Resolving and Transforming Conflict
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This document discusses resolving conflicts constructively through mediation and transforming conflicts in a positive manner. It provides tips for dealing with anger, listening effectively, and having constructive dialogues. The main approaches for dealing with conflicts are avoidance, aggression, accommodation, compromise and collaboration. Mediation is presented as an effective way to resolve disputes with an impartial third party helping parties come to an agreement. The goal is to move from merely resolving conflicts to transforming them in a way that builds understanding and positive relationships.
Resolving and Transforming Conflict
- 1. PEACE THEME 6: RESOLVING AND TRANSFORMING CONFLICTS
- 3. RESOLVING CONFLICTS CONSTRUCTIVELY IS A SKILL THAT CAN BE TAUGHT AND LEARNED.
- 6. What is Anger? • More commonly experienced emotions when parties are in conflict. • Not merely irritation or disappointment but a combined feeling of disappointment, anxiety and indignation. • Affects our health
- 7. Here are some ways to change the form of our anger: o Recognize that you are angry o Distance yourself from situation o Release anger physically in direct forms o Use relaxation techniques o Calm your mind- talk to yourself o Apply Therapeutic techniques o Use social support-talk to someone o Redirect energy o Cry it out o Turn to spiritual support
- 9. How do we deal with other people’s anger? o Allow expression. Listen o Do not counter-attack o Stand in the shoe of other o Help him/her to calm down o Paraphrase/Clarify o Explain your Situation o Look into options together o If you can’t deal with the other person’s wrath, ask for help
- 10. Main options in Dealing with Conflicts o Avoidance or Withdrawal- when the person has no power to change the situation o Aggression- when the person considers the issue important and will use power to achieve his/her goal. o Accommodation- when a person gives up to preserve harmony in the relationship. o Compromise- when both parties cannot get what they want fully and they usually meet in the middle. o Collaboration- when both issue and relationship are important to the parties.
- 11. Steps in the Collaborative Problem Solving Approach o Story Telling- exchange information on what happened. o Focusing- focus the discussion on each other’s underlying needs and interest. o Thinking UP- Think of all possible options that can reconcile needs. o Concurring- Evaluate alternatives and agree on the best option.
- 12. Some Tips to a Good Dialogue o Speak in a gentle, non-threatening manner o Think carefully of what you are going to say o Use the I-message o Admit your own responsibility to the conflict o Avoid using hazy statements and global words o Be willing to tell the other person his/her positive attributes o Show positive regard and respect o Be tough on the problem, not on the person o Don’t take anything personally o Be solution-oriented
- 13. Listening Tips o Actively listen o Listen with empathy o Accept criticism of your ideas or behavior o Paraphrase what you heard and clarify when needed
- 14. What is Mediation? • An effective way of resolving disputes without the need to go to court. • It involves an independent third party - a mediator - who helps both sides come to an agreement.
- 15. There are characteristics or qualities essential to a good mediator; o Mediators have to be impartial to establish trust among parties in conflict. o They should be nonjudgmental and understanding. o Mediators must be flexible and creative. o They should know how to reframe situations and broaden perspectives. o Mediators should be good at analysis. o Mediators should show regard and concern for the parties in conflict. o They should be trustworthy and optimistic. o They should anticipate a positive outcome and influence adversaries with such hope. o They should encourage the disputants to try again.
- 16. From Conflict Resolution to Conflict Transformation “Ending something not desired” “Building something desired”