance Look for signs of improved Attachment from students 11 Question 1